I was driving around noon CST and listening to ‘Day to Day’ on NPR. One of NPR’s reporters was on one of the hurricane-chasing planes.
Typical questions. Typical answers. Then the stupidity happens.
Anchor: As people, we have a tendency to give these monstrous storms an animalistic aspect. Is there any sort of will or intent behind these hurricanes?
Reporter: Umm…no. That’s the stuff of science fiction.
I mean, come the fuck on. Are you telling me that you honestly thought there was some sort of brain in there thinking Gulfport? Nah. Nawlens? Maybe. Galveston? Hmmm…Wait, no, Nawlens again. HHAHAHAAHAHAHA! I’m an eeeeeeeevil storm. Look at me, mom! I’m taking these fuckers out! Woooo!
Hey dipshit, you do realize that you’re on national news, right?
“Day To Day” is on the B-list of NPR shows. That’s why the station where I work doesn’t carry it. You’re bound to hear stuff like that on it. The guy is on national radio in selected markets where they can’t afford “Talk Of The Nation” or another, better show.
Anchor: Yes, all the available data indicates that this is an evil liberal environmentalist hurricane that is attacking us with the specific goals of making global warming more credible, making the President look bad, and making us want to reclaim the swamps south of New Orleans. Katrina: what a BITCH!
This past week, I had to get up earlier than usual for work and was dismayed to find that 940 News, which I normally listen to in the shower for traffic, weather and headlines, picks up the feed from some truly bizarre Jesus-loving conspiracy-believing overnight show from (I gather) South Dipshit, Arizona. I happened to tune in at a moment when the host was speaking seriously about SETI wavelengths and thought “Hmmm, this is pretty advanced for a radio science show”, but then he started taking calls from people who spoke earnestly of, among other topics, the “Cereans” (not Syrians, as I initially and bemusedly assumed) bombarding our atmosphere with water to offset the greenhouse effect and we’d better take heed before it’s too late, and so forth.
[Devil’s Advocate]Not having heard the show, perhaps the questioner was trying to dispel ignorance that may have been in his audience. Something more along the lines of a “Some idiots believe these things are a malevolent force. Please dispel their ignorance” type of question.[/Devil’s Advocate]
Man, I sure wish I’d heard that and been able to call in! I’ve been wondering for a few weeks now why we can’t just shoot an ICBM into the storm to get it to dissipate somewhat.
What, not possible? Why yes, I did have the Natural Science class taught by the wrestling coach, why do you ask?
That would tend to be my interpretation, as well. That’s a leading question, with a predictable answer. They asked it because they knew what the answer would be.
That’s also how I interpreted it. It seems very likely to me that the anchor had heard other people (even other news-people) anthropomorphizing the storm, and he was wanting to put that idea to rest. However, the anchor’s not allowed to say, “Of course, any fool knows that storms can’t think.” So he did the only thing he IS allowed to do: he asked the reporter, “So, can storms think?” allowing the reporter to say what he wanted to say.
“North Korea, you’re on a peninsula, right? Oceans on both sides if I recall correctly. That’s a pretty vulnerable spot. I’m not threatening you or anything, I’m just saying…”
Pshaw–as if our government isn’t in the hands of Red China already! Why would our secret masters want to risk bad weather near their shores? Why, I heard the other day that Peking has been experiencing a lovely summer. What more proof do you need?
