Relationship survey: What are the majority of your fights about?

In My Humble Opinion
1

I am doing a paper mocking statistics for my English class… And was hoping you all would be so kind as to fill out my survey for me so I can have statistics to play with. My topic is relationship tension. Thank you! :slight_smile:

Short answer demographic questions:

Age you most closely identify with:

Gender you most closely identify with:

Ethnic origin you most closely identify with:

Hometown you most closely identify with:

Height while wearing the shoes of your choice:

Do you like Marilyn Manson?:

What about Marilyn Monroe?:

Are you a Raiders fan?:

Are you for or against the color pink?:

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?:

Long answer (hopefully!) survey questions (if you do not currently have a partner, feel free to fill the survey out about a previous partner)

  1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)?

  2. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over?

  3. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner?

  4. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness?

  5. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)?

  6. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner.

  7. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them?

  8. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument?

2

Almost without exception, and for more than 30 years now, topic number one is at what speed the children are going to Hell in a hand basket. Topic number two is just how crazy my mother is. There is no question that my mother is nuts, the fight is how nuts.

To hell with your survey.

3

Age you most closely identify with:
22

Gender you most closely identify with:
Female
Ethnic origin you most closely identify with:
Quebecker

Hometown you most closely identify with:
Sherbrooke, QC.

Height while wearing the shoes of your choice:
5 foot 7

Do you like Marilyn Manson?:
There are some good songs, but not a favourite

What about Marilyn Monroe?:
No particular opinion

Are you a Raiders fan?:
Nope

Are you for or against the color pink?:
For. Unless it’s ALL OVER THE PLACE. Then I’m against it.

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?:
Yep. And into a clover.

Long answer (hopefully!) survey questions (if you do not currently have a partner, feel free to fill the survey out about a previous partner)

  1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)?

Him not paying attention to me when I say something. He doesn’t transition well from one thing (like homework) to another (like conversation).

  1. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over?

My stubbornness.

  1. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner?

Aplologies, and explanations of my actions and feelings at the time of the argument. We try and explain to each other what lead us to respond as we did, to try and avoid it in the future.

  1. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness?

See above. He also tends to give hugs first, then apologise.

  1. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)?

I get stressed with lack of sleep, and too much homework gets to us often (we are both 4th year university students). We tend to let ouside stresses into our relationship, but we are getting better at avoiding that.

  1. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner.

The breakup of his dad and step-mom led a lot of sadness and stress for me, as well as insecurities which are pretty much unfounded. I started thinking of “like father like son” type situations. It was the only night we’d ever spend in separate rooms in this apartment. We settled things the next day - both of us were in quite a bit of shock and not in a great place then.

  1. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them?

Eye rolling, sighing, yelling. Unfortunately, the occasional insult. Fights tend to be vocal at first, then some quiet, “fuming” time, then we talk about it.

  1. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument?

Aften an argument, I tend to feel closer, since we had an emotional moment together, and it allowed me to learn more about him. I try and learn from arguments, and I know he does too. Though actually, we are very like minded on a lot of issues, so the arguments we do have tend to be fairly insignificant and superficial.

4

Short answer demographic questions:

Age you most closely identify with:
25
Gender you most closely identify with:
Female-like
Ethnic origin you most closely identify with:
Whitey
Hometown you most closely identify with:
Kansas City Missouri
Height while wearing the shoes of your choice:
5’9’’
Do you like Marilyn Manson?:
no
What about Marilyn Monroe?:
not particularly
Are you a Raiders fan?:
Raiders of the Lost Ark? YES!
Are you for or against the color pink?:
against, unless biological
Can you curl your tongue in a circle?:
yes, sir. My mother can’t. Everyone else in my family can. HA!

Long answer (hopefully!) survey questions (if you do not currently have a partner, feel free to fill the survey out about a previous partner)

  1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)? percieved neglect, usually only in my head

  2. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over?
    percieved neglect, only in my head; oversexuality

  3. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner? Talk, work it out, compromise

  4. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness? same as #3.

