I mean, right now.
On the right, the cheap-o printer that I use only for personal affairs. (If I need a high-quality copy, I use the one at work—another story).
Also at the right, a picture of me and my S.O. with her holding her nephew / godson. And of course the mouse.
To the left of the monitor is the new Steely Dan CD Everything Must Go. Highly recommended.
Then a piece of paper with random scratchings on it and a calculator sitting on top of it.
O.K., Next?
Alot of stuff on my desk. Also real easy to tell what I do for a living.
To the left is:
my phone
a spindle of CDs (mostly old driver disks that I should get rid of).
Printed emails that my boss thought I really needed to see (I got them in email too)
a case of useful CDs (Win XP, Blackberry Install, 2KCD, etc)
my performance review from last year that I need to go over because I have another in a few months
Stack of magazines to read while waiting for file copies
2 empty boxes that held new 70GB SCSI drives for a RAID I am working on.
On the right:
Motivational day calendar. Todays quote - Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood. -Marie Curie
Directions I have to finish on how to install a blackberry for our network configuration
2 spacers for the RAID from when I installed the drives.
2 empty anti-static bags the drives came in.
4 floppy disks - 98 boot, Program that will read/write NTFS from DOS, NTFS repair program for DOS, and a bootable password reset floppy for NT/2K/XP. Guess what I had to do today?
Clipboard with paper. Only thing writen on it is 50’ 4x3’
Aprox. 25’ of cat5 cable.
XP Service Pack 1 CD
hmm … Old lamp; several files which need putting in the cabinet; pencil sharpener; quadrangle maps; reference books …
This place is a wreck !!!
Such a mess.
Other than computer components: Cellphone, clock, tv, vcr, dvd player, television, two plastic cups, a bunch of papers, bills to pay, two telephones, a gaussian nightmare of electrical cords, a few dvds, some gum, a voltmeter, nozzle for a blowtorch, a couple flight manuals.
Maybe I should clean up. At least it is a big desk.
Dead hooker.
Why?
One box SoBe adrenaline rush cans,
Box of tea bags,
Remote control 1/72 scale tank,
Chinese medicine balls,
Various work related books and papers,
random pens and stationary…
Bauhaus: Crackle cd, Low: Trust cd.
Computer components, plastic cup full of Diet Pepsi, pen, Chapstick, water bottle, wallet, three pennies, a random store receipt, and oodles of health insurance paperwork.
A 12 inch “KISS ALIVE” Gene Simmons figure!
My wife hates it.
On the left:
printer;
pile of envelopes;
bottle of rubbing alcohol;
binder with some sort of manual printout;
bunch of blank CDs;
pile of scrap paper;
glass of iced tea
On the right:
headphones;
container of anti-static wipes;
box containing “Mavis Beacon Teaches Typing” program (gift from Gramma to kids two years ago, still unopened )
container full of floppies;
more blank CDs;
CD shelves full of system CDs, games & whatnot;
big lazy-susan-type pen & pencil holder thingy
Boring. No dead bodies, no drugs, no alcohol. The no-alcohol part will be remedied shortly, however.
Hmm.
On the keyboard shelf: one keyboard, one mouse, one mouse pad, one unopened MiniDisc, one small plastic holder for MiniDiscs.
On the main shelf: Two speakers, two (empty) cartons of Cadbury mini-eggs (one caramel, one creme), some batteries, a wooden puzzle cube in pieces, a headband, assorted scratch paper, a pen, a marking pen, a small tube of lotion, and some MiniDiscs.
On the wire shelf: QuickCam, Boss’s Head (from Dilbert) that says stuff when you slam it against something, pile of assorted CD’s and game manuals.
Top shelf: Printer, mug of pens, calendar, small CD rack, sunglasses.
And dust. 
<< Let not the sands of time get in your lunch. >>
Left:
Sim City 4 & Championship Manager 4 (games, sitting on top of PC tower)
Palm recharging dock (my girlfriend’s)
Sony digital camera 3.5" memory stick floppy disk adaptor
Straight ahead:
Apple iPod Firewire recharging/transfer dock
PC keyboard & flat-screen monitor
Right:
Fruit bowl currently containing three bulbs of garlic and one notepad
Rothman’s Football Yearbook 2003/2004
Hot-swappable floppy disk drive for an aging laptop (girlfriend’s)
Notepad
Packet of mentholated cough sweets
Three candles in a slightly tacky display tray
Glass of Australian wine (Brown Brothers’ Tarrango, if you must know)
Box of tissues
iPod
Nokia 8310e mobile phone (battery half full)
Remote control for the Telewest digital cable TV box
Today’s washing up, currently drying (I ain’t listing that!)
Left to right: [ul][]P3 tower system, assembled myself[]bunch o’ junk[]left speaker[]IBM keyboard[]behind keyboard: old desktop case (now serving as a monitor stand), on top of which is a 15" Sony Trinitron Multiscan E100, various game manuals, and a small slinky[]right speaker[]IBM optical mouse[]standard mouse[]bunch more junk[]book of baseball statistics, which serves as an arm rest when not being perused[]four-port KVM switch with one (faulty) port open[]HP printercheap empty CD rack for our 'tiels to perch on[/ul]
Oh, and atop the P3: an old Emerson clock/radio/B&W TV with a digital cable hookup.
Uh…
huge box of pens/markers/pencils, paper, crayons, sippies, mail, magazines, an easter basket, lamp, kite, lots of books, a few stacks of cds and two spindles of blanks, werthers candies, a ceramic train, wacom tablet, speakers, picture frames, spare wrist braces. a small safe, phone, cards and related mailing supplies.
6 empty beer cans, an expired certificate for $25 to a local restaurant given to me by my kids, 10-15 lottery tickets, unchecked for winnings, an overdue bill for a storage locker that I maintain, why I don’t know, a “timer” which calls me back to the real world when I remember to set it, notes to myself, which seldom get read.
Why don’t you ask me what is lying on the floor around my desk? 
Wow. You guys have big desks. Mine is tiny, but can still fit a fishtank and a betta hex, both currently empty, a tiny phillips’ head screwdriver, a pen, a magic marker (red), a cassette for a mini-dv camcorder, a “Bush Quayle '88” button (it went with my Dukakis button, but I lost that), my collection of Homies™, a little wooden Buddha, a plastic Saruman from Burger King™, and my Ringo Starr action figure. Oh, and a coke. And Kleenex™.
(Yes, I just discovered the Character Map on my computer. What’s it to you?)
Apart from 'puter paraphernalia ('puter, printer, scanner, CD-Roms, etc.) a a fluffy kiwi toy from New Zealand, a maths book and 1 of a set of enclyclopedias from 1931 (very interesting entry on Adolf Hitler).
Ahh, I’m such a sucker for all this random trivia stuff. One person’s boring mundane details is another’s treasure trove of juicy facts. Alas, there is not much of interest on my desk at the moment, but I’ll do my best…
er, that should be “jolly” pirate ship- in case you were intrigued
Add to that a giant spider. J H C It’s about the size of my effing hand!!!