LONDON (AP) - A tabloid reporter’s tale of working undercover as a Buckingham Palace footman has deeply shocked British commentators. That wallpaper! That Tupperware and plastic yoghurt pot on Her Majesty’s breakfast table! That “eat, drink and remarry” pillow in Prince Andrew’s sitting room! Thursday’s newspapers had plenty of comment on the style - or lack of it - inside the palace. Never mind the security implications of servants being hired despite giving false references. “Have you seen that wallpaper?” Andrew Anthony wrote in The Guardian. “To gaze at the red and pink flock paper that adorns the walls of Prince Andrew’s bedroom is to be transported back to 1973 in the unused upstairs room of your local pub where tuneless rock bands used to practice,” Anthony wrote.
This week’s stories weren’t as damaging as years of coverage of the Charles and Diana marriage, or the photos of a topless Duchess of York, or the recent kerfuffle over the unpublished rumor so firmly denied by Prince Charles. But as the nation contemplated the wallpaper, the mystique of the monarchy died a little bit more. It was all so suburban, so yesterday. “Chief among the victims were the Earl and Countess of Wessex (Prince Edward and his wife, Sophie), who - it is now known - share their bedroom at the palace with a wooden wall unit and like to adorn their bed with furry bears and dogs,” The Daily Telegraph said. The Daily Mail annotated a photo of a royal breakfast table, noting the adjustable lamp (“circa 1975”), the plastic containers of cereal, the pot of yoghurt, the portable radio and the “old-fashioned telephone.”
—What a great idea for a Xmas special: turn the Fab 5 loose on Buckingham Palace! Carson can get the Queen out of those dowdy frocks and into some kicky Stella McCartneys; Thom can knock himself out redecorating; Kyan can explain the concept of “makeup” to Princess Anne . . .