Really Bad Encyclopedia Brown Solutions (or Other Kid Lit. Items That Ticked You Off)

[squeegee]

@Nonsuch

Should I be embarrassed to admit I also read Danny Dunn?

Wow, I’d completely forgotten about Danny Dunn. I think I read every one of those books when I was a kid.

[tanstaafl]

Well, since the thread is digressing into other book series, how many ever read Brains Benton or The Mad Scientists Club?

[xizor]

My personal piss-me-off EB solution had to do with eggs. The solution was that EB “proved” an egg was hard boiled and not raw because somebody cleaned it up with a broom and dust pan. That plus a quick wipe with a napkin would have been how I cleaned it up, I could never understand how that proved anything.

[Scarlett67]

@xizor

My personal piss-me-off EB solution had to do with eggs. The solution was that EB “proved” an egg was hard boiled and not raw because somebody cleaned it up with a broom and dust pan. That plus a quick wipe with a napkin would have been how I cleaned it up, I could never understand how that proved anything.

You would clean up a raw egg spill with a broom and dustpan? Yuck.

[MaxTheVool]

@Bricker

Of course I remember them. Scott Corbett’s series of “Trick” books, which started off with “The Lemonade Trick.” Old lady Mrs. Graymalkin gives Kerby and Fenton her son Felix’s old chemistry set. The chemistry set produces magical-type results.

Her car was named Nostradamus, right?
Time to start a general children’s book memories thread. Ahh, Mara, Daughter of the Nile, how I enjoyed you.

[MaxTheVool]

@xizor

My personal piss-me-off EB solution had to do with eggs. The solution was that EB “proved” an egg was hard boiled and not raw because somebody cleaned it up with a broom and dust pan. That plus a quick wipe with a napkin would have been how I cleaned it up, I could never understand how that proved anything.

Wasn’t it kind of like the “narrow flight away”? He said, “I’m going to break this egg”, and the person said “I’ll get the broom”, thus proving he knew it was hardboiled, and only the criminal knew it was hardboiled, or something like that?

[Yorikke]

I was such a little turd in school. I would read… nay DEVOUR these books, and the, when the teacher would read us a story once a week, on Friday afternoon, I’d raise my hand with the solution the MOMENT the ridiculous plot turn took place.

Anyway, the one I remember most hating was one, I think a 2MM, in which the plot hinged on the fact that a criminal referred to San Francisco as “Frisco,” and nobody from there could ever POSSIBLY refer to the city as “Frisco.” Yeah, they don’t like it, but I liver there, and heard it myself. Bastard writers.

George

[NoPretentiousCodename]

Einstein Anderson?

Anyone?

Anyone?

Crickets Chirp

[Netbrian]

@NoPretentiousCodename

Einstein Anderson?

Anyone?

Anyone?

Crickets Chirp

I remember it!

Mildly fondly too. I liked it in third grade, and even then I noted it was a rather blatant rip-off.

[Loach]

@Ukulele Ike

In case a Man Comes Through the Door with a Gun.

In that case I should be facing the door since I’m the one who’s packing heat.

[Morbo]

@wheresgeorge04

Anyway, the one I remember most hating was one, I think a 2MM, in which the plot hinged on the fact that a criminal referred to San Francisco as “Frisco,” and nobody from there could ever POSSIBLY refer to the city as “Frisco.” Yeah, they don’t like it, but I liver there, and heard it myself. Bastard writers.

George

That’s the only one in this thread so far that I agree with. I live in SF, and while I may have heard it, (probably from a tourist or recent resident), I completely agree that if he was from here there’s no way he would say it.

[Scarlett67]

OK, I don’t think I’ve seen anyone mention Mr. S’s favorite from this genre: Brains Benton.

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

[CaveMike]

@tanstaafl

Well, since the thread is digressing into other book series, how many ever read Brains Benton or The Mad Scientists Club?

Yep, I read The Mad Scientists too!

My favorite Great Brain was the one where he didn’t like their teacher, so he got him fired by planting a bottle of liquor in his coat.

As for the OP, chalk me up as another one that immediately thought of the “a narrow escape/an arrow escape” when I read the thread title.

[Fretful_Porpentine]

@Snooooopy

I remember disliking the mystery where Brown fingered the perpetrator because there’s no such thing as a past tense of “misled.” The perpetrator, if memory serves, needed an excuse to go into the garage or something, so he said he was going to look up the past tense of “misled” in the dictionary. Well, if the kid was such a dumbass that he didn’t already know that, then heading to a dictionary would definitely NOT be a sign of criminal intent – it would be a blessed sign that he finally understood how little he knew about English!

I might have to stick up for Sobol on that one because IIRC, the tip-off that the perpetrator was lying wasn’t that he claimed to be looking up the word in the dictionary, it was that he claimed to have found it.

I am astonished that I remember this twenty years later.

[sleeepy2]

@Askia

Bugs stole a valuable coin and hid it in his hotdog. I think the problem was that Bugs used saurkraut and mustard in the wrong order.

Bugs had stolen a valuable penny at some sort of hot dog appreciation festival. The clue was that Bugs had his hot dog with the mustard on top of his sauerkraut, and no hot dog lover would put mustard on top of saurekraut! So clearly, the penny was tucked in the bun, snuggled under sauerkraut, but well safe of that nefarious mustard!

I think I last read that story twenty-five years ago, but it’s still a sore spot with me!

[GRUMBLE] Little punk tell me how to eat my friggin’ hot dog [/GRUMBLE]
I only stuck with these stories 'cause Sally Kimball was a minx.

[Torgo]

Why was Encyclopedia’s dad always eating soup for dinner? Poor schmuck; lays his life on the line every day on the mean streets of Idaville and for what? So he can come home to a loveless marriage, a wiseass son who’s better at his job than he is, and big bowl of lukewarm broth. Nice life you got there, Chief.

[Snooooopy]

@Fretful Porpentine

I might have to stick up for Sobol on that one because IIRC, the tip-off that the perpetrator was lying wasn’t that he claimed to be looking up the word in the dictionary, it was that he claimed to have found it.

That makes a little more sense.

[Scarlett67]

Just found this little tidbit:
The Last Case of Encyclopedia Brown

[bmoak]

@MaxTheVool

Wasn’t it kind of like the “narrow flight away”? He said, “I’m going to break this egg”, and the person said “I’ll get the broom”, thus proving he knew it was hardboiled, and only the criminal knew it was hardboiled, or something like that?

Oddly enough, I remember this story vividly. Encyclopedia was hired by a kid who was the Champeen egg-spinner of Idaville (every kid in Idaville had some singular talent or trait) who was training for the upcoming Big Event. However, there was a New Kid on the egg-spinning scene who came out of nowehere the challenge the Champ’s supremacy.

Encyclopedia observed the New Kid as he showed off his technique at his diner hangout, but knew the jig was up when the egg spun off the counter on the counterman’s side. He couldn’t see the egg, but when the guy said he would get a broom and sweep up the mess, he knew it was a hard-boiled egg, which would spin longer than a regular egg.

[Ranchoth]

@Bricker

Tom would never leave something like that to chance.

Well, there was that rafting business during flood season…