I think this is an awesome idea. I don’t have a problem with the poster, but as other women have said, most assaults don’t happen in secluded parking lots, and you can follow every single rule and still get assaulted.
If such a thing were to happen to anyone I wouldn’t say it was their “fault”. The fault almost always lies with the person actually committing the crime. But that doesn’t mean they couldn’t have prevented it by not leaving their valuables around, and it doesn’t mean it would be a bad idea to make people aware of the fact that it may be in their interests to be more careful with their valuables when they have strangers around.
It is doubtful that clothes have that much impact in many situations.
Going back to the types of rape that most commonly happen, they occur when the victim is known to the person. Which is less a “found her/him nearly naked in the dance floor”, and more “she is the coworker/neighbor/girlfriend”. In the first two, for sure, the rapist has most commonly seen the woman dressed in what would be considered “conservative” clothing (work clothes, casual clothes, t-shirts and jeans, etc.). Yet the victim was still raped. So… basically, most women wardrobe would seem to attract potential rapists, hence they should all just stay home? 
So, if I put posters up in the men’s room that say “how to avoid getting robbed” and include
- Don’t carry an iPhone
- Don’t carry cash
- Don’t invite anyone into your house
Those suggestions wouldn’t strike you as restrictive to your personal freedoms?
Or when you take a woman home for the night, you think its a reasonable expectation that in the passion of undressing, you should lock your valuables in a safe, so she doesn’t have the opportunity to rob you?
Because, honestly, that is what a lot of the suggestions to woman on rape avoidance sound like - restrictions on our freedom or unreasonable actions. The ones that aren’t blindingly obvious - like don’t walk down a dark alley by yourself and park in well lit areas. (how often, as a man, are you told not to walk down a dark alley by yourself or park in well lit areas to avoid getting mugged? Is that advice on the back of your bathroom stalls?) And there proportionally is too much education on “how to avoid being raped” compared to teaching men “hey, that’s behavior is not ok.”
The problem is that those choices can have real impact on a person’s life. It’s not just about not wearing fuck-me pumps and a micro mini to a drunken frat party full of strangers. Those rules on that poster would suggest a woman shouldn’t work late at the office, either alone (how can she get to her car?) or with a male co-worker, unless she knows him “well”. She shouldn’t go on business trips alone, or with a male coworker. She shouldn’t walk across the corporate campus after dark to get a file in another building, or even through a dark, semi-deserted office building. There are pretty significant limits on your personal life, as well: she shouldn’t walk in a neighborhood after dark, she shouldn’t live anywhere where she won’t be able to park within sight of her front door, she should only socialize in small groups where she knows everyone. She basically has to be able to afford to join a gym or buy home equipment to even exercise, because it’s pretty much dark outside within a couple hours after the end of the workday most of the year.
It’s well and good to say “they can do what they want with this information”, but it’s not clear to me that any of those precautions really make that big of a difference. They are almost superstitions that women follow to make sure it’s clear we didn’t “want it” because we have this idea that sexual assault is something that happens when women are stupid and don’t take responsibility.
Lol.
Ya, because men just can’t help themselves around scantily clad women (Like the time my 68 yr old friend was raped, while wearing a pair of sweat pants and shirt covered in paint!) and thus are positively forced into becoming rapists. I feel your pain bro.
ETA Also, what Dangerosa said. All these “good” suggestions would mean you need to live in a fucking bubble. Limit your contact to only those who share your same values? You’d never go to another gathering of anything (concert, party, reunion) again. No just keep me away from those who feel like they can’t fucking control themselves because I wore a halter top.
And unfortunately, a well-meaning sign advising women not to do all these things sets women up for shame and guilt when they’ve been attacked after they’ve committed the cardinal sin of not avoiding a “secluded area”, for instance.
That’s the problem with these posters. It’s not that they blame victims directly. But they promote the attitude that if you do X, Y, and Z, you’ll be safe. If you end up being attacked, well, it might’ve been because you didn’t do X, Y, and Z correctly. With so much focus on common sense, the implication is that victims become victims because they’ve failed in some way. Maybe this is true in many cases, but to think a restroom poster is going to fix what is a symptom of the human condition is laughable.
So roughly how do you think this works out? How many women see the well-meaning sign? How many are not attacked by acting on its suggestions? How many are subsequently attacked after ignoring the suggestions? How many of them feel “shame and guilt?”
Plenty of women see the poster. Presumably, any woman who has the need to use that particularly restroom will.
Of that fraction who see it, I suspect close to none will feel compelled to change their behaviors because of it. Most of them probably already keep such tips in mind already (except the last one, because it’s absurdly impractical), and of those who don’t, it is highly unlikely a a 5-second glance at a 8x10 sign in a restroom is going to be eradicating years worth of habits and practices.
How many are subsequently attacked after ignoring the suggestions? If the restroom is on a military base, probably a decent number. But this is the wrong question to be asking. How many of these rapes could have been prevented had these women followed these poster suggestions? You don’t know the answer to this question do you? Just like the suggestion that women refrain from wearing sexy clothes, it’s an idea based on a lazy assumption. Not any evidence at all. If you read, watch, or listen to the accounts of actual rape victims attacked while on active duty, it’s pretty damn obvious these ladies are assaulted by men who aren’t going to be stymied by an attended drink or a non-secluded area.
