And had nothing to do with the wine stain, but you wanted everyone to know that they look amazing.
That’s why you did not post this in GQ. I get it now.
See I read her post and thought she was describing why this particular white shirt is special. Not all shirts (white or otherwise) are created equally and it’s really nice to get one that makes the most of one’s figure. Otherwise if it were just a boring ol white shirt, she wouldn’t have cared nearly so much that it had the huge red wine stain on it. She’s have tossed it and gotten another one.
“It is my favorite shirt” is good enough for that, right? No one is going to ask for a cite about that.
Are you just wanting to be ultra picky? She provided details about why the shirt was so perfect. Why does that bother you?
I’m a bit late to the party, but if anyone should stumble across this thread and have an interest in creative problem solving, I thought I’d pass along a tip I saw demonstrated once. If you spill something on a white shirt, and don’t think you can remove the stain, soak the whole shirt in whatever you spilled. It’s not a stain anymore, it’s a shirt of a new color. I saw it done with coffee, and the coffee-stain color looked pretty good. I don’t know if it would work with red wine; but if the alternative was to throw the shirt away, give it a shot.
Because she mentioned her breasts for no reason and then was upset when the inevitable ‘cite’ was posted in response.
Don’t want to talk about your boobies? Then don’t start an OP by mentioning them. Don’t like the inevitable ‘cite’ response? Then don’t give them the opening to do so. If you do, then quit yer bitchin’ when it happens.
I probably should just STFU, but I’d be in support of the OP if her post was “Help, I’ve ruined my favorite shirt and need to replace it. It fit perfectly and had excellent darts that made my waist look tiny and my boobs look amazing. Does anyone have any ideas on where to get one that will do the same?”
It’s different when the question is about getting a stain out of cloth.
Ok, now I will STFU.
Uh, the cite isn’t ‘inevitable’, it’s a choice on the poster’s part. There is no force compelling you to be sexist. You can choose to do it or not do it.
You must be very unfamiliar with women’s clothes and bodies, because no shirt fits two women the same way, because women’s bodies are differently shaped and proportioned. How is the Dope going to know what’s going to fit me? I posted a long list of things I love about that shirt to explain why it’s special to me. No one demanded cites of my purple skirt or its work vs theatre flexibility. I’m not going to “quit bitching” because I assumed people would address the content of my post, and instead some of them made a boring sexist joke. My mentioning that I am a woman and I have breasts is not an “opening” for you to be tediously lecherous. As I said, I should not have to pretend I’m shapeless and sexless to avoid sexist comments.
As were the words you chose to use in your OP.
You can’t control how others react or what they think; would you want to?
I discussed this with a woman friend of mine (who is smarter that me & I’m trying to get onboard).
She mentioned that most women would “get” exactly what you meant, having a different connection to their clothing.
Another woman friend once told me “Hon, a woman knows how she looks at all times.”
Men, on the other hand, don’t care if your favorite shirt is white or blue or if it has a wine stain, we’re just naturally more accepting 
P.S. the woman friend suggested you switch to white wine 
Obviously I can’t force anybody not to be sexist, but I can ask them not to and explain why things are sexist if they’re confused.
I’m going to go out on a limb and say that I think sexist behaviour should stop. So, I will act to eliminate sexist behaviour.
Why do I care how men feel about my clothing? I posted about a shirt that was important to me, explained why it is important to me, and asked for advice on how to save it. Not for anybody to whuffle up and pant heavily on my window.
Yow! My post is making the rounds, I see.
Here’s my take on this situation: Tracy mentioned the boobs thing because it’s something we women can relate to. She could have phrased it some other way, like “It flatters me perfectly” or “It fits my curves just right,” but that doesn’t evoke the same feelings. It’s a woman thing, mainly, I think, having a piece of clothing that shows your body at its absolute best. I get it.
And she’s asking about a stain. That’s not exactly an invitation for flirtation. This is a pretty civilized message board, Ed Zotti’s opinion aside. So what makes guys feel it’s OK to do this? I’m betting that there are no (or very few) Doper guys who would walk up to a woman on the street and ask if he could take a photo of her boobs or ass, even if she were wearing sexy clothes or “flaunting” her hotness. It would be incredibly rude and demeaning, and in this day and age, “she was asking for it” doesn’t cut it any more.