  5. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)? Money, lack of. Differing sex drives.

  6. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner.
    Sex. I wanted, he didn’t.

  7. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them?
    Talk. Much talk.

  8. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument?
    Closer, after.

5

Short answer demographic questions:

Age you most closely identify with: 33

Gender you most closely identify with: F

Ethnic origin you most closely identify with: Caucasian

Hometown you most closely identify with:

Height while wearing the shoes of your choice: 5’6"

Do you like Marilyn Manson?: I don’t know

What about Marilyn Monroe?: Yes

Are you a Raiders fan?: Sometimes

Are you for or against the color pink?: ??

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?: yes

Long answer (hopefully!) survey questions (if you do not currently have a partner, feel free to fill the survey out about a previous partner)

  1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)?

Him nagging me and holding me to impossibly high standards.

  1. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over?

Being a slob.

  1. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner?

Um, initiate sex with him

  1. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness?

Apologize or explain to me why he did something or feels a certain way

  1. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)?

Difference in how house should be kept. He wants it perfect, I’m a little looser. He doesn’t necessarily hold me accountable for the housework, but he claims I don’t do my fair share (I see it as me not living up to his ridiculously high standards).

  1. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner.

Fighting about the housework.

  1. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them?

He acts mad and I say “what’s your problem?”. I usually will just tell him I’m mad at him.

  1. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument?

Depends.

6

Age you most closely identify with: 20

**Gender you most closely identify with: ** Female

Ethnic origin you most closely identify with: Asian/Australian

Hometown you most closely identify with: Melbourne, Australia

Height while wearing the shoes of your choice: 5’2"

Do you like Marilyn Manson?: Nope

**What about Marilyn Monroe?: ** Yup

Are you a Raiders fan?: Nope

Are you for or against the color pink?: For

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?: No

**1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over? ** Not being paid enough attention.

2. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over? When I get angry at him for unreasonable things.

3. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner? Looking cute and hugging him.

4. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness? He leaves me alone for awhile. Or says something to make me smile.

5. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship? Uni-related stress. Sometimes my laziness.

6. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner. Sorry! We’ve never had a major fight. The longest has been about 12 hours, 8 of which included sleep.

7. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them? We both tend to get snippy and give short answers to his questions.

8. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument? Neither.

7

Age you most closely identify with: I’m 31… I identify with 27.

Gender you most closely identify with: Male

Ethnic origin you most closely identify with: White / Portuguese

Hometown you most closely identify with: Brasilia

Height while wearing the shoes of your choice: 1,77 cm

Do you like Marilyn Manson?: NOPE

What about Marilyn Monroe?: Yeah…

Are you a Raiders fan?: Yes

Are you for or against the color pink?: Neutral

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?: almost

  1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)? Delays and overcontrol.

  2. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over? Lack of afection.

  3. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner? Time

  4. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness? Talk and sex.

  5. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)? Money and work

  6. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner. -hhmm… different views on our future.

  7. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them? - extreme facial expression tell it all… cold atitude too.

  8. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument? more distant naturally

8

**Age you most closely identify with: ** 30-45 age group

Gender you most closely identify with: Female

**Ethnic origin you most closely identify with: **

**Hometown you most closely identify with: ** quasi rural americana. (Farmer & rural area that is quickly infested with yuppies searching for Mayberry.)

**Height while wearing the shoes of your choice: ** 5.4

Do you like Marilyn Manson?: absolutely not

**What about Marilyn Monroe?: ** she’s ok.

Are you a Raiders fan?: nope.

**Are you for or against the color pink?: ** when used in moderation.

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?: regretfully, no.

Long answer (hopefully!) survey questions (if you do not currently have a partner, feel free to fill the survey out about a previous partner)

**1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)? ** His codependent family and if he would put his tools away when he finished he last project instead of leaving them right there then he would be able to find them instantly rather than wandering about in search of for hours/days. He has no beef with me…well…except for my penchant for wearing PJ’s all day, nap times and general overuse of the word ‘fuck’.

2. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over? How I don’t want to associate with his family more than absolutely necessary. (Birthdays/holidays) He could see them every night, god, I’d rather poke my eyes out.

**3. What have you found to be the most effective w
ay to be forgiven by your partner?**I suggest he trot off to Home Depot for some tool therapy. But usually a leveling, no nonsense " I’m sorry".

**4. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness? ** He would tell you he is never wrong. Hah. He just lets me have time to myself or a spree at a bookstore.

**5. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)? ** Family. His. Mine is dying or dead or pure comic relief.

**6. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner. ** His family is very nice and decent and emotionally dependent on my husband. He is the husband to his spineless emotionally needy mother. He is the brother to his wheelchair-bound father. He is the father to his sister (deluded, codependent pretentious sheep who has a cult following that mystifies me to no end. ) who married a nice guy ( for his future earnings potential and social standing) who cannot do jackshit around his house ( but a thoroughly likeably fellow despite his born-again evangelical views.) He cannot say no to anyone, so apparently, that is my job. Essentially he is his family’s worker drone. Did I mention they are German and have the sense of humor level that is quisessetially Kraut-i-fied? [size=1] Oh, apparently, I’m a pessimist and rather blunt at times. I don’t know what the fuck that is all about :smiley:

7**. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them?** Leaving seething messages via voicemail to him is a wonderful buffer. it gives him time to formulate his response and allows me venting space. The cell phone is a wonderfully neutral thing.

**8. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument? **

We don’t argue. He is too reasonable. he grew up watching parents argue and he won’t have anything to do with it. He sulks or pouts. I would love a good ripping fight, going nose-to-nose completely off the cuff spew I can handle on the fly without missing a beat. . Death and all its sundry I can handle, big fat cow eyes (his mother and sister’s usual method of defense.) just leave me stymied and leaves me emotionally constipated. ( God, I love that phrase.)

The question you need to ask:

9. Overall, how well do you and your SO/Spouse get along and handle crisis? Very well, thank you very much. We are complete opposites: he is cheerfully optimistic, I am the jaded voice of doom ™ . ( I would like to add that I am usually right -as in spot on right - because optimists are terrible judges of character because they are too busy admiring the sunshine that shines out of everyones arseholes.)

We’ve weathered so many non-self induced crisis ( inlaws horrific accident, my brothers decimating/debilititating disease/deaths, my mother’s comical-yet-painful panic attacks, my father-in-laws inability to realize the world doesn’t revolve around him, building a house, hubby working 120 hours a week for years on end, car trips ( ha, more stressful than a protologists exam) being sued, two car accidents within 3 weeks of each other, power outages that occur fairly regularly here it seems, my migraines and the terminality of the Lions lose season after season.) when we watch couples argue over such transient things like money and toothpaste in the sink we just don’t get it.
Whew. what fun.

9

Age you most closely identify with:
38

Gender you most closely identify with:
Female

Ethnic origin you most closely identify with:
Caucasian

Hometown you most closely identify with:
Chicago

Height while wearing the shoes of your choice:
5’ 9"

Do you like Marilyn Manson?:
No

What about Marilyn Monroe?:
No

Are you a Raiders fan?:
No

Are you for or against the color pink?:
Don’t like it

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?:
Yep.

  1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)?
    The condition he leaves the microwave in.

  2. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over?
    The condition I leave the house in.

  3. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner?
    To apologize and ask for it (forgiveness).

  4. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness?
    He apologizes and asks for it (forgiveness).

  5. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)?
    Money, childraising

  6. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner.
    Pornography. I won’t go into it further.

  7. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them?
    We yell and scream.

  8. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument?
    No different.

10
11

Sorry the 'amsters ate my replies, they weren’t any good anyway.