Are you seriously asking how many women feel “shame and guilt” after rape? Seriously?
I don’t know about that- in my old neighborhood, every boy knew that, if he crossed any lines with a girl, he would eventually get his butt kicked by her father and brothers. That was a pretty good deterrent.
But somehow, I’m not sure you’d like that method.
Which reminds me of a quote by former NFL ofensive lineman Conrad Dobler:
Or, “I’ve gotten away with it before, and probably will this time too.”
And also to not invite strangers into their house, especially if you’re intoxicated. How did he know she wasn’t planning to do something to him that was worse than stealing from him?
The poster is probably useless, but it shouldn’t be offensive, any more than it should be offensive to ME if a TV commercial with McGruff the Crime Dog tells me, “Don’t flash money in public.” Or if Smokey the Bear tells me in a radio ad to be very careful with fire.
Now, I’m already old enough and smart enough to say “No duh” to such ads. But if I ever do get robbed after counting out some money on a subway car at night, is McGruff going to make me feel guilty??? Am I going to cry that, “It’s all MY fault, because I didn’t listen to McGruff”??? Or, if my house ever catches fire, will I remember Smokey’s ad and think, “Everybody’s judging me, they all think it was my fault”???
No, and that was NEVER the intention of the ad. When people try to offer common sense advice, the object is NOT to make us feel guilty if something bad happens to us!
I think it works out well for girls with fathers and brothers. Not so well for those without, as their vulnerability is very visible and they get the concentrated attention of every Tom, Dick and Harry who has convinced himself that only women with fathers and brothers deserve bodily autonomy, and that a lack of protectors indicates a woman is not worth protecting.
Agreed.
All I see in that poster is the lukewarm outcome of a political decision some higher ups made.
-“We had some unfavourable press reviews on how woman unfriendly we are. Anyone have any ideas on what we could do about it?”
-“Well, we could demand a male-to-female ratio of 50 % on all staff levels. We could change our culture entirely so that macho cameradie is frowned upon.”
-“Nah, we don’t have the time or the money for that. We just need to show the the naggers we made an effort. Yes, Mike, you had an idea? A poster, and only in the womens’ restroom? With an internal number on it so we keep any trouble indoors? Brilliant. See that it gets done. There, that wasn’t so hard. Now, next on the agenda…”
Maybe if you were raped, you would walk that shit off in a dispassionate manner and not blame yourself for being stupid, overly trusting, or reckless.
But most rape victims probably can’t say the same thing. Guess they are stupid for not being as calm and rational as you are, huh?
That strikes me as reductive and dogmatic. I think it’s actually along the lines of the thing I was talking about: “these men,” as if they’re a special breed of monster, instead of everyday dumbasses who can actually be dealt with. Obviously they know what they’re doing in the sense that they’re acting intentionally to get something - they know they’re committing the physical acts they’re committing - but what I said is that they don’t know that when we say “sexual assault,” we’re talking about the shit they’re doing. They are not, by and large, accomplished statutory construers.
For instance, I’m not saying they would deny (with anonymity assured or to their buddies, or whatever) the statement “I had sexual intercourse with someone, even though they did not want to, because they were too intoxicated (on alcohol or drugs) to resist my sexual advances (e.g., removing their clothes)” if that was what they had done (which about 5% of men said they had).
In that sense, sure, they know what they’re doing. What I’m saying is that even after you get them to admit that, if you then say to them “have you ever raped anybody” the overwhelming majority say no, without it occurring to them that they’ve just admitted it (or that they’d try to, or have tried to, etc.) before they denied it. They don’t understand. I’m sure most of them tell themselves they’re the shit because they’re “bad boys,” but they don’t know that they’re actually the bad guys. They think “these men” are the bad guys.
In my hypothetical, she isn’t specified to be a stranger, nor is it specified either party has been drinking.
In the case of my brother in law, she wasn’t and he hadn’t - it also wasn’t “coffee” it was “I broke up with my boyfriend, can I crash on your couch.”
THAT’S it. That sort of sums up why this is patronizing (or condescending - thanks Manda Jo) The McGruff ads are aimed at CHILDREN, presumably the rape ads are aimed at grown women who hold jobs in the facility.
(Smokey is about wildfire prevention, not about home fire safety - and when was the last time you were educated about home fire safety with a poster on the back of a bathroom stall - for that matter, when was the last time you were educated about home fire safety - for me, it was about sixth grade - oh, and my insurance agent saying we got a discount for a fire extinguisher under the sink).
I haven’t seen anything on results of *this *kind of message, but after a campaign targeted towards potential rapists in Vancouver, the sexual assualt rate dropped by about 10% (after increasing several years in a row before).
Source: ‘Don’t Be That Guy’ ad campaign cuts Vancouver sex assaults by 10 per cent in 2011 - The Globe and Mail, more about the campaign: http://www.edmontonpolice.ca/CommunityPolicing/PersonalPropertyCrimes/SexualAssault/Dontbethatguy.aspx
So a similar campaign, describing some typical situations of sexual assault and reinforcing the message that this is not OK seems more sensible to me.
Or there’s always #safetytipsforladies 
Advice like “Since most rapes are committed on the body, consider becoming a disincorporated being of pure azure light” and “Most women know their rapist, so make sure to never know anyone. Ever” do seem extremely effective, although slightly less practical than the ones on the poster.