Renaming the planet Earth?

My choices are the following:

  1. War World

  2. Apokolips

  3. Planet X

Following the naming convention of sports stadiums, I’m thinking at some point in the future it will be either Time Warner Planet or Comcast Planet.


Since the Earth is female, I propose Helen Earth.


When Herschel discovered Uranus, he originally wanted to name it after King George III. His astronomer buddies talked him out of it, presumably because they thought having a planet called “George” would be a bit silly. Then again, “Uranus” is arguably even sillier, so who knows how their logic went.

Anyway. Bottom line (no pun): I still really want a planet called “George”. So that’s my vote.

George. And I will hug it, and squeeze it…

We could combine the suggestions for naming the planet Time Warner or Georgia and name it Ted Turner.

This one took me a while.

What ever language has the prettiest sounding word that means “Home”.



That just makes it even less likely for aliens to come visit.

And I want to meet aliens. Sure, they may wipe us out or enslave us, but at least it would be something new and interesting happening. And maybe they’ll be benevolent and help us cure cancer. Who knows?

So I’d go for something more attractive.


We have a problem with that.

Referring to Uranus as “The Georgian planet” was actually pretty common for a while

Dirt, Blackstuff.


They have a lot of moola.

Will Komta Earth.

There is some discussion of changing the name due to all the jokes. One it passes, the seventh planet will be known as “Urectum”.

As for our planet, I propose the following names:


Earth (a Walmart Company)

New York (since it’s at the center of the universe anyway)



For the sake of accuracy.

Another division of Koch Enterprises.


Because it’s already terraformed. All we have to do is not screw it up.