12

Age you most closely identify with: 30
**Gender you most closely identify with: ** male
**Ethnic origin you most closely identify with: ** Wonder bread white
Hometown you most closely identify with: pass, next question
**Height while wearing the shoes of your choice: ** 6’8"
Do you like Marilyn Manson?: I like his song on the Matrix soundtrack, but I think he’s an idiot.
What about Marilyn Monroe?: Ambivalent
Are you a Raiders fan?: No.
**Are you for or against the color pink?: ** Pink and I have agreed to disagree.
Can you curl your tongue in a circle?: It’s more of an ellipse.

1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)? Being so damn loveable and perfect it makes me look bad. Also, sometimes punching me in the kidneys while I sleep.

2. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over? Eating all the mayonnaise.

3. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner? Rim job. (Who doesn’t love having their tires rotated?)

**4. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness? ** Rim job. (Who doesn’t love having their asshole licked?)

**5. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)? ** Deciding whose turn it is to bury the dead hobo this time.

6. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner. When I found out you can’t get herpes from trying on bathing suits at Walmart.

7. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them? Semaphore using our middle fingers.

**8. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument? ** Only when I wake up in a dumpster in Mexico.

13

Short answer demographic questions:

Age you most closely identify with: 23

Gender you most closely identify with: Female

Ethnic origin you most closely identify with: Whitey Mcwhitington

Hometown you most closely identify with: Peterborough, Ontario

Height while wearing the shoes of your choice: 5’ 3"

Do you like Marilyn Manson?: Music? No. Opinions? Yes. Girlfriend? Definitely.

What about Marilyn Monroe?: Thinking about her makes me sad.

Are you a Raiders fan?: Hell no, I hate American Football in all its forms.

Are you for or against the color pink?: For, in moderation.

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?: yes.

Long answer (hopefully!) survey questions (if you do not currently have a partner, feel free to fill the survey out about a previous partner)

1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)? Lack of communication and/or ceaseless whingeing.

2. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over? Saying insensitive things, having unreasonable expectations. Being overly sensitive.

3. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner? Talking it over after a breather, apologizing.

4. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness? Apologizes.

5. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)? Lack of sleep, neglecting our health, the housework.

6. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner. Once I kissed another girl when I was drunk at a party.

7. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them? We give each other the silent treatment.

8. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument? More distant during, closer after. Always closer. Closer and closer.

14

**Short answer demographic questions:

Age you most closely identify with:**
mid thirties

Gender you most closely identify with:
Male

Ethnic origin you most closely identify with:
Earth

Hometown you most closely identify with:
San Francisco

Height while wearing the shoes of your choice:
6’ even

Do you like Marilyn Manson?:
I like his style, but nothing else

What about Marilyn Monroe?:
What about her? She was before my time, and not a good actress. I like her style, but that’s it.

Are you a Raiders fan?:
Only if they’re of the Norse Viking type of a thousand years ago.

Are you for or against the color pink?:
I believe all colors have the right to exist and be recognized. I like Mr. Pink, the Pink Panther, and the band Pink. I’m neutral on the color itself.

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?:
That’s the least of my tongue tricks.

1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)? Her self image and self esteem, her constant illnesses (whether real or imagined), the mess that is our house, her inability to discipline our kids and caving all the time to their tantrums.

2. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over? My flirting, time spent on the computer, long hours at work, messy house, don’t show enough emotion for her tastes.

3. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner? Explain my reasons for my actions/words in a calm, logical way. Look at her lovingly and say I’m sorry.

4. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness? Say she’s sorry, beat herself up over the issue, and try to gain my sympathy.

5. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)? Opposite shifts in our jobs, tight budget.

6. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner. Questioning our love for each other. And coming away from it unsure about the answer.

7. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them? We try to approach each other at different times (her usually right away, me after I’ve thought about it a lot), then neither of us wants to listen at that moment. We usually just fume through it on our own, say a few words, then put it behind us.

8. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument? Closer during the arguement, then more distant.

15

Age you most closely identify with:
25

Gender you most closely identify with:
Male

Ethnic origin you most closely identify with:
Pangaean

Hometown you most closely identify with:
Baltimore

Height while wearing the shoes of your choice:
5’5.5"

Do you like Marilyn Manson?:
The man or the artist? I like Marilyn Manson songs.

