With all the talk about funding the SDMB, I have an idea for a completely different payment scheme.
All access to the boards will be free, but any member can pay to have another member banned. The member to be banned then must either cough up an equal amount of money to the board, or else they will in fact be banned. Imagine the beautious chaos such a scheme would create 
Excellent idea. I was just thinking the boards could use some class conflict. This idea would allow the richer (aka “better”) Dopers to rule over the underclass with an iron fist, silencing any opinions which displease them while they dispense the wisdom that only comes with having money.
I predict a new golden age would immediately flourish, and the SDMB would be held up across the Internet as a model for civilized discourse.
I know SDMB payment is a big issue but all these damn threads about it? It’s like a bad dream!
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SHUT UP!
Who is that firebrand, Smithers?
Lobsang whoooshhhh, this is a joke thread linked ever so slightly to the SDMB news. Its here precisely because too many people are getting too uptight about the issue.
Hmmm…that system sounds vaguely familiar…
Well, we can allow the plebians to lurk, just so long as they don’t post unless posted to. Maybe a little protection racket could be set up to generate money from the middle classes so long as they are favorable to the cause.
“Paradigm.”
Sorry, that was driving me nuts. Please don’t pay anyone to ban me, I don’t have enough money to fight it.
So now I can make you pay for those tart asides and perfectly timed one liners? And how you will pay… and pay!!
pwn3d!!!11!!111
I was thinking of a variant of this. Each poster would be given a certain number of positive and negative votes per year. Each vote would raise/lower another poster’s subscription rate by a dollar. So if you’re a universally beloved poster, the board would be free. And if you’re a wretched, contentious, borderline-troll, one-trick-pony, you’d have to pay through the nose for your amusement. I don’t think this scheme would particularly punish those who hold specific political/religious viewpoints because there are usually enough folks on either side of the issue to keep things relatively balanced. And because you’d only have a certain number of votes, you probably wouldn’t waste them on someone who’s views are merely unpopular – you’d save it for the real toxic posters.
I’m not actually suggesting this – it just sort of amused me to wonder what the consequences would be.
Giraffe, you fail to understand how the system works. A few of those that cannot afford to be picked on may suffer as first, but once it is determined where the “deep pockets” are those posters will be the ones that subsidize the boards.
What we actually need is a super premium membership (only $99.95). SPMs can have huge manga-esque avatars (preferably animated, with a talking sig line, too).
SPMs will be required to have at least one sock and trolling will be encouraged. Only SPMs will be allowed to edit their own posts. Insulting other members will be required in GD and they cannot, under any circustances be banned.
You’re still sore about that time I got to King Nifty a few milliseconds faster, aren’t you?
Oh, I see. If that’s the case, I no longer support the OP’s idea. I don’t want to live in a world where the rich don’t drive the poor before them like sheep to the slaughter.
You’ll have to forgive me. Much to my embarrasment my sarcasm detector seems to be broken. (or maybe it only works after 11pm. I don’t know)
Maybe it’s a “parody” parodym/paradigm?
GD! But I am in with the big dogs!
Here I am with under 50 posts and I don’t think a single one of you had under 1,000!
Oh well.
+1 and counting…
Eat us! Sautéed or barbequed! Eat us! We once were pets but now we’re food.