[quote=“Cartooniverse, post:244, topic:790633”]
Absolutely.
The quote in my post up there from our delicate flower SunnyDaze struck me as haughty in the extreme.
We are supposed to make sure she’s not wounded by our posts, or if so apologize?/QUOTE]
has no one in your life ever told you that something you said to or about them was not cool? And you’ve never stopped to think “maybe I shouldn’t have said that?”
I just told Asimovian to stop being such a dick.
The poll results of the parent thread in IMHO suggest this is a very male-dominated board.
Some of the comments posted in response to Sunny Daze’s well-deserved ire imply to me that this is an imbalance we will never correct so long as we don’t get our collective shit together.
Morgenstern: “Not gonna happen. . . .You were whooshed. . . Take a flying fuck at the moon!”
Bobo lesinger: [Banned. ‘Nuff said.]
Rick Sanchez: “Schoolmarmish humourlessness . . .” [“Schoolmarmish!?” Also banned. Finally.]
Emcee2k: “I’m offended!”
Clairobscur: “[How can we possibly be expected to fix this behavior when there are so many more important issues in the world?]”
TriPolar: “. . . some humor that failed. . . You really can’t expect too much . . .” [Well-intentioned placation?]
Strinbean: [Stringbean]
Jimmy Chitwood: “It’s magical thinking to think otherwise [ie, let’s not be quite so prejudiced against bigots, m’kay?]”
**Yezlles **-> covfefe: “[something about rape and hyperbole covfefe . . . ?]”
Octopus: “‘Mansplaining’ used non ironically in a thread about the evils of non human sexists is precious.” [Octopus is offended because he thought this was a pitting of cephalopod sexists?]
Cartooniverse: “1st Amendment . . Free Speech [gives me the right to be an arsehole]!” (“Really guys?” = an attack on free speech? Blimey.)
Kayaker: [*Actually came around to apologizing! * Props.]
[Honorable raised eyebrow to **Richard Parker **for an excessively cerebral explanation of why the frustration of female Dopers is actually counterproductive.]
Indeed.
Sorry you feel that way. I felt throughout this exchange Sunny Daze’s posts were reasonable starting with the initial post in the thread (which came across as calm and measured compared to many
that overall get started in the Pit!). I didn’t think some of Merneith’s rhetoric was reasonable, is all, and strange it would be defended as Pit ranting yet I can’t make the same excuse. Can I please have an honorable raised eyebrow or two instead?
And out of respect to the OP I did make sure to wait until the situation with kayaker and Morgenstern had been resolved before I made a sensationalistic post like that.
Troll and/or sock.
Please explain what it is about what I posted in this thread that supposedly chasing woman away from this board.
Honestly, I have no idea whether your protestation of offence is driving women from this board, but in a thread where a very understandable, yet admirably restrained call for less misogynistic behavior on a male-dominated board is met with comments such as “take a flying fuck at the moon”, I certainly can’t imagine that your bleating about the perceived offensiveness of an ironic term such as “bro-flakes” is presenting a welcoming environment for women posters.
(Pause for breath)
So, maybe put your sense of offence into perspective before venting it?
In light of **madsircool’s **comment, I’m not sure but that maybe I should be giving you a raised Muppet eyebrow. (Think Herry Monster.)
But leaving that aside, I really don’t know what to make of your contribution, other than that your “hyperbole . . . rape . . . power . . . in defense of rationalism” moralizing is not particularly helpful in view of the context of discussion.
Time, place and manner. You stuffed ‘em all up and now you’re wearing a Halloween costume at a board meeting.
Richard Parker and Jimmy Chitwood are two of my favorite posters. I found their posts in this thread eminently reasonable, and I always find them worth listening to and engaging with even when I don’t agree with everything they say.
I think you badly misread my interaction with Sunny Daze. I wouldn’t have thought the original joke was offensive, so I could imagine making some similar comment. However, I try and not be an asshole, so when she said she was offended, had I made the original joke, I would have apologized. Not because she’s shutting down my speech, just because I don’t want to be an asshole and I’d like to know if I have inadvertently offended someone so I can apologize and endeavor not to do it again.
She can’t shut down my speech – this isn’t North Korea (wait, is this North Korea?) and she’s probably not Kim Jong Un anyway. However, I can stop my own speech if I have accidentally offended someone.
There may be times that I would like to offend someone on purpose, like calling you a over-sensitive snowflake poopyhead. I probably wouldn’t apologize for that.
That’s an admirable defense of two chaps who probably didn’t deserve a place on my tut-tut list. I too have enjoyed several of **Richard’s **posts —sorry Jimmy, I’m sure I’ve enjoyed several of your contributions too, but I have a very fuzzy memory (think Elmo)— and I think both posters’ efforts in this thread present them as very reasonable-minded and intelligent people. Assets to this board, to be sure. Heck, I even agree with some of the suggestions they’re making.
However, I felt their contributions in this thread, though well-intentioned I’m sure, to be counter-productive given the topic and context.
Jimmy Chitwood even acknowledged that his argument sounds a lot like a “not all men” argument. Props for self-awareness, but if you can see the similarity then why not just steer clear of it? Especially in a thread with actual sexists dropping deuces in it.
I’ve screwed my nose up at some pretty chauvinistic comments and behavior on this board several times, yet mostly passed them by without remark. I often wonder how such comments might be taken by the female members of our community, and Sunny Daze has offered a clear perspective there.
Can I make a suggestion? Don’t pass them by, say something.
I don’t post much (hardly at all) mostly because my pants aren’t as smarty as most posters here, not because I think there’s much sexism. But it really helps if sexism is called out by men as well as women.
Don’t worry. The coming speech-Nazi uprising clearly won’t affect you since everything you post is gibberish.
Free speech is like the 2nd amendment. It is but it shouldn’t be.
This thread really has become its own kind of Turing test.
Really, if the only female posters I’m driving away are those who can’t be bothered to read every post for comprehension, then good riddance.
So you understand that you are offensive but you’re capable of faking it when the consequences of being offensive would interfere with your self-interest.
Then you go online and let your inner asshole run free. Because you won’t suffer any consequences for offending people on an anonymous message board.
Wake up. This is real life.
The reason people are telling you this here and not in person is because, by your own admission, you hide all this stuff when you’re interacting with people face to face. Those people aren’t interacting with the real you; they’re interacting with the fake persona you’ve created for them.
No. That’s the point. You have no right to tell anyone that they shouldn’t be offended. You are not all knowing, so you have no way to know if the person should or should not be offended. You can ask them why they are offended. And you can explain a less offensive interpretation. But you can’t tell them they are wrong to be offended. You will just be seen as an asshole.
And you admit you were mocking, which means you weren’t actually offended. You were just feigning offense when it really didn’t bother you. That was exactly why I tested you, to see if you were just playing a game or if you were genuinely offended.
If you were genuinely offended, then I would have explored why you found it offensive. I would have explained that “bro” is not a gendered insult as much as it is a description of a specific type of culture. It comes from the idea of fraternity brothers.
I would have never said you were wrong to be offended. I would have listened and taken into account whether bro culture memes come off as offensive, and, while I might not stop saying it at all, I would be careful around you and aware that other people might find it offensive.
As is, you are not offended, so I have no reason to give a shit, bro.