Restaurant Authenticity FAILS

Cafe Society
1

Obviously inspired by this thread, my mind turned to - well, a specific evening in Stockholm nearly twenty years ago. Two colleagues from a partner company took me out for the evening to sample the very latest thing - Stockholm’s first Tapas restaurant. They were very proud of it.

OK, I’ll cut to the chase. The highlight of the evening for me was a small bowl of mashed potato, across which an anchovy had been draped. That was it. Needless to say, it was unlike any tapa I have ever come across, before or since. A fascinating evening - a Swedish re-imagining of the cuisine. I can’t remember the name of the restaurant, but a quick search suggests that Stockholm now boasts TWO tapas restaurants; or rather two branches of the same (small) chain. Here’s the menu in English. (Link to the parent page, just in case). Note the Buffalo Wings (in hot bad ass sauce) and the Tempura. I love Sweden, I love the Swedes, and I’m sure this is all delicious. But authentic?

Being British I am aware that this is rather a case of living in a glass house and throwing stones. I was going to mention the British Pub Curry. But it’s too complicated. I’ll let someone else try. Apples. Shudder

So what have you got?

j

2

When I lived in Europe in the 80s, it was almost impossible to find an edible hamburger in a restaurant that wasn’t an American chain. I’m not sure what they put in them, but it wasn’t beef.

3

I was made to go to an Italian restaurant in Beijing once. Another time, I ordered ‘tacos’ in New Zealand.

In both cases, the food was prepared as if no recipe or other description of flavor was available, only a picture of the food item in question. The food looked right, but that was all. The NZ tacos were edible, the Chinese Italian was a total horror show.

4

In Japan, on the other hand (or at least in Tokyo), you can find a lot of western foods prepared well.

5

“Cajun” restaurants whose idea of Cajun is blackened anything and throwing a bunch of spices on anything that wasn’t blackened.
They seem to have mostly died or the owners are chasing the latest fad.

I give a bit of a pass to Cajun restaurants who serve good Creole food on the grounds that most of their customer don’t know any better.

6

have you seen what they do to pizza in Japan?

7

Did anyone else think that independent burger bars in Britain often smelled like actual shit, until around the mid 80s? The burgers as well, they actually smelled a bit like shit.

8

No, but after living in Micronesia and Indonesia no pizza topping would surprise me. Corn, shrimp and barbecue sauce are among the least odd non-traditional toppings I’ve encountered. Bananas and wontons may be the weirdest.

9

I am always very amused when visiting an ethnic restaurant in the Upper Midwest and other extremely white areas (e.g. Maine, Montana) and are served by caucasians. Like that Indian restaurant in a town somewhere between Portland and Acadia National Park in Maine where I was the only actual Asian in the building, or that time I bought Chinese takeout from a blue-eyed, blonde-haired teenager in Missoula. Their “oriental” decor consisted entirely of a few Hello Kitty stickers on the wall.

That said, the food itself was fine. It wasn’t “authentic” by any stretch of the imagination (and good luck getting anything actually spicy out of them), but it was edible. I’ve been served worse Indian and Chinese food by actual Indian and Chinese people.

10

I went to some “Mexican” restaurant near Binghamton NY sometime in the 1990s, ordered a plate of nachos, and whatever the hell it was that I got, made me leave the restaurant immediately, without paying. Just. Left.

11

My stick-in-the-ass uncle was visiting us in Knoxville, TN, and he was going through yet another health-food kick, this time Thai restaurants. Insisted we take him to the best Knoxville had to offer, the more authentic, the better.

Well, there were a few. Found one, not too far from our house. Kind of a hole in the wall, had cheap tables and chairs, and a paper menu, but every fucking person in that place was Asian-American, and the name of this place… for the purposes of this thread… was Real Fucking Thai Food Cooked by Thais for Thais.

Holy mother of God, did my uncle hate that place! Just complained and whined and did what it was that made being with him just such a delight and joy.

So my sister tried. Took him to Suburban Chain Thai. Well lit. Lot’s of white people. No asians. Plastic menus, cute 20-something hostesses, the full suburban chain experience, complete with new tables and American beers.

“Wow. I am impressed. This is the sort of Thai restaurant you would find in New York City. This is truly nice. Look, Peg, they have <something that wasn’t really Thai>.”

I burst out laughing. “Holy Hell, Bruce, there’s not a single asian person in this place, it’s full of after-church white baptists. This is Americanized Thai food, not real Thai food like that place we went to last night.”

BiL: “Y’all went to Real Fucking Thai Food Cooked by Thais for Thais? You have to be Thai to like that place.”

Waving my hands, looking at my uncle, “To my point!”

12

Never pay to eat hot dogs someplace that does not have (a) an outfield or (b) at least 6 motorcycles in the parking lot.

13

I’ve had some damn good hotdogs at golf courses…

14

The first Mexican restaurant in my hometown was opened by a family at the end of my street. They most definitely were not Hispanic. I don’t know who they hired to work in the kitchen.

The food, Tex-Mex was similar to El Chico and very good. They were still open when I left for college.

15

About the OP’s mention of the incongruity of a Swedish tapas restaurant, I find the tapas concept very similar to a smorgasbord, which is very Scandinavian. The only difference is that the food is brought to the table by a server as opposed to being chosen from a buffet. Maybe the Swedish food sucked, but it wasn’t inauthentic.

We have a few odd fusion places on Devon Avenue in Chicago. Italian/Chinese, Indian/New York Pizza…

As for inauthentic hot dogs, maybe some Dopers may remember when McDonald’s tried to sell them?

16

I was on a road-trip deep in the Heart of Texas, and stopped for Mexican food. They brought out chips and salsa (chips were stale and straight out of a store-brand bag, I saw it sticking out of the trash, same with the salsa I’m sure) and the entrée was some kind of microwave, flavorless crap. Dry, freezer-burned and just nasty. Worst Mexican food I’ve ever had.

Deep in the Heart of Texas.

17

Don’t order the “authentic American” cheesecake at Chili’s in Riga. It has sponge cake instead of a Graham cracker crust, what would seem to be whipped cream cheese, and a coating of a Jell-O-like substance on top.

Haven’t been to any other Chili’s, so I can’t vouch for its offerings elsewhere.

18

I was visiting Akumal, Mexico several years ago and noticed a “steak sandwich” on the menu, so curiosity got the best of me and I ordered it. It was a large single piece of flank steak, served between two pieces of white bread. Well, they were technically correct.

19

A cappuccino in rural Australia - coffee-flavoured milk, with whipped cream on top.

20

I remember going to an AMERICAN HAMBURGER JOINT in Brighton, England, called Cagney’s, where the decor heavily featured some 1930s Hollywood actor or other. :rolleyes:

The food wasn’t really bad, but it sure wasn’t American, either. :frowning:

On the other hand, one of the best pizzas I’ve ever had was also in Brighton: a simple little pie topped with anchovies and capers, absolutely delicious. This might somehow have been due to the proprietor-and-chef being Sicilian. :wink: