What are people’s experiences with wearing something on their head for religious reasons versus the antiquated notions of propriety? And what does the law have to say about it?
In high school we had one teacher who wouldn’t let his students wear hats in the classroom because he considered it rude. This was the first I had ever heard of such a thing (I grew up in New York). I later read up on it and discovered it used to be a big rule of ettiquette, but it seemed like any basis it might have had no longer could make a claim to common sense.
I was in court twice recently, once for a ticket, and once for my grandmother’s compensation hearing. And I also recently went was in the famous cathedral in NYC. On all three occasions I was asked to take off my hat. I acquiesed because I didn’t want to make a scene, but I felt reluctant because 1) it seems like a stupid thing that doesn’t matter and isn’t anyone else’s business 2) whatever ettiquette there was regarding it is in my experience no longer ever practiced in non formal situations 3) I felt it put me at a disadvantage in court because I had an unusual hair cut and 4) someone could have had a legitimate reason for wearing a hat such as for religious reasons or for being bald after cancer treatments or having a surgical scar.
I had some Orthodox Jewish friends in college who would sometimes wear baseball caps instead of a yarmukle, and I’ve seen some muslims wear a religious or cultural skull cap that doesn’t look much different from ‘street wear’ (not to mention the head scarf that some Muslim women wear) - so it’s not like the purpose of the hat is always obvious.
So I’m wondering what people’s experiences have been wearing religious head wear where it was obvious or not and what conflicts they have had or what have they done to avoid conflict, as well as other ‘legitimate’ needs for wearing hats such as post operative, cancer treatments, or even just privacy. I’m also wondering where the law stands on this issue, both for at court and also for whether places like schools and churches can have that amount of control of your dress code.
I’d say someone needs to put on their moderator hat and move this to its proper forum; either IMHO or MPSIMS.
That said, as far as the ‘famous cathedral’: in St. Patrick’s (or any other Catholic church) it is a sign of disrespect for men to have their heads covered (and for women to have their heads UNcovered.)
When I was a photographer for a local paper I would find myself in temples and churches quite often. I got into the habit of carrying a yarmulke in my camera bag (one that I knew would stay on my head, unlike the bar-mitzvah leftovers that most shuls keep on hand) and in churches I would remove whatever cap I had on (regardless of however bad my hair day was) because, even though I’m no longer a practicing Catholic, I still have my mother’s voice in my head.
Religion ain’t nuffin’. Just you wait until you see a vain guy wear a hat because he’s balding. A mate of mine wears a cap 24/7 because of this, and I never gave it much thought until we went into a bar with dress regulations that prohibited headwear, via a huge sign right at the door. My friend totally freaked. He ended up removing the cap, but he was extremely self-conscious, despite my honest assurances that I didn’t give a shit about his baldness.
For starters, Court should be considered a formal event. Wearing a hat in Court is innapropriate because it is disrespectful to the Court. For that matter, in my part of the world, gentlemen do not wear hats indoors. If you ever happen to see old clips from the Sugar Bowl, you’ll note the great Bear Bryant did not wear his famous houndstooth hat during the game…because he was inside the Superdome.
Count me as another teacher who requires all males to remove their hats in the classroom, except for religious exceptions. It’s rude, and I don’t like it.
I gave some background just so that my question would be understood (maybe more than was needed - if so sorry), but I’m not ultimately trying to state an opinion or share stuff. I’m asking if anyone with a legitimate need for covering their head has run into a conflict (or how things work), and I’m asking if the law makes allowances for such things. If someone wants to start an additional thread for the debating of the issues involved that’s cool and I might even participate, but I’d still like a real answer to those two questions. Thanks!
The problem is that many people have a strong feeling that it is rude or disrespectful, perhaps beaten into them from youth. They don’t stop to think about why they have that feeling, and that it might be culture-specific. Many “rules” of etiquette are based on emulating the behavior of small, homogeneous groups that aren’t representative of society-at-large.
