Recommend a good facial hair softener

I like my goatee. She doesn’t.

I usually condition it with regular conditioner in the shower, then pat on some cdecent clove oil I found years ago, but I’m wondering if anyone has a line on anything really good.

Help save my goatee, please, I beg you.

Well, conditioner helps, but so does outgrowth of the beard. My husband has a long beard and it’s very soft. It’s those 3-4 days growth ones that’ll kill ya.

Zumenon - ie Oestrogen

Sorry mate, you can’t win this one.

Comic strip character Opal Pickles, talking about Earl’s moustache, said, “A kiss without a tickle isn’t worth a nickel.” Obviously, your lady disagrees.

Your beard hair is thicker and scratchier than your scalp hair. Try applying hand lotion two or three times a day.