Don’t. Leave it open for a month. Yes, you have enough for the immediate stuff - but give people a chance to pass over some more if they can and want to.
I appreciate what you’re saying, Nava, but I already feel I’ve asked for too much! I considered adding the cost of a modest back-to-school wardrobe for the kids, and the (small amount of) property tax that comes due next month, but that felt so greedy - the difference between asking for a necessity and a luxury.
You’ve asked for just enough to get your nose out of the water. Please, please let us push you out until you’re at least dog-paddling! This kind of situation shouldn’t happen - but since it does, give anybody who wants to help a chance to do so. There’s other ways we can help, but most of them have their biggest effect on people we don’t know; this is for someone we know and love.
You might want to add another $2; someone upset the pot (no, it wasn’t me!).
I’ve had a couple of private discussions on this same subject, with people who know me from the board and IRL, but using similar logic to yours, Nava. When I get home shortly, I’ll adjust the goal amount by enough to keep a little cushion for the unexpected, pay those taxes, and make sure the kids look spiffy for school. A little breathing room probably would be a good thing, but I still feel like, if I’m asking for favors, I should be asking for a bologna sandwich and not a steak.
Okay - done. But that’s it! And y’all are all invited for peach ice cream and Eagle Creek beer next month!
I’m so glad you decided to leave this open. No reason to shut down an opportunity for all of us to feel good and for your kids to get a little nicer pair of shoes!
Do you guys wanna know what’s really, really thrilling?
Paying bills a day early, in full, rather than trying to decide how much I can pay on each thing to avoid loss of service. (And eating the late fees when I go back to pay that last bit!) And repeating that same exercise every week! Sure, it probably won’t replace roller coasters and extreme sports and teaching teenagers to drive for most thrill-seekers, but it works for me!
ARGH!!! It will take a few days for my CDO* to kick in, but yeah, that’s going to bother me every time I look.
We did good, I’m so proud to be a Doper.
(I also learned who was the one who made my CDO kick in before. Not from Lacunae Matata, but because I know her IRL and had sent her the link and a request for a few bucks.) She had just bought a rather pricy needlepoint piece and got the link. She said that she felt so guilty that she was “wasting” her money on needlepoint stuff when an injured cop’s family couldn’t pay their bills, that she gave the same amount. I’m really glad that the site doesn’t allow one to donate change, because the 32 cents she wanted to also give would have made my CDO kick in much faster.)
Lacunae Matata Your post really made my day. Us Dopers might be snarky and sarcastic and sometimes mean, but…sometimes we do really good and important things.
*In case nobody has heard this before, CDO is OCD with all the letters in the right order like they should be!
Done and fb’d.
Take care, Lacunae and family.
flatlined, you’ll be thrilled to note that someone tossed in those extra two bucks!
And everyone: do you know how wonderful it felt today to make an appointment for the Boy to get his oil changed? To tell Girl 2.0 that she should begin deciding what she needs for back-to-school, with a ballpark budget amount? To go shopping and pick up a few brand new clothes (on clearance, but still!) for the kindergartner (plus a sparkly new outfit for Littlest Miss, who isn’t going to school yet, but she’s worn hand-me-downs for her whole life, and a $7 top/capri outfit will make her as happy as a $70 one)? To know that I can buy the Boy good work boots, versus the cheapest thing from Walmart, when he begins his apprenticeship* in August? I’m literally teary-eyed over these things, and I have you guys to thank for the mascara running down my face!
*The local plant for a large, multi-national manufacturer has apparently realized that they need to attract younger, tech-savvy employees for the future, so they are starting an apprenticeship program this fall. The process included nominations from local high school teachers, a Round 1.1 meet and greet (to which parents were invited - we toured the plant and introduced ourselves and asked questions and such,) and then phone interviews to cut the nominees down by half. Then there was a face-to-face interview, and an aptitude test. The Boy made the cut, and is one of four chosen for the apprenticeship. He’ll work 16 hours per week, get two high school credits and a pretty generous hourly pay along with the experience. If his performance is satisfactory - and it will be, that kid is perfectly willing to work hard and work smart - he can work the same hours next year, with a good pay raise and an employer willing to work around his college schedule. The company will also reimburse 75% of his university tuition and books. They’ll do this for up to four years, which will pretty much get the Boy through his undergrad degree. His original intention was to do his undergraduate at Georgia Tech, but he’s planning now to stay at Hometown U, which offers a very good engineering program - just not top tier, like Ga Tech. He’ll then go to Atlanta for his Master’s. I’m so thrilled that he has this opportunity - practical experience in his chosen field along with the chance to get his degree with little or no student loan debt - and that he won’t be running off to the Big City quite yet!)
Hope you accept some dollars with weird pictures of antipodean fauna on them.
Can I ask just a question in general out of curiosity, while I don’t understand the intricacies of the US medical system but know a lot of people aren’t unhappy with it, but how the hell is it that an emergency services worker who gets injured on the job doesn’t have the best coverage for medical and better income protection? Is that just the way it is in the US? or was the PD skimping on coverage or something?
Anyway, Lacunae hoping you and your family back on your feet soon, and here’s hoping your hubby gets better.
