I wish I had made a note of this; a couple of months ago, I read a quote from some famous guy that went along these lines:
“People don’t realize the struggle it is for some people just to feel normal.”
That sums up living with an anxiety disorder/depression for me. When I feel good, I really appreciate it, because it is such a gift.
DocCathode, you’re absolutely right about what we’d do to take the imbalance away. When my anxiety goes into remission, I sometimes get massive migraines instead, and I’m HAPPY TO HAVE THEM!!!
(Some unsolicited advice for you Paxil people - talk to your doctor about Serzone. All the Paxil goodness without the sexual side effects! :eek: )
This thread has been very enlightening for me. My brother is bipolar, but the majority of the time he is severely depressed (the manic episodes are rare). He was on Prozac for about three years, and it helped him tremendously. Then at some point, while he was in the Army, he was unable to renew his prescription. He was in Arizona at the time; we didn’t hear from him for about four months, and then he came home - he was thrown out for drug abuse. He’s spent the past year fighting a serious addiction to opiate drugs. It was only when he went back on anti-depressants (I can’t remember which one) that he was able to completely stop his opiate addiction, go back to school, get his life back on track and be happy.
As much as we’ve talked and as much as I’ve tried to understand what depression feels like, this thread is the closest I’ve come to understanding.
I’ve sometimes wondered if I don’t need anti-depressants, but usually my depression is related to a certain event (like Sept 11 - I was a mess for two weeks after). Count me in the “experiancing my emotions” camp - I’ve never been so out of control emotionally that I haven’t been able to function normally, and I don’t mind riding the roller coaster emotions when they come along. Most of the time, though, I’m in a genuine state of happiness and I’m content. After reading all this I feel blessed that I was spared, but I’m still very sad that my brother has to deal with it.
Many thanks to everyone for being so honest and up-front.
IANAD, but that sounds about right. Having the depression lifted from my head made everything easier. The bad stuff was doable, and the good stuff wasn’t a shock–you know, that “what do you mean, something good is happening to me? Riiiiiiiight. Like I actually deserve it” feeling.
My psychologist also thinks that maybe I’ve been depressed a lot longer than I ever thought I was. I have epilepsy, an I’ve been taking medications for it for almost 20 years. Several of the anti-convulsants I’ve taken over the years are now being used as anti-depressants as well. It’s an intersting thought, but there’s no real way to tell. I just know that I’ve been depressed for a long damn time, and now, it’s better. Yay!
As am I, though I don’t believe I made any of those comments. I know that some people truly need these drugs (including my father-in-law), but I also know people who ask to get proscribed them so they’ll feel happier. They’ll pop them when they’re in a light funk, the sort of funk everyone gets into from time to time.
Damn straight!! Celexa is my fluffy friend. My husband is on Effexor too. Well that and a bunch of other pills for his headaches, seizures, blah blah blah. Its kinda funny when one of us gets all bitchy and mean. Our first response is “DID YOU TAKE YOUR PILLS!!!” Then one of us will reply…“Uhm…no I forgot”. Celexa keeps me from crying and feeling like everyone hates me.
Thank you all for sharing your insights. I am just starting to think of depression as an actual illness rather than a state of mind. I consider myself to have been severely depressed when I was 12-13: suicide wishes, Nirvana, Samuel Taylor Coleridge, the works, but when some better changes in my life took place I was able to pull myself out of it by myself. Every once in a while I slip back, but luckily I am the kind of person that feels better by thinking thoughts like “so many people have it worse than you”, spending time with friends and family, reasoning my way through it, etc. So please consider that some people have tried this kind of thing and it worked for them; we’re not all just insensitive assholes.
That being said, I now know a few people that I think could really benefit from taking drugs like these, that can’t just “snap out of it” no matter how hard other friends and I have tried to help. Can you guys suggest a way for me to talk to them about it without making it sound like I think they’re nuts? One guy in particular is a tough nut to crack - he comes from a very strict, traditional Indian family and I know taking antidepressants would be a source of shame for him. He keeps insisting that if he works harder and pleases his parents more, everything will work out fine. Unfortunately, he’s trying to get into med school (everyone knows he really wants to be an engineer, but it will make his parents happy, so he thinks he’s got to do it) and wants to be a psychiatrist. So he’ll have to spend the rest of his life listening to other people’s problems, poor guy!
