I hear a lot of silly requests and misconceptions in my retail job and I also enjoy sharing and hearing about them. I’m sure this has been done here before and there are whole websites devoted to the subject but i thought I’d share the latest.
A customer seeking an audio compatible snowsports helmet and chips asked if we carried wired chips. She did not want the wireless chips I showed her because she “doesn’t want Bluetooth in my head.”
A customer shopping for recreational solar panels and chargers picks up a charger for AA and AAA NiMH cells which can be used to charge rechargeable devices asks several staff if he can use alkaline batteries in it. When he didn’t like the answer that each person gave him, he called customer service for the brand and right there in the aisle on speakerphone got the exact same answer: theoretically, yes, but the product wasn’t designed for that, such usage voids the warranty, and why would you do that? His answer was if he were going to carry spare batteries that have a charge already. Advice was to carry spare NiMH and charge them as needed either via USB to external power source or a solar panel that the company you just called was founded to sell. Turns out his son told him the same thing before he left the house and he was looking for someone to give him the answer he wanted to hear.
While I try to avoid making a customers feel belittled for their ignorance, I struggle with how to set them straight in a polite but effective manner. Still the frustration is mild and the entertainment is worth it.
You probably know about it but if you don’t, there is Tales from Retail on Reddit. I’m retired and never worked retail but I often peruse it for entertainment. And I ALWAYS treat retail people with the respect they deserve.
I love the battery story. He’s looking at buying a battery charger but wants to know if he can use non-rechargeable batteries in it! And won’t take no for an answer.
I think I’ve shared this one before.
Got a call transferred to me from the appliance department from an irate customer who would only talk to a manager. Seems he bought a washing machine from us and when he got it home it was the wrong color. He said that there was no way in hell he was bringing it back and that we needed to drop everything, get a delivery truck, and bring him the right one right NOW!
I told him he needed to calm down if I was to help him and I needed some info from him.
“What color did you want?”
“WHITE!”
“Okay, what model number is on your receipt?”
“123456W!”
“Okay, what model number is on the box?”
“123346W!”
“Okay, and what color is the unit?”
“PINK!”
“…did you say pink?”
“YES, IT’S PINK! NOW WHEN THE HELL WILL YOU BRING ME THE RIGHT ONE!”
“…Sir, that’s just a protective film on the unit. Find the edge on it and it should peel right off.”
“WHAT! HOLD ON A SECOND!..
…
… nevermind” (click)
Oh, gosh yes, retail - some of the customers are just whack. Most of them are just fine. Working in that area has been educational in both good and bad ways.
Ah, yes. The customer who will ask you if you have something. “I’m sorry, we don’t carry that item.” So they go ask someone else. “No, we don’t have it.” Lather, rinse, repeat.
I had the following telephone conversation on Monday December 26th:
Customer: Are you open today?
Me; Yes, until 10:00.
C: Were you open yesterday?
Me: Yes, from 9 to 10
C: You were open yesterday?
Me; Yes.
C: Christmas Day.
Me; Yes.
C: You were open yesterday on Christmas Day?
Me: Yes, we were.
C: On Christmas Day you were open?
Me; Yes, we-were-open-on-Christmas-Day.
C: Oh (hangs up)
This is from my daughter, who worked in a store called Intima. They sold women’s intimate apparel, bathing suits, that kind of stuff.
Two guys come in.
Daughter: “Can I help you?”
Guy #1: “I want to buy a bra for my wife.”
Daughter: “OK, what size?”
Guy #1: “I don’t know.”
Daughter: “Well, I can’t really help you if you don’t know her bra size.”
Guy #1 than holds his hands in front of him, palms facing up, then turns them over, does this a few times, and says, “You know, like about this big.”
My poor daughter had to walk away to keep from laughing in the guy’s face. Then he and his buddy went outside to look in the display window, and apparently had a discussion about if the mannequin was the same size as the wife. He ended up saying he’d come back when he had the size.
Me: For your travels in Europe, you will need a set of plug adapters and this voltage converter.
Mom: Ok
Kid: You don’t need the voltage converter thing, remember that trip I took? I didn’t need one then.
Mom: We’ll just take the plug adapter set
Me: You really do need the voltage converter as well.
Mom: No, thank you, just the plug adapters
Mom to Kid: Say, was that the trip where your hairdryer caught on fire?
Me: head explodes
To be fair, it was years before I realized my microwave had a protective film over the buttons. I had assumed that the surface was just wearing out, and had to remember which button was which. Then, when I moved, I had the whole thing wrapped in tape to secure it, and when I took the tape off, oh, how about that?
And it’s food service, not retail, but my favorite minimum-wage story was about someone who came up to my counter and asked for an order of extra cheese. It was right there on the menu board, after all: Extra cheese 25 cents.
OTOH… I bought new phones for our teens this Xmas, and picked up two new-in-box Galaxy S5s from a reputable dealer on Swappa. Just because I could, I ordered one white and one black.
I got two white phones. I let the dealer know but waived any fix… it just wasn’t that important, especially as both live in garish cases anyway.
So the day after Xmas I pull up Verizon to make sure the phones registered properly and so forth… and according to the IMEI/serial #/SIM data, one phone is white and one is black. So the mislabeling goes right back to the factory.
And sometimes it’s your retail coworkers that are the problem.
I worked nights and weekends in the Tool World/Hardware dept. at Lowes while I was in A&P school. One day, I had a customer come into the TW asking me about wet saws for tile. At least in my store, the wet saws were in the flooring department, in the same aisle as the other flooring tools. So, I told him which aisle and which side they were on, and he proceeded to let me know, in a not-so-nice manner, how weird it was that I would say that, since the associate at the flooring desk had just told him that all the tools are in the Tool World.
So we went for a walk together to the flooring tools aisle, and I showed him the 3 different models of wet saws we carried… in the flooring tools aisle… with ALL the other flooring tools. To his credit, the customer then apologized for his rudeness, and made a comment about how he now knew who not to trust in the store.
After the customer picked the saw he wanted and left the area, I pointed out the flooring tools aisle to the flooring department associate for his future knowledge. He looked dumbfounded to discover what was in the aisles of his own department…
IME, the people staffing the department desks are either (1) former contractors or workers in that industry who have forgotten stuff you’ll never learn, or (2) “You! New guy! Jones! You’re ‘Flooring’ today.”
I’ve always said…“the customer is always an idiot.”
I’ve worked in retail, and the worst customers are gas station customers.
customer: Where is your deli?
me: Sorry, We don’t have one.
customer: You used to about 25 years ago. You don’t have it anymore?
me: No, sorry, this gas station has only been open for ten years. The gas station up the road has been open for about 25 years. They have a deli. You could try them.
customer: No it was this one. Why are you lying?
she then proceeds to describe the other gas station, even their red, yellow and green colors (ours was blue, red and white) and storms out of the store.
