Yeah, often they are too damn important to leave their own messages. Most executives I know have their administrative assistants record their VM greetings as a way to let the caller know that said assistant will be the one listening to the message. Executives often get a very large number of phone calls that they want no part of (job seekers, sales reps, folks upsert with the company, etc). This being the case, they have their secretary-types screen all of their calls, and sift out the crap. The “chick’s” voice on the voice mail greeting effectively says: “Hi, you can leave a message for Mister Welsh, but there is some chance that he will never get it. This will not be due to any error. Thanks.”
This sounds reasonable to me. If the guy genuinely has an admin who’s going to be screening calls, then his/her voice on the message makes sense. If not, not.
Huh. And you can tell that just by… what, exactly?
You realize you’ve just undone your whole fucking argument, don’t you?
Personally, I find it insulting (I’m an admin whose voice is on my boss’s OGM) that anyone would assume that I recorded the message out of my boss’s need to feel he is The Shizzle. Do you think I would work for someone who expects his “girl” to do the shit work??? Been there, quit that in under 30 days.
I recorded it for him because it’s a nice thing to do, as I simply can’t imagine him being able to make his message as to-the-point and professional sounding as I can. He treats me well. I do this as a courtesy for him. He is one of those guys who is oddly afraid of the phone system, and it’s no big deal for me to record it. Plus, my standards are high, and if I knew he recorded a poorly worded or confusing message, it would bug me.
BTW, it’s incidental that my boss is a man. I would do the same if my boss were a woman.
My job is to make him look as good as possible. This is also why I significantly edit/re-write his memos/letters, both internal and external. I am a much better writer than he is. He appreciates how good I make him look. There’s tons of stuff he does better than I ever could. And it’s my j-o-b to do those things so he is free to do the upper-level stuff I can’t do.
And, you know what? If a vendor/organization who wants our business gets the impression that my boss is important enough to have his secretary’s voice on his OGM, then all’s the better. Cuz you know why? They treat me better if they have to talk to me. The first rule of business is (or at least is should be) don’t piss off the secretary, and if by recording his OGM I send the message the he is A Very Important Man, then so much the better for me.
Niblet, do you happen to listen to your bosses VMs before he does? If not, do you know if any of your counterparts do this? Most of the executives I know don’t actually liaten to thir voicemail until the trash has been taken out. In many instances, the admin assistant will actually write down the pertinent information and just delete the VM.
Is any of this consistent with your experience?
In this job I do not check my boss’s voicemail as a general rule.
In other jobs - where my voice was NOT on the OGM - I WAS responsible for checking voicemail. (And would roll my eyes at people who wouldn’t leave a message with me, but wanted to go into the boss’s voicemail instead. Duh.)
In yet another job, I was neither the voice on the OGM nor the one transcribing the messages.
When I was an office manager, I checked my boss’ messages and summarized them for him. He was a headhunter and there was a LOT of stuff he didn’t want to deal with, so I sorted it. I also wrote all his letters and memos after he gave me the idea of what he wanted. But he still recorded his own OGM. Gave it the personal touch, he said. I agree.
Last post, and then I’m going to bed.
My boss thinks it would be ridiculous for me to answer/screen his calls. Why should I take his calls when he can take them himself? Plus, he doesn’t think he’s so important that he can’t answer his own phone.
He also will not let me get him coffee. OTH, he won’t let me carry “heavy” things.
I have a second boss. He records his own OGM. But then, he has a great voice (that he also uses professionally beyond his role at my company) and would think it ridiculous to have my voice on his OGM.
So, I guess my point is that you can’t assume things based on whether or not the admin records "You have reached the office of such-and-so… "
It’s not dishonesty, it’s just politeness. All you’re entitled know is for some reason I can’t talk to you right now. It’s none of your business whether it’s out of necessity or convenience, and if it’s convenience, it’s rude of me to flaunt the fact that I only return calls when it’s easiest for me.
