Jean Claude VanDamme in …
…
................... actually in *anything*.I was out drinking recently with a friend’s son. He is in his twenties and at the pub we were at we happened to bump into some of his friends. Amongst them was a young guy who is a comedian/writer and he told us a long story about a bit he had written that was ripped off by other people on an Aussie TV show.
It wsa based on Seymour Philip Hoffman winning the Oscar for his part in Capote. He said, it occured to him one day that all these people saying that Hoffman had nailed Capote had probably never seen or heard Capote and maybe he was nothing like that but that was all Hoffman could do.
He then proceeded to do his impression of SPH auditioning for many other roles and doing them just like his turn in Capote. My favourite was:
[Capote]The truth. The truth. You want the truth! I mock your truth handling abilities.[/Capote]
closely followed by:
[Capote]I could have been one of those in contention, contending, a contender. I could have been somebody instead of a hobo, which is what I am.[/Capote]
Maybe you had to be there but it was just about the funniest five minutes of my life.
Be very careful what you joke about…I could see very easily a studio exec going along with any one of those ideas.
What’re you talking about?? Norris would be perfect!
Anne Ramsey as Lady Viola in Shakespeare in Love
With Pauly Shore as Shakespeare 
Rob Reiner as the Narrator in Fight Club
George Carlin as Alexander Pope in The Red Violin
Andy Richter as Homer in October Sky
Leslie Nielsen-Hamlet
“Go ahead. Make my day. Because I’m going to send you to etenal nothingness, which is a nice place if you’re dressed for it.”
Jessica Tandy as Ellen Ripley in the Alien series.
That’s such a prized role and being alive will probably figure in to the casting decision, so I’m going to offer a few viable alternatives, if you don’t mind:
Judi Dench
Helen Mirren
Olympia Dukakis
Meredith Vieira
Katie Couric
Rachael Ray
I didn’t know Jessica Tandy was dead, but I can actually see Dames Judi and Helen playing a Ripley-esque character. They certainly are both capable of the steely determination aspects of the role, if not the intensely physical ones.
William…Shatner…in any…dramatic…role
KHAAAAAANNNN!!!
I can see Shatner doing Shakespeare. In fact, I think that’s how he got his start.
To be. Or. Not to. Be. That. Is the. Question. Spock!
I recall a thread llike this. If memory serves, my bad casting included:
Wally Cox as Dirty Harry
and
Paul Lynde is Snake Plissken!
Sir Rhosis
Robert Knepper as Edna Turnblad.
He’s way too thin.
Yes, sorry to report that Jessica Tandy left us in 1994. Good points about the Dames Dench and Mirren. It might even be a fun movie with some of the others.
MAD TV did a sketch with Woody Allen in Bruce Willis’ role in Die Hard.
Desi Arnaz & Lucille Ball in Misery (“Waaaahhh!!! You killed my Misery!” “Now honey, it was 1869, women died in childbirth!” “I don’t care you Cuban cocksucker! I want her baaaaaaaaaaack!”
Charles Nelson Reilly in The Exorcist (Demon: “I just saw your mother in Hellllllll…” Father CNR: “Oh God, please don’t tell her I’m here…”)
Don Knotts in The Godfather (“You gotta nip those Barzinis in the bud, Mikey, nip 'em in the bud! I like wine more than I used to.”)
Hell, how about Kathy Bates in Body Heat and Kathleen Turner in Misery?
“Your husband? Honey, I wouldn’t kill Hitler to sleep with you.”
“OK, so let me get this straight. You’re gonna chain me half-naked to the bed and shoot me up with drugs all day while I write the Great American Novel? Where’s the catch?”
I’d almost say Keanu Reeves as Harker in Dracula, but it’s been done and I don’t want to turn this into an anti-Keanu thread. It’s been done.
So let’s turn that around.
How about John Wayne, Robert DeNiro, Jack Black or Chris Farley as Neo in The Matrix?
Jimmy Stewart as Dirty Harry.
“Now look here. This here is a .44 magnum. Yeah. It sure is. The most powerful gun made by man Well sure. So…so the question you gotta ask yourself is…well…you gotta ask yourself if you feel lucky. So…do you feel lucky, punk?”
Try Ellen Degeneres as Ripley.
so we can used deceased celebs now? cool.
How about Keanu Reeves, Emilio Estevez, or Judd Hirsch as Rick Blane in Casablanca?
eta - I knew they’re not dead - that firsat sentance was a completely separate comment