Public art is for the public, dickweasels!

The BBQ Pit
1

Recently, the city of Houston launched its [http://“http://www.chron.com/cs/CDA/story.hts/front/1042616”]Cow Parade in order to raise money for Texas Children’s Hospital. These sculptures are scattered all over town, and the ones I’ve seen are quite beautiful and creative.

Today, the local TV news carried a report of a stolen cow. Now, these cows aren’t small. They’re almost the size of a full-grown cow. I cannot, for the life of me, imagine why anyone would want to steal one of these, since they’re here for the public’s benefit.

So listen up, asselves! That sculpture was designed and painted so we can have something besides road construction to look at. What do you hope to gain by stealing it besides the wrath of the city and maybe some jail time? Or did the liquor you troglodytes fortified yourselves with numb you to that possibility? And when the show’s over, that sculpture is supposed to be auctioned off to benefit the children’s hospital. You just took medical care away from a KID, you stupid, selfish fuckheads!

Actually, this rant does have a happy ending. The Chronicle link above says that a couple of Sigma Nu fraternity brothers found the cow, took it to their apartment, called the police, and offered the services of Sigma Nu to keep an eye out for the sculptures to make sure no more are taken. (Although I’m willing to bet the cow was stolen by a couple other drunken frat-rats.)

But the rest of the rant still stands.

Robin

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Let’s try this again. Houston Cow Parade

And I’ll preview this time :wink:

Robin

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I think it could all be smoothed over if the criminals just went up to the torch wielding mob and said

“Murderous mob, I beg you to spare our lives, at least until you’ve heard the story of how we ended up with the cow of our beloved Kate Riley-Lumley.”
Mob: How long will this story take?
“Uh… About twenty-three minutes and five seconds.”

Twenty two minutes later…

"If you still want to tear apart this young felon as he stands on the brink of salvation, I await your wrath. But I’d like to add one thing. It wasn’t until after I’d removed that beautiful bovine that we realized we were taking our artwork for granted. That’s a crime, too. One I think we are all guilty of.’’

The thought of this scene alone mooooved me to tears of passion. I feel it is the only salvation left for this young hoodlam. I can only hope he reads this post, and feels udderly ashamed at himself. Come clean now, young hoodlam.