Buncha damn Yankees
Think they won the Civil War
Well, we’re gonna show them
Heritage, not hate
We’re still gonna fly our flag
So what if we lost
Wedding dilemma:
A dip in at the altar?
Swallow; spittoon’s tacky
I’m not a redneck;
However, my last line proves
Can’t count syllables
Make that spittoon “gauche.” 
Middle name of Wayne
Makes it much, much more likely
He’ll be a killer.
That’s been proved, ya know -
all scientifical, too! -
by News of the Weird.
Besides, don’t you fergit:
A King outranks a Duke, hoss.
So go with Elvis.
Milossarian,
Guess what? That ain’t no spittoon.
It’s for the off’rin.
And whut kind of name
IS that, anyway? FOREIGN?
We don’t like yer kind.
Y’all come over here
And take our jobs! (Well, ‘course, ah
ain’t workin’ - but STILL…)
Sweet sixteen party
Bubba Sue done peed her pants
We was howlin’ good
She’s a big ol’ mess
Cuz we rolt her down that hill
We was just joshin’
Bubba Sue’s steamin’
Took a frying pan to me
Good thing I am drunk
Dirty rag, duct tape
Redneck ER technolgy
Can’t wear rags in church
Home, Sunday morning
Nobody here but me and
The deluxe TV
How in Hades do you
Work this fancy VCR?
Wanna tape wrassling
Asleep on the couch
But something smells ripe in here
Oh shit, it’s just me
You got store bought clothes
All your teeth look like they’s real
You ain’t from 'round here!
Famous middle name
Has some sort of attraction
Kings get beheaded
Hello to aim’n’rock.
(see also: Original Limericks)
Peace,
TN*hippie