“My earliest convenience” is just a dumb person trying to be polite but sounding rude.
Here’s another one that bugs me. I save up my personal calls until lunch hour like a good employee, I lay out my sandwich on my mousepad/placemat, start chowing down, and then start punching into what I know is going to be an automated system for at least the first 5 minutes.
Machine: “Say ‘one’ to continue.”
Me, mouth full of sandwich" <presses 1 on keypad>
Machine: “Sorry, I didn’t get that. Please speak ‘one’ to continue. Like verbally, with your mouth, because that keypad shit is so 1990’s.”
Me: “Omph”
Machine: "Sorry, I didn’t get that. Please say ‘one’ to continue.
Me: <chews madly for 3 seconds and swallows> ONE!!!
Machine: “We didn’t receive your response in the time allotted. Goodbye.”
Me: MOTHERFUCKERS!
Machine: I heard that. Listen as I shred your payment coupon… woops, we didn’t receive your mortgage payment in time. Looks like you’ll be getting a late charge this month.
Later…
Machine: Please say your social security number.
Me: <Pops head above cubicle. Surrounded by 10 employees. Don’t exactly feel like saying my SSN right now, if you know what I mean. Changes to different phone.
Machine: Please say your social security number.
Me: 123-45-6789
Machine: Um, OK. Please wait while I look that up.
Me: <thinking: YOU ARE A GODDAMNED MACHINE. YOU ARE NOT A REAL PERSON. YOU DO NOT USE VOCALIZED PAUSES LIKE “UM”. WHY THE FUCK DOES A MACHINE SAY “UM”? IF YOU WERE A REAL GODDAMNED PERSON I WOULD BE ABLE TO SAY “I JUST NEED A REPRINT OF MY STATEMENT” AND YOU’D DO IT.
One of my bosses wants me to listen to and transcribe all his voicemail messages, every day. I did do this for awhile, but this was when I worked for only two attorneys. I now work for five, and I don’t have half an hour twice a day to listen to his damned voicemail.
So now he completely ignores his voicemail messages. Never listens to them. At one point, I recorded a greeting which untruthfully stated that he “seldom” checked his messages and it was more productive to send him an e-mail. Then he started getting ridiculed by callers for his laziness, so he made me change it to something more ambiguous. As a result, his message box is always full, callers get re-routed to the receptionist, and everyone gets pissed off. But I’m damned if I’m going to go back to listening to his messages for him if he’s too damned lazy to do it himself. And yes, it’s because he’s lazy. He’s an of-counsel attorney, semi-retired, and not very busy.
You know, Aeschines, you really got me thinking. What is the right way to say it?
[ul]
[li]I’ll call you back at my earliest convenience.[/li][li]I’ll call you as soon as I have a chance.[/li][li]I’ll call you at my earliest opportunity.[/li][li]etc., etc., etc.[/li][/ul]
Then I realised that no version of the phrase is required. Of course you’ll be calling back. Otherwise you wouldn’t even have voicemail. My outgoing messages don’t say anything about calling back. My home line says, “You have reached the Wombats. Please leave a message.” My business line includes our operating hours and specifically requests that you leave your name, number, and reason for calling.
My big pet peeve? People who use canned messages with no identification. How do I know if I reached the right number when I just get robo-voice telling me to leave a message at the beep? I might have misdialed or written the number down wrong, and now I have to try it again because you couldn’t be troubled to record a message saying, “This is Alice. Leave a message.”
My OGM for a while was recorded (by me) first in english, then spanish, then german. Never mind that my cell phone number is only known to my friends, none of whom speak anything other than english and pig latin. It was a laugh, but I got rid of it since it kept folks on the phone for so long.
My friend Ron has a voicemail message that starts, “Hello, today is Friday May fifth…”. I always thought that he had some fantastic system there that did this automatically. Nope, he would rerecord his OGM every fuckin day.