Well I certainly agree with what’s been said. A couple different anti-depressants pulled me out of some deep funk after I was uprooted years ago (they switched me a couple times cause they thought one was keeping me awake and another was making me anorexic [hah…i knew i was skinny as hell and not in a good way])…I eventually stopped taking them and was fine since…
Until now. In high school I would go to sleep at 3-5am most of the time and wake up to drive to school and would never get there more than an hour late, usually 10-20 minutes… Now I can’t make a single class consistently except for my noon chem lab and even other classes I have other days at 1:30 I usually wake up in time for but just can’t make myself go… I know this isn’t uncommon among college students…but what is there to do? I’ve got some social issues too but nothing that I would attribute to the kind of depression I had before. Anybody had similiar trouble and get through it? I’d like to get to my classes some time…whats the point of paying all this money if I just learn everything from a book? Plus I worry what will happen when i get a job… I’m really not sure if I’ll get up for it.
In retrospect I feel stupid for posting this…but i spent a while typing it so I’m gonna post it anyway and just hope i don’t look like a goof.
Depression is a disease. Theres a big difference between being “sad” and being depressed. In highschool I was “sad” alot of the time. I moped around school and everywhere. Three years ago it got horribly worse. I started crying for no reason and suicide plagued me constantly. Anti-depressants helped me. But do know that drugs are not always the answer. Try different things before hopping on the drug wagon.
Don’t be discouraged when you can’t help a friend who is depressed. I lost a lot of friends when I was depressed. Some of them I gave up because of their attitude towards my illness. They were the ones who told me to “just cheer up” or “I’m sick of you being sad all the time, You’re no fun!”
Do realize people who are depressed aren’t theirselves. Their worlds are distorted into pits of despair, and agony.
I’d like to thank all of you for giving me more ways to talk to a friend of mine. I adore him, he’s brilliant, witty, kind, creative, etc… and obviously depressed in the “victim of depression” sort of way. He’ll come to me and ask me to talk him out of it. I’ve been trying to talk him into at least trying some professional help, maybe even a few drugs becuase I know that this malaise isn’t him. It isn’t who he really is and I can get very angry about it. (I hate it when anything hurts one of my friends.)
And he’s resistant. He wants to be strong. Combat with happy thoughts. Have Medea give him inspiration again, anything but admit a chemical problem.
This thread has given me more ammo.
Personally, I can be prone to “funks” or situational depressions. I don’t snap out of them, but I do heal from them and go on. It works for me. Kaje, I was like that last year and about all I could do was force myself to do as much as I could. I tried to focus on functionality. “Yea, I feel like crap but I can feel like crap in my room, or I can feel like crap in class, since the difference in negliable I should just go.” I focused on attending class as a goal. (ignoring actually doing well for the most part.) Butt in seat. Notebook open. I drew pictures. Some classes I attented I spent the whole hour writing stories instead of doing work. But I made it to class. Once it gets habitual you can work on the next problem. I broke every goal down into little steps. I forced myself to do something productive every day. “Today I will do laundry. Tomorrow I will read one chapter of that book. Sunday I will write a letter to my mom.” I took care of myself anyway, even when I didn’t deserve it. I took myself out for painting pottery, decent food, fun stuff, even when I knew I didn’t deserve it. It worked okay. And this year, I’m fantastic. I’m stressed, but I’m capable. I feel good this year! The two may not be related, but one can hope.
Hello Dopers,
I’m new here and i enjoy reading everyones thoughts on a wide variety of topics. I got a question about depression tho, Everyone in this thread talks about how it alters their lifes and all but it seems they had time somewhere in their lifes to date and relate to another fellow human and form relationships, but not me, why? I dont know if ive been depressed my whole life or not but ive never held a realtionship that didnt involve a drug (mainly alcohol) or money. What i mean to say is the few times i was involved with someone in my view they was using me for what little i could offer them at the time. I deal everday with what i always thought were normal feelings, see im so shy i cant get past my insecurities to really accomplish anything. I know everyone is going to say go see a doctor or something but that is something i cant do cuz i have no insurance or money ( i got fired a couple months back cuz i missed 3 days of work cuz i didnt get out of bed) anyways…really all i guess im looking for is words of encouragement here on this board as i have no friends to help me with my sad place in life. I’m sorry if i sound like a total loser looking for pity but… aw shit i guess thats what i am. They say laughter is the best medecine and thats the only one ive ever been on but it isnt working. Oh well i guess most on here cant relate to me but if you can please reply k?