If any of you actually want a shot at seeing Tracy’s (or anyone else’s) cleavage*, I would suggest treating her in the same way you would treat a woman to her face. The SDMB would be a much better place if we all remembered that we’re interacting with real people every now and then. And I say this as a skeptic about the new rules, even.
*I make no promises.
And the amazing looking boobs have absolutely nothing to do with the problem of getting the stains out. Here is a thought: You know that white shirt that makes your boobs look like you spent the last twenty years pulling sixteen hour shifts as a wet nurse at the county orphanage? You get wine stains out the exact same way.
No, but they have everything to do with why it’s an important shirt to me. It is not an ordinary shirt. It is a special shirt. I explained why. I should not have to pretend I am sexless and shapeless to avoid sexist comments.
Are you still going on about this? Really?
While I understand your general position, let me point out that:
“Not mentioning your tits out of the blue” =/= “Prentending to be sexless and shapeless”
It’s fairly common for a woman to say that an article of clothing makes her boobs or butt look good. I hear other women say that kind of thing all the time.
I guess it’s not often said in mixed company though…and now I see why.
Okay, I won’t argue that. I will say, though, that neither do you have to gush about why the shirt is your favorite and tie it in to the wonderful skirt it goes with and go into detail about darts and waist and boobs. For that matter, you didn’t even have to say it was your favorite shirt.
Nevertheless, simply saying it was your favorite shirt would have been fine, and more than enough for both males and females to understand that you really wanted to clean it rather than replace it. And you would have gotten the same amount and level of advice about the stain.
Now, some of the responses you got may have been unseemly, but you absolutely opened the door to that by going into all the “girl talk” about fashion and body parts. So if you really don’t want to bear sexist comments, then besides helping with the long slow process of educating the world, consider the immediate benefit of not saying “my boobs look amazing” when it’s not necessary to so proclaim.
I think you’re right about random people on the street. And I agree it makes sense to communicate here as if one were face to face with the other posters. So are we to assume that Tracy subscribes to this principle, and tells people to their face that her “boobs look amazing?” If so, for the sake of her sanity, I hope she’s not shocked if some folks actually make a comment about them.
Well, I’m assuming that in person, she doesn’t need to describe the way her boobs look in the shirt because people can see her. On the other hand, that’s problematic, because then where do you draw the line? I’m leaning toward acts of rudeness. If Tracy mentioned her boobs to a group of people at a party in this way, a few people might be put off by her frankness, but she’s definitely not being rude. However, the “NEED PIX”-type comments would be rude for sure.
It’s a hard call to make, but yes, I have reason to believe that if Tracy were telling people IRL why this shirt is her favorite, she would mention that. So yeah, I see it as different. YMMV.
And before more guys start in about this–numerous threads on this board indicate that men, as a group, generally need and want pointers about what is sleazy/creepy/over the line when interacting with women. So consider this a public service. It is.
Gary T,
Yes, I would say that to my friends and people who I trust not to be sleazy. I put the Dope in the latter category - I agree with Millit’s party analogy. In fact, come to think of it I did stain it at a real-life party, and I did say “Oh! This is my favorite shirt! It’s the only one that goes with this skirt! I wear it everywhere! Look at the darts and the little pinstripes! It makes my rack look great! The sleeves are the perfect length!” to the group I’d been talking with, which included three people I knew quite well, including my best friend, and two people I had just met that night, one of whom was a man. He went off to get some salt and paper towels. He did not say, “Well, whip it off, let’s see 'em!”
I’m also a bit confused by your judging what is “necessary” to a post, as you seem to be arguing that all posts on the SDMB should be matter-of-fact and purely informational. I don’t understand what your point is, if not. How do you feel about, for example, Sampiro’s wonderful posts, which are full of all sorts of unnecessary information? Or, if those are all right, where is the line? Is it “whenever a woman mentions identifiable female aspects of herself, that’s open season on sexism”? I hope not.
I’d also like to see where, in any of this thread, I have expressed “shock”. Those comments weren’t shocking, they were tedious.