Thank you to whoever kicked in the extra 2 bucks. It really was going to set my CDO off.
Lacunae your updates are making me tear up as well. I’m so glad that your nose is out of the water and I hope you can start dog paddling soon.
If someone gave you a gift card for Sketchers and of course that someone wasn’t me, can I suggest that you order the work boots now so the Boy can try them on for a few days and send them back if they don’t work out for him? A friend of mine had to try several different pairs before the right ones worked. But my friend loves the ones that worked and doesn’t want to ever wear anything else.
Cheap shoes are just cheap shoes. Good work boots are more expensive at the start, but they don’t have to be replaced every year and will save expensive foot problems in the future.
Did I miss something in HS Bio101?
Blah, I like my cheap boots with cardboard thin souls, helps to know where I am when it gets too foggy out.
I’m in. Looking good.
You had cardboard thin shoes? Luxury! I used to have to scavenge cardboard boxes just to have somewhere semi-warn to sleep.
Not only that, I used to walk barefoot in the snow to go to school because one of my sisters had her turn to wear the shoes. UPHILL! BOTH WAYS!!!
HEY! You hadn’t told us the Boy was a CIBORG!
No Boys needing oil changes here, but I do remember trying to decide what to put on my oh-so-boring daily pasta: a dab of ketchup, or half a chopped-up slice of bologna? Decisions, decisions…
It’s the way it is; there has been a tug-of-war over changing medical coverage for decades, but sometimes it’s more “of war” than “tug”. I’ve been following it since I moved there for the first time in 1994 and ran into it (thankfully my Dad had made sure I could read legalese). Like many things in the US, it’s an adversarial system: not only are you hurt or sick, but you need to fight for coverage. You get one of those illnesses that even penguins in Anctartica know come from being in the hospital? You still need to pay that same hospital through your nose, or sue them and win (which can take long enough for your then-newborn to get to college).
Honestly, I wish I could answer this question. I’ve had off-this-board discussions with other US-based emergency workers, and the whole situation would be quite different, apparently, if Tony’s wreck had happened in New York or California or Ohio versus Georgia. There’s a long, ugly history behind it, but labor unions aren’t nearly as welcome south of the Mason-Dixon Line as they are above it.
Here in Georgia, though, and absent any union agreement that trumps other regulations, a first responder who is injured in the line of duty receives worker’s compensation pay during his recovery - I think it’s a maximum of $525 now, but at the time of Tony’s wreck, the max is 2/3 of average weekly pay, up to $500 per week. For the first year, the state indemnity fund paid the difference between comp and Tony’s previous salary, but that’s only a one-year stopgap. I guess the assumption is that, after one year, the employee is either back at work or never going back.
In addition, there’s a two-year statute of limitations here on filing suit against a government entity for fault or liability in the event of something that causes a loss. The human resources department for the county Tony works for began disputing insurance claims at two years and one day - his wreck happened on December 28, 2012, and the first treatment that was disputed was the surgery scheduled for December 29, 2014. Fortunately, we hired a smart attorney, who filed paperwork that preserves our right to sue, extending that deadline. I think that the HR folks haven’t found that filing, or else they wouldn’t have started down this road. We may eventually be able to recover out of pocket expenses for Tony’s treatment that has been denied, but that’s uncertain. The insurance company has offered to settle the case, but that would include a caveat that they no longer cover any of his medical treatment. We just can’t take that offer.
I don’t think that Tony’s department was/is skimping. I just think that there aren’t enough good safeguards for employees of any stripe who are injured at work here in the US. The insurance companies and human resources departments seem to have more say-so in many events than the doctors and other medical professionals who are actually evaluating the events. And that’s the closest I’ll come to making a political statement in this thread.
The Boy has weird-shaped feet, plus some pronation issues, so we’re likely to go to a brick and mortar store for him to try on, unless we want to do five or six returns/exchanges. Fortunately, the uniform store that Tony generally uses carries an excellent line of boots that work for duck feet, and offer some corrective support for that specific issue, by way of an adjustable gel insert to support the side of the foot. These boots are generally $150-$200, but cheaper in the long run than ankle/knee/back issues, and they’re durable. I’m a big believer in good shoes, if at all possible!
Everyone’s a comedian, eh? But seriously - we were able to buy the little truck for $900, indirectly from a friend who’d used it in his carpet cleaning business. It’s a 1996 - actually 1995.5 - Toyota Tacoma, with about 260K miles on it. Reliable little truck, decent gas mileage, and worth maintaining. Heck, it had brand new (maybe 2000 miles) tires when we bought it - those cost almost what we paid! I’ve turned into my mother, lecturing the boy on fluids and tire pressure and crap. A little maintenance goes a long way, though, and I’ve told the kid that he can drive as far as he wants without gasoline, so long as he doesn’t drive low on oil, coolant, brake fluid, or transmission fluid! And we had no idea when we bought it, but apparently the truck has some value in the collector’s market - first branded Tacoma and all. Worth more than that as a daily driver, though. What kills me, though, is that the friend’s brother first purchased the truck for his own teenage son. That teenager flatly refused to accept this “piece of crap” truck, because it needed a new door handle and ignition switch, and the paint wasn’t shiny, and stuff.