First of all, welcome to the Boards, Solitaire.
Second of all, I have no idea how American medicine works, but if you need medication, there should be some way to get it (a Mental Health society that works with low-income people? Something like that? American dopers, any input on this?).
Third, if socializing isn’t your strong suit, this board (or one of the many others out there) might help a little with that. This is a community, even if it isn’t a face-to-face one, and you can build relationships within this community. Hope that helps somewhat :).
(Sorry, eirroc, I don’t think it helps with the weight either (judging from my poochy belly) :D.)
I have no money either. Get proof of residence, income, expenses and a doctor’s note saying that you cannot work due to clinical depression. Take all this to your county’s welfare office and apply for SSD. My shrink still hasn’t found the right mix of pills. But, in the meantime the government gives me money for rent every month, a card that buys groceries, and full coverage no money out of my pocket ever medical insurance. The program is deliberately difficult to get into. All aplicants are rejected the first time they try. Intake interviews are done by sadistic, tyrant bureacrats. But, once you are accepted, the program is low maintanance( once or twice a year interviews) and is literally a lifesaver.
solitaire40, don’t feel like a loser, there are other people like you out there, and the way to find them, if you’re shy, is in Internet Chat Rooms. You can meet people who share your interests or your problems and who will be up at all hours of the night to talk to you and listen. I’ve met a lot of people this way and although some of them turned out to be freaks, I made a very close friend as well, and had a lot of fun. It can be hard to maintain relationships or friendships because your personality changes somewhat when you are depressed. Some people are just lucky in that their friends are sympathetic to depression and understand that when you are depressed you may act selfishly without realising it.
I would also advise you to follow Medea’s Child’s example and try to focus on one little thing at a time. Try to think of things which might motivate you to get out of the house or go to work. If there is anything which makes you feel better, try to force yourself to do it regularly. Following a set routine can help distract you from your problems. It also helps if you can get a job which you like, even if it pays less than one which you wouldn’t like as much. I realise that’s easier said than done, of course. Anyway, good luck…
That’s not denying the reality of clinical depression - it’s about the English language. It’s perfectly legitimate for me to say, “I’m feeling quite depressed today,” even though I’m not afflicted by clinical depression.
So we’ve got the same word - depression - applying to two superficially similar, but fundamentally different, conditions: the passing mood and the ongoing chemical imbalance.
Of course people are going to get confused; I’d say don’t be too hard on them, but educate 'em.
That’s because people like to think that things that they are fortunate enough to have effortlessly – like good mental health or functional knees – are the result of some virtue on their part rather than the genetic luck of the draw. It makes them feel superior to imply that others are just too weak to get what they have. Assholes indeed.
I haven’t found anything remotely resembling peace or happiness yet. But neurontin, wellbutrin and risperdal at least keep me from killing myself or anyone else.
Well, I’ve been off of my prozac for a little bit over a week now, because I can’t afford to get my prescription filled right now, and I’ll tell you what…I’m starting to get an idea of how much of a difference it was making.
I’m back to near non-functionality sometimes and manic cleaning spurts others. It’s exhausting me (yet again). Fortunately my mother had some extra prozac and she is sending it to me to tide me over until I can get my prescription filled.
Yeah, a crutch. Yeah, the first month since I can remember that I didn’t feel like the whole world was about to come down on my head. sigh
Fortunately no one’s been anything but supportive this week.
It pisses me off when I hear inconsiderate unempathic assholes talk about depression not being real; or depressed people being weak, whining complainers; or anti-depressants being “crutches” and so on.
I don’t suffer from clinical depression - but my sister did. She suffered from it for 17 years. She tried everything BUT drugs because she listened to well-meaning types who had no clue what the drugs did, or were for. After 17 years in the Pit she took her own life.
SO, YES, YOU INCONSIDERATE ASSHOLES DEPRESSION IS A REAL DISEASE AND IT CAN BE FATAL!!!
So… those of you who find you need a pill to restore yourself to funtional brain chemistry… please do what you need to do to keep yourself healthy.
After my sister died, for the first week I had just two goals every day. 1 - get out of bed. 2 - get dressed. I didn’t always make it to #2. I thought, my god, is this what her life was like for all those years? I think I’d want to die, too!
Big difference, though, is that my “depression”, being normal grief, lifted with time. Hers did not.