What about Marilyn Monroe?:
The woman or the actress? I’ve liked a few Marilyn Monroe flicks.

Are you a Raiders fan?:
No

Are you for or against the color pink?:
Neither. It’s a frickin’ color.

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?:
Yes but it’ll cost ya $50 bucks to see.

Long answer (hopefully!) survey questions (if you do not currently have a partner, feel free to fill the survey out about a previous partner)

  1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)?
    Toothpaste in the sink.

  2. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over?
    I’m a bitch.

  3. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner?
    Blowjobs.

  4. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness?
    Apologize for even existing.

  5. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)?
    Different views on sleep .

  6. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner.
    I don’t want to talk about it.

  7. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them?
    A lot of single-finger gestures, if you get my drift.

  8. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument?
    Closer. Make-up sex rocks.

16

Short answer demographic questions:

Age you most closely identify with:
31, I guess.

Gender you most closely identify with:
Male

Ethnic origin you most closely identify with:
None in particular - Canadian, I guess

Hometown you most closely identify with:
Toronto, Ontario

Height while wearing the shoes of your choice:
6’3"

Do you like Marilyn Manson?:
No

What about Marilyn Monroe?:
Even less

Are you a Raiders fan?:
No

Are you for or against the color pink?:
I’m for it. People would look strange if they were blue.

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?:
No

Long answer (hopefully!) survey questions (if you do not currently have a partner, feel free to fill the survey out about a previous partner)

  1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)?

We never FIGHT - ever - but when we’re disagreeing it’s usually about money and financial plans.

  1. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over?

See #1

  1. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner?

We always seem to get over it. I’m not sure what we do.

  1. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness?

See #3

  1. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)?

My sister who lives with us is #1. We don’t argue about it, though, but it sure stresses things.

  1. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner.

Her calling off the wedding the first time around.

  1. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them?

Just talk.

  1. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument?

Invariably more distant for a little while.

17

Age you most closely identify with: 31

Gender you most closely identify with: Male

Ethnic origin you most closely identify with: White American

Hometown you most closely identify with: Philadelphia, PA

Height while wearing the shoes of your choice: 6’

Do you like Marilyn Manson?: He ok, not my favorite

What about Marilyn Monroe?: Sure, shes hot

Are you a Raiders fan?: Nope

Are you for or against the color pink?: Against

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?: Yes

  1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over? Nagging

  2. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over? My argumentative personality

  3. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner? A short time apart to think things over then an apology

  4. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness? Time apart and then an apology

  5. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship? How exactly to interact with each other when we disagree

  6. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner. Me understanding that when she nags she doesn’t mean to offend, and the same for her when I get argumentative.

  7. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them? Body language, eventual degeneration of the converstaion into name calling.

  8. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument? More distant during, closer after

18

Short answer questions:
29, F, white, Saratoga CA, 5’8", don’t care -, don’t care +, HELL NO!, for, yes.

Long answer (hopefully!) survey questions:

  1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)?
    Being totally dense and clueless.

  2. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over?
    Being a moody bitch.

  3. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner?
    Sex

  4. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness?
    Oral sex and/or foot massage.

  5. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)?
    Me being a moody bitch, him being dense and clueless.

  6. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner.
    The day I stayed at home for bereavement when I was supposed to go on vacation, only to find out that he took the day off, knew I was home, and never called me.

  7. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them?
    I am a complete bitch. It doesn’t work, hye is too dense. Quote (from an argument): “You’re hitting me over the head with a mallet but I can’t feel it because it’s not a hammer.”

  8. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument?
    More distant every time. I don’t think this one is going to last.

