True, but approximately 100% of cyclists think Beware of Dug can kiss my sweaty ass.
I feel obliged that while cyclists may (or may not) be upstanding americans, the bicycles themselves are decidedly unamerican. You’ve never seen one vote, have you? Heck, my bycicle was a registered member of the communist party, the bastard.
I hadn’t thought about the (let’s call them) superbikes. I have just one thing to say…
Fucking cool!!
Lame. Fine, I withdraw my epithet.
I’m going to start riding again now.
Get a single speed with a fixed gear ya big girl’s blouse.
Oh, fer Og’s sake, you wrote an edgy parody with no outward signs that is what you were doing. You expressed an opinion in no way crazy enough to be too crazy to be anything but parody. As the OP you got flamed in the role you chose to play. A number of posters took your post at face value, and several others weren’t sure. Get off **Knorf’s **back, he wasn’t doing anything unreasonable (by Pit standards).
Whoosh.
And yes, it was obvious parody. He’s a Doper who has been here a while and has not otherwise hated. This means it is not normal for him to condemn an entire class of people. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out it was a parody, just normal observation skills.
The main reason not to realize it was that so many people didn’t, so you start to think maybe they know something you don’t.
Meh. Everyone knows bikes are for those too lazy to walk.
Kiss my bicycle riding ass, and have fun paying $3 a gallon for petrol, dickface
I don’t know Beware of Doug much as a poster, and even if I never noticed shit-head behavior from him before–which I never have–that doesn’t mean much. It happens from time to time that someone who has otherwise seemed reasonable suddenly has an explosive, irrational, but sincerely felt rant about something that just really, really pissed them off that day.
Frankly, parodies work better when at some point it’s crystal-clear that it’s a parody, especially after it has towed you along for a bit. (For example, Stephen Colbert is terrific at this.) It was not obvious to most of us who posted in this thread that the OP was a parody.
In any case, wasn’t my epithet lurid enough to be clear that it wasn’t really 100% serious?
Nonetheless I accept my honorable mention, because I wasn’t sure whether the OP was a parody or not.
In your defense, lots of us really do hate bicyclists but not necessarily the bicycles themselves. There is a lot to hate there and I found myself getting angry just thinking about them when I read the OP and I even own a bicycle (but I keep it in the basement). It is the same thing with golf. I don’t think it should be outright banned but some things are better done in private and not on public property. You can hate the sin and still love the sinner as a wise man once said probably before bicycles were even invented. Bicycle pants are about the faggiest looking since..damnit, now I am more pissed off at soccer. Never mind.
That’s about the only thing you’ll ever get sucked.
Like Lance Armstrong, Ted will be spending an hour or two sitting on a thin hard seat, the padding in the arse of the bike shorts improve the comfort level. It’s actually kind of hard to find descent bike stuff that doesn’t have all the logos and shit (it’s one reason I don’t really have any proper bike clothes, I don’t want to have all the logos, not to mention feeling uncomfortable wearing professional clothes and riding at an amateur pace ;)).
These are truly dark days, and the ol’ sarcasm meter has taken some grave damage lately.
I know that, you know that. Everyone who posts here is supposed to know that? The OP put hook on a bait then whined when the line burnt his fingers when someone bit, IMO.
Not really. I have six or seven jerseys without logos. Admittedly there tends to be more stock with, than without, logos in trendy shops but it isn’t hard to find plain stuff at all. Check out any on-line cycling store and they will have any number of plain (admittedly lurid) coloured jerseys, and patterns.
Have fun scraping yourself off my bumper, you Commie 
Hmmmm. I remember the good old days (no, not really but what the heck) when “conservative” didn’t mean “Crazier than a peach orchard sow”
There’s one boy who’s half a sandwich shy of a picnic.
Bicycles do occupy an unhappy medium when it comes to transportation: they are too fast to safely operate on sidewalks, but are too slow and flimsy to operate along side cars, trucks, and buses. And creating dedicated bike trails isn’t possible in a lot of places due to space & cost concerns; bike lanes and a motor vehicle road are a poor substitute, since they are still right next to cars.
And for my stupid bicyclist story; yesterday as I was going down a three lane road (middle lane was a turning lane) I nearly hit this guy on a bike who rode right through a stop sign on a side road, who made a wide right turn and decided to ride down the middle turn lane for several blocks.