“Smokey Mountain Rattlesnake Retreat.” And that’s a great pick–I love that one, too! Incidentally, my first two faves listed come from the same album as yours–Surely You Joust.
Correct–and it was enhanced as only Ray could do it, with interjections of Sweet Sue’s reactions to Salty Sam and his stunts! Great comedy!
IIRC, the b-side of “Shriner’s Convention” was something called “You Ain’t going to Tampa With Me.”
Am I the only one who remembers “I Need Your Help, Barry Manilow”?
Oh, man, I grew up with my friend’s copy of “Gitarzan”! Nabbed my own at a Value Village a few years ago. 
Hug and kiss me all ya wanna, while we’re in Daytona
But you’re never going to Tampa with me!"
“The Pirate Song” is another that my family lip-synched to (I wasn’t part of this one). My tall skinny brother played the part of the reluctant pirate, with Dad as Long John Blackbeard Peg-Leg Patch-Eye Hook, Last Scourge of the London Main. They recruited some men from church to play the other pirates–burly men who surprisingly shed their inhibitions to do the “song and dance” at the end of the song. I never got to see them perform this, but I heard they were a hit!
“Doctor, Doctor” is another fave. I love this part:
*"‘Strip down, nekkid boy, cough and sneeze!
Jump up there on that table on your hands and knees!’
Now there’s not another person in the world we’d do that for!
But we just jump on up there like a cocker spaniel
Like it’s written somewhere in some sacred manual
You do everything the doctor tells you,
Who do they think they are?!"*
Looking back over my posts, I think I’ve had FAR too much time on my hands. This is no where near a comprehensive list of all the Ray Stevens songs I love!
I think this is the one I came in here to post! Is it the one that goes,
“I want to sing and dance
I want to sing and dance
I wanna be a pirate like the Pirates of Penzance
In me silver-buckled slippers and me tight shiny pants
I want to sing and daaaaaaance!”
I haven’t heard that one in a million years.
As a 9 year resident of the sleepy burg of Moss Point, MS and a 6 year worker in Pascagoula, I am compelled to share The Mississippi Squirrel Revival
Everybody knew the chorus:
The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula
It was a fight for survival that broke out in revival
They were jumpin’ pews and shoutin’ Hallelujah!
And then he graaabbed her!
(“Help, he grabbed me!”)
And then he tiiiied her up!
(“Help! He tied me up!”)
That’s so funny that you brought up Ray Stevens! The other night we sat around singing “Ahab the Arab” and “The Streak” and laughing our butts off!!! They sure don’t make 'em like that any more, music was sure fun back then.
“Alley Oop” was by Ray Stevens too, right??
Alley Oop…Oop…Oop…OopOop
I liked one of his “serious” songs Mr. Businessman for the following bit or rhyme
Spending Tuesdays with your harlot
And on Wednesday’s it’s your charlat-
an analyst
He’s high up on your list
Nope. The Hollywood Argyles
Just had to post to this thread - I am also a long-time Ray Stevens fan. Heck, I remember one of the first songs he did was “Jeremiah Peabody’s Polyunsaturated, Quick-Disolving, Fast-Acting, Pleasant-Tasting Green and Purple Pills”.
How about “Freddy Feelgood and His Funky Five”? This is similar to “Gitarzan” in which (thanks to the process of overdubbing) he “sings” 4 of the 5 instruments - bass, trombone, trumpet and drums. For the 5th instrument, Ray played an actual piano. (I suppose it would be very difficult to imitate a piano with your voice).
“Mr Businessman” is a tremendous song. The start of the 1st and 2nd verses are very interesting in that the chord pattern is such that he plays 1 note per chord which results in a descending chromatic run.
It’s almost 3 songs in one. How about that middle part about “Did you see the morning Sun come up today, etc” and that ending with the rock and roll riff played on the guitar? And kunilou the lyrics to that song are fantastic. It’s not everyday that you hear a pop song that uses a phrase such as “spending counterfeit incentives”.
As for 1979’s “I Need Your Help Barry Manilow”, unfortunately it was written by Dale Gonyea and not Mr Stevens. However, Ray did sing it and he did the arrangement which certainly gave the song that “over-produced”, “overly-dramatic” tone for which Mr Manilow has become so (in)famous.
I hope this thread has a long life because I think Ray Stevens is a much-negelcted, underrated musician.
“I Saw Elvis In A UFO”, he was sitting there with Howard Hughes …
Not so fast–like “Along Came Jones,” Stevens covered that on his Gitarzan album…which also includes covers of “Little Egypt,” “Yakety Yak,” and “Mr. Custer.”
Ah, yes, the song that warns about the dangers of going to an unfamiliar barber. “Cause you might look like Larry, Moe, or Curly if a stranger cuts your hair.”
Ballad of the Blue Cyclone.
Some guys just never learn…
“And then he piledrived me right there on the hard concrete!”
Several,
“Sitting up with the dead”
Well I ain’t sittin’ up with the dead no more, I don’t know ‘bout you
I ain’t sittin’ up with the dead no more no matter what ya say or do.
They say the dead can’t hurt ya cause they already left
but what they left can sure make ya hurt yourself.
And I ain’t sittin up with the dead no more since the dead started sittin up too.
“The Hair Cut Song”
*** When you get a haircut, be sure to go back home
When you get a haircut, get a barber you have known
Since you were a little bitty boy sittin’ in a booster chair
Or you might look like Larry, Moe or Curly if a stranger cuts your hair…oh yeah! ***
“The Armchair Quarterback”
Now if you stand and block the screen you may just lose your life and that goes for all thirty friends and the thirty friends’ wives. Then the den falls silent we just need a yard or two. They wouldn’t change that channel now if the Rockett’s came on nude. The announcer agrees with the referee but the den does not at all. And thirty fists are clinched in hate and pound upon the wall. Why any fool could see he made that first down when he dived! If Howard Cosell came in now he’d never get out alive.
I lived for that Gitarzan album in elementary and Jr. High – never could play it enough.
Sir Thanksalot is my contribution:
In days of old
when knights were bold
and Sir Thanksalot of the old round table
He was brave and he was bold
and he was always
willing and able
to run to the rescue of a maiden in distress
of all the knights, why, he was the best
The pride of old Camelot
was Sir Thanksalot
Though Gitarzan has the wonderful:
Plays C and D and he’s working on G
digs C & W and R&B and me and the chimpanzee
agree that one day soon he’ll be a celebrity.
Git 'im Git 'im Git 'im ah
Gitarzan. . .
and I have to throw in:
He’s got a pet monkey
he likes to drunk he
plays boogie woogie
and sound realy funky,
C’mon, your time boy,
let’s hear it for the monkey
Riiiiiiiight Now!
Great stuff!
Right, thanks. I listened to that album until my ears bled in the 80s, but don’t have any idea where it is now – all the moving over the years has been hard on stuff. That’s the same album that has “Southern Air”, right?
“There was a gunrack in the cockpit, it beat all I’ve ever seen”
“Blue Cyclone”… I loved i as a kid because it was about a pro-wrestler.
Although he didn’t write I’m My Own Grandpa, Ray sings the song – you can hear his version here.