19

**Age you most closely identify with: ** closer to SSI than SSS [almost] **

Gender you most closely identify with:** XYYish**

Ethnic origin you most closely identify with: ** WASPish**

Hometown you most closely identify with:** Gotham**

Height while wearing the shoes of your choice:** 6"- i mean 6’**

Do you like Marilyn Manson?:** Charlie’s angel? Love her**

What about Marilyn Monroe?:** Almost as much as JFK- and a lot more that Bobby**

Are you a Raiders fan?:** which one- LA, Oakland? [Jerry Seinfeld] Aren’t we really just cheering for the uniform? [/Jerry Seinfeld]**

Are you for or against the color pink?: For and against and for and against and for and against and for and against [rinse and repeat]

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?:Ibid.

Long answer (hopefully!) survey questions (if you do not currently have a partner, feel free to fill the survey out about a previous partner)** The following will be answered with specific references to the Wicked Witch of the West Village, aka my ex.**

  1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)? **She had no soul. **

  2. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over?** That I was drawing breath and that I could sleep easily at night as my conscience was crystal clear- you see, she had trouble sleeping b/c she made a deal with Satan and…**

  3. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner?** Error 404**

  4. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness?** But that would require that she acknowledge her own imperfections and the resultant contribution to our marital discord? In ten [10!] years together she never admitted fault, never apologized, and never conceded any argument/ quarrel. [Also there was a small issue of being a minion of Lucifer] **

  5. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)?** After finishing grad school, she basically made her work her entire life- billed 2500+ hours in her first year [add 30- 50% for ttl hrs in office]. Plus, did I mention that she had no soul? **

  6. Please describe the circumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner.
    ** huh.
    Well after closing up my successful business to go back to grad school- a business which I might add that had put her through grad school as well as gave me the connections to get her hooked up with her first post grad school job [albeit w/o her knowledge], she decided to let me know a month before first year finals that she didn’t ‘want to be married anymore’, and that in fact she ‘never should have married [me] in the first place’, then demanding during finals that I move out b/c she couldn’t ‘take it’. she also found it ‘interesting that * took off [my] wedding band the day after’ she first called it off [to which I responded that I found it more interesting that she was still wearing hers]
    But I am okay with all that.

Really.**

  1. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them?** Communicate? Wazzat? Did I mention that I identify with the XY side? And that she had no soul?**

  2. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument? **Obviously things didn’t work out, so I guess that I’d have to say about the same? And then there was the whole ‘no soul’ thing…

20

Age you most closely identify with: 66

Gender you most closely identify with: male

Ethnic origin you most closely identify with: Jewish

Hometown you most closely identify with: Philadelphia

Height while wearing the shoes of your choice: 6’2"

Do you like Marilyn Manson?: Who’s she?

What about Marilyn Monroe?: Oh she was a babe!!!

Are you a Raiders fan?: No, I almost never watch football

Are you for or against the color pink?: Great in flowers; otherwise not crazy about it.

Can you curl your tongue in a circle?: Yes. I can make it into a tube in either direction or just make a depression in the middle.

  1. When you are mad/annoyed at your partner, what is it usually over (cheating, toothpaste in the sink, different choices in music, etc.)?

When she won’t let me explain why I did something, but just insists on being annoyed.

  1. When your partner is mad/annoyed at you, what is it usually over?

She feels I have embarassed her in public.

  1. What have you found to be the most effective way to be forgiven by your partner?

Time heals all wounds.

  1. What does your partner usually do to gain your forgiveness?

Time heals all wounds.

  1. What do you view as the main stressors in your relationship (lack of sleep, different views on money, etc.)?

Spending money has a become a game. I win if she doesn’t and she wins if she does. Also our house is filling with “stuff”.

  1. Please describe the cirsumstances surrounding the most serious tension that has ever been between you and your partner.

It sounds silly, but, once we were walking down the street and I wanted to catch up with a friend who was ahead of us. I shook off her arm and caught up with my friend I wanted to say something to. This happened 30 years ago and seems to be thrown in my face every time we fight.

  1. What do you and your partner do to communicate to each other that you are mad/annoyed with them?

Not communicate with her.

  1. Do you find that you feel closer or more distant from your partner during and after an argument?

More distant.