An old BF called his steel 6 string his basic guitar. He also had a Dobro, a classical, and a 12 string.
That said, I’m guessing DAK was refering to a classical and was, well… a dumb ass-kid. The :wally.
My husband refers to someone who has died, as in a news story etc, as having “Bit the farm” I guess they die from dirt inhalation!
Um, yeah . . . doesn’t everyone?
My coworker’s daughter asked “Is the President the President of, like, the whole world?”
She’s 21, but quit high school to get a jump start on starting her family. Note to others planning this: it’s very hard to get all the different baby daddies to pick all the kids up on the same weekend so you can party.
I’ve always called them inny’s and exie’s. shrug Never heard anyone call them anything else.
Um, sorry for this major hijack of your thread I seem to have caused tdn
My fave is the cashier question when I place a cuppa joe and a sammitch on the counter of the local stop n’ slop.
Cashier: Is that everything?
Me: (to myself) NO! This is what I want to buy, now. Everything is the entire contents of the store, which I don’t need and can’t afford. If I wanted something else, I’d ask for it. Jeez!
Reminds me of the sign at Souplantation (a buffet restaurant, known by other names in some areas) that says “Please consume all food on the premises.”
When a host/hostess asks about our “smoking preference,” I say, “We prefer not to smoke.”
“NPC, will you please go ‘huh’?”
I’ve been playing guitar for 25 years and I have no idea what he was talking about.
I must not be very good either.
A lot of times there are things that the cashier has to get for you from behind the counter (like cigarettes or a lotto ticket or something) or I have a question or need some help from the cashier, so I like it when they ask that, so I don’t have to wait for them to ring everything up, hit “total” then have me add something else.
At my local Waldbaums (or is it Stop 'n Shop?) they make all the cashiers say “Did you find everything you were looking for today?” It’s possible your cashier has no choice in the matter.
We moved to Puerto Rico a few years ago and my sister called shortly after we arrived. Our conversation:
Her: So, how do you like it? What’s it like?
Me: I’m going to have to brush up on my Spanish.
Her: They speak Spanish there?
Me: …
(It gets worse.)
Her: I thought they spoke Mexican?
:smack:
When I called to schedule my physical the year I turned 40:
"Mrs. smartini, would you like a sigmoidoscopy with this exam?"
Huh?
I had one just this very morning.
We’ve had problems with our oven, so I called the suppliers to see about getting a serviceman out to check it out. The woman on the phone claimed she couldn’t help me without the product number, did I have it.
‘No’ I did not.
Was I with the oven now?
‘No, I’m at work, so… can’t I give you the warranty number?’
‘Yes you can, but it won’t help, you’ll need to check the oven for the product number. It’s inside the oven…’
‘Ok ,I’ll check it and get back to you, but before I go, where inside the oven is it specifically?’ (y’know, so I’m not looking all over the place).
‘It’s inside the oven.’
‘Yes, but where?’
‘Inside the oven.’
‘Yes, which wall is it on?’
‘Not the wall, inside the oven.’
‘Ok, I’m looking in the oven, where do I see the number?’
‘Inside, inside the oven.’
‘Is it on the back wall?’
‘No, not the wall, inside the oven, opposite the door.’
‘So it’s on the back wall of the oven.’
‘No, not the wall, inside the oven.’
‘On the back wall?’
‘No, inside the oven.’
‘Opposite the door?’
‘Yes, inside the oven.’
‘On the back wall of the oven.’
‘No, not the wall inside the oven’
‘Which wall of the inside of the oven is the information on? Is it the back wall?’
‘No, inside the oven’
‘Opposite the door’
‘Yes’
‘…on the back wall of the oven’
‘No, inside the oven’
‘Opposite the door?’
‘Yes…’
‘…on the back wall of the oven’
‘No, opposite the door’
‘That would be on the back wall.’
‘Yes!’
‘uh…’
I hung up then.
But was the number inside the oven or on the wall?
::ducks::
what an apt handle, Smartini
At one grocery store I worked at, the store accountant was heard to say, “Who’s name tag is this?”
“Did you survive the accident?”
So, I’m at the YMCA, looking for a Y staff member to show me how to use the new-fangled elliptical trainer gizmo. None could be found in the fitness center, or basketball gym, or free weight room, so I asked the Guy at the admissions desk.
Me: Hi. Are there any staff around to help with the exercise equipment?
Guy: You mean, people?
Me: Yes. People, humans, employees, persons…
Guy: Are there any in the fitness center?
M:: No, I haven’t seen any today.
Guy: Well, there’s supposed to be someone in there.
Me: Um, I couldn’t find anyone.
Guy: They wear red shirts. Do you know what that looks like?
Me: Okay, I know what a shirt is, and I know what red looks like (was he asking whether I was colorblind?), but, no, I did not see any staff members wearing red shirts.
Guy: Okay, well… I’ll go look (walks to fitness center, looks around).
Me: Maybe they’re on break? (Maybe he could buzz the employee smoking lounge?)
Guy: (Looks around) huh. I don’t see anyone either.
Just then, Mr. Telius (a private personal trainer who happened to be working out there that day and who was not foolish) stepped up and offered to help. Yeah. That’s what I’m talking about.
The thing is, the Guy was completely polite the entire time, or else he would have gotten a bigger whuppin of snarky right back. And he didn’t otherwise seem to be of sub-average intelligence. I probably just rendered him stupid with my blinding beauty.
P.S. I’d change my User Name to whuppin of snarky, but that’s just asking for it.