No, Green Bean. They’re seven-lobed monstrosities that look kinda like sugar maples. That’s what I’ve been calling them, but I don’t want to be wrong.
[sub]Isn’t everyone glad I bumped this thread just to post that?[/sub]
Why oh why can’t I get a girl???
Oh yah I’m a shy little chickenshit, nevermind.
Property owners - trim your goddamn trees! You’ve let them grow so much that nobody taller than 4 feet can use the sidewalk.
I know this is America and anyone who walks instead of driving three blocks is a second-class citizen and a pathetic loser, but don’t rub my face in it!
Why do my fucking neighbours keep leaving nasty notes on my car’s windscreen when I park in front of their house? There is no law which says that the space in front of your house is reserved for the owner of the house or their guest to park in. I park there because the house two up from me has 4 people, each with a car living in it, and no driveway, and they all park on the road, most of them outside my house. I park as close as I can to my house because my housemates take up all our driveway with their cars. You, my dipshit neighbours, have two driveways, with parking space for four cars, and only one car ever there!
Get over yourselves!
Whenever Matt Damon or Ben Affleck star in a movie, the trailers and TV ads need to remind me that the movie includes “Academy Award Winner Matt Damon” (or the other guy).
Hey dipshits! They didn’t win an Academy Award for acting! Unless they wrote the movie, I don’t wanna hear it!
People who go one mile an hour slower than I do really piss me off. I have to speed way the hell up to pass them, and then I look like a total dick for slowing down to just faster than they’re going once I’m back in front of them.
Plus, usually when I pull along side, they seem to get into this macho pissing contest and speed up a little, so I have to go even faster, then pull in ahead of them and slow down to the speed I want to go, which is now slower than the dickweed behind me is currently going, so he passes me and slows back down to his original moronic 59 mph, and we’re back where we started except now I’m pissed.
Oh, and lieu? Stop getting to threads five minutes before I do and posting exactly the same kind of wiseass remark I was going to post.
My friend is calling me too often.
Once or twice a week is OK, but four times in three days (and he talks and talks and talks about Nothing) is Too Much. I’m not your wife. Ramble on to her.
He talked for like two hours yesterday and I couldn’t tell you one thing he said because it’s the same shit over and over.
People who cut some God-forsaken brand of cheese on the elevator and then get off the floor before me. Christ man, was that Munster?
People who go one mile an hour faster than I do really piss me off. I have to speed up just to keep them from driving their bumper into my groin, and then I look like a total dick if I need to stay in my lane to make a turn.
Once they pass me they do this macho pissing contest of speeding up with noise and fury, and snap their head around to look at me. “Just drive and leave me to my misery” I think to myself. Once or twice a week is okay, but every day? If I find out where you all live, I’ll leave a note on your car. Deal with it,
People who try to pass themselves off as country for whatever godawful reason and then pronounce it “You-all.”
It’s “Y’all.” Just one syllable, dammit!!
Can you blame me for having a long fuse?
(I am actually flattered by the mention of my name)
Hows this for lame - Lobsang you shit, you are a bit bored today. Bastard.
Funny that my latest rant admits to being lame (I think)
Now I am off to find out what sperfur has linked to.
This is my conversation with someone over a pdf file about a half hour ago:
Me: I’m not going to be able to send that pdf file to you for another few minutes. Our server is down, so our offices are unable to communicate electronically, both internally and externally.
Idiot: Well, I need the file. Why don’t you zip it and email it to me?
Me: I wish I could do that, but even if the file is compressed, it won’t email if the server is down.
Idiot: Ummm, why don’t you send me the information via word document?
Me: Well, we can’t email anything to anyone right now, but the help desk is working on it and will have it fixed very soon.
Idiot: (Getting belligerent) Why aren’t you working on it?
Me: I’m in research and design. I wish I could fix it, but I don’t know how to fix our server.
Idiot: Well, you taught me how to attach files.
Me: (Thinking “huh???”) Yes, I did. I’ve been using outlook for quite a while.
Idiot: Well, if you can halp me attach files, why can’t you attach one and send it to me?
Me: Because our email is down.
Idiot: Oh.
Me: (Sigh in relief)
Idiot: So, why do I get this error message whenever I try to email someone?
Holy fucking shit.
Ever notice?
That when you’re out driving around in the country, and you come across a passel of cows in a field. (Yes, I’ve herd of cows. I use my own words, thankyouverymuch) And you roll down the window and yell out, “Moo!” they never even look up!
But… if you yell, “Spaghetti!” they get all excited instantly!
What the fuck is that about?!
overlyverbose: Good rant. Might be a silly question, but: couldn’t you have made the pdf a self extractor - and then emailed it to him? See, you need to think laterally in these situations.
NoClueBoy: Those cows obviously flunked bovine University.
Um, I had a minor/petty pitting. It was just here. 
Now where did it go? :mad: Oh, minor/petty pitting? Where are you?
[celestina wanders off muttering to herself about slippery minor/petty pittings]
These people go to Taco Bell, get a bunch of stuff, pull around to MY STREET to eat it, and then throw the trash on MY LAWN.
Always Taco Bell. There’s every other fast food place out there, all in a row, but only the Taco Bell wrappings and shit land on my lawn, and it happens every day, sometimes 2 or 3 times.
Oh, and you people from Alberta, Canada? Thanks a lot for sending your cold front south. If I knew a bad word for Canadians I would put it here because it’s now sn*wing like crazy (but thankfully obscuring the Taco Bell trash, for now).
I don’t like tornados
Quite right. That’s why I left Okla. Must remember that when shoveling walk.
And let us not forget that it is three FULL working days.
So unless you bring in the check on Monday, in which case the processing days are Tues, Wed, Thurs, you have to wait until the next week to pick it up.
“Three days clearance” - what a fucking joke. A lie.
And an update…I actually deposited the cheque at a post-office, and I only found out when I checked my balance the other day via Phone Banking that the clearance in THAT case is FIVE DAYS…with all the conditions you posted above istara.
What is the fucking difference? The deposit is still made electronically…so why the discrepancy between banks and P.O.'s
Again I exclaim, fucking bastiges.