Proper Trolling Etiquette.

Here are a few examples from the first chapter of *Trolling for Dummies. * Note, this is just the first chapter, so the fine points of hooking and reeling in are not yet developed. The subject matter is tired and overdone, and not at all creative. Let’s see what we can learn here.
#1
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=793259

The declaw cats thread. Tired and overdone. One of the bigger troll topics, second only to “Why should I vax my kids and get them sick” threads. Or perhaps, “I’m thinking about circumcising my 4 year old grandson without telling his parents first.”
These topics raise red flags, and should be avoided by a competent troll.

#2

Personal relationships are great ice breakers. Just like at a party, rush up the the cutest girl in the room and confess that you can’t get a date in the continental US, and ask if importing the one and only female in the world who will speak to you, via email, is a logical alternative. Try to work in red Cobalt and butt sex, it’s always good for a few laughs. Watch the cute girl run for cover.
#3
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=793249

Another good way to get attention, is a spin-off on the personal relationship idea. only this time, the relationship is with an insurmountable obstacle, pity and a family expecting more than you can deliver. This is a good way to get your virtual head pat and the much desired “ahhh, you need backrub” responses.
Good little trolls will avoid these very common mistakes.

Also, it helps to have a team working with you.

I’m not so sure about some of that. I’d have been very happy to do whatever “trolling” it takes that might score me a nice back-rub.

(ETA: Oops, just read OP more carefully – Forget the “virtual” back-rub. I’m trolling for a real IRL back-rub.)

I’m glad I’m not the only one who came to the same conclusions as the OP.

Trolls are bad… Mmkay?

You wordsmith, you!! I see what you did there! :wink:

So, you’re saying T-Minus is short for Troll-Minus? Ah, yes, I see it now.

New poster, declawing cats, troll for sure.

I didn’t see threads #1 or #3, but from the initial post of thread #2, the first thing I did was look at the join date, and, sure enough. Full of shit.

Hard to blame the Trolls when there is so much Troll-nip on this MB. It’s amazing how some idiot from nowhere can post a one-line, stupid as shit OP, never bother to return, and bait a dozen people to dance a jig while he watches. But that’s just the nature of this MB.

It is indeed. The board seems to invite trolling with the rule that prohibits the less gullible from pointing out it out.

Ah yes, because pointing out trolling works such magic in ending troll-started threads, and is almost always a fair accusation …

These would be claims I didn’t actually make, but if you feel the need, go for it.:smack:

Haha I replied to the 3rd thread on the list and pretty much assumed it was a troll given the join date and the repetition of please don’t be cruel or whatever he said. I just decided to answer it as though it wasn’t given the smallest chance it was true, also I had not seen the other threads by him.

Yep. The girlfriend one was a red flag, but to segue immediately into a cat declawing thread?

I tell ya this, the kid’s got a future in the trollery business! I haven’t seen this kind of chutzpah in years!

I replied to the second thread. However, I assumed he was a troll, but I could not state that in the thread. (Several posters got Mod Noted for doing just that.) I felt I was giving some good useful general information that maybe real people could use. Didn’t see the other two threads. Those reinforce my belief that T-Minus is a troll.

I’ve even heard of people creating threads solely to showcase the trolls’ (or troll’s?) recent efforts.

That would be brilliant. Let them know we’re watching them.

Interestingly, the only thread he’s posted in other than the three he’s started was to comment in a thread about whether the Dope is ever visited by professional trolls.

Can’t accuse him of lacking self awareness.

So he’s getting paid? How much do the Russians give him?