Heh heh. “Probed”
OK, I’m done. While that was a soul-sucking intro, it reminds me of Gilbert Gottfried’s act at the roast for Hugh Hefner. (Wiki link if you don’t remember.) If a comedian can make people laugh within a week of 9/11, a good comedian should be able to do it after VT.
Of course, that does nothing to associate Rich Little with the phrase “Good Comedian”, but if they would have had someone decent s/he could have worked with it.
According to David Corn:
Hmm. I wonder who?
That proves how much he sucks. Dy-no-MITE must be thrown at him every night. You would think that in 20-30 years he would come up with at least one good comeback.
So the VA Tech shootings left Bush unable to bring teh funny, but all the soldiers dying in Iraq didn’t stop his “Gawrsh, where are those pesky WMDs?” act a few years ago. Gotcha.
One of those damned if you do damned if you don’t. If he tried to be funny as is traditional then there would be a pit thread about that.
Jimmy Walker for one. But negotiations broke down over the extra “dy-no-mite” fee.
I’m picturing him opening his jacket, with a whole bunch of explosives strapped to his chest. “I got your DY-NO-MITE right here, bitches!” and then cackling insanely.
ETA: What about Jon Stewart? He could do his Dubya laugh - hehhehheh. That always slays me.
Oh, yeah, they’d hire Jon Stewart. Right about the same time Karl Rove staples his foreskin to his desk and pulls the desk out of his office. Would I pay to see either of those? Oh, hell, yes!
I understand they started to go with a hip young black comic, but while Willie Tyler agreed to play nice, Lester wanted to make Katrina jokes.
As for Little, I think you’re selling him short. Sure, in his safe little cocoon of a cable show Stephen Colbert is witty and hip, but think he could pull down a Love Boat appearance and not lose ground to notorious scene stealer Lauren Tewes? Can Colbert pepper his repertoire with true and funny stories of sharing a dressing room with Wayland Flowers & Madame? Just how many “Truman Capote as Tiny Tim/Tricky Dick as Jacob Marley” hit Christmas Carol recordings has little Stevie made? And if you’ve ever heard Colbert sweat and mangle his way through a John Cameron Swayze Timex ad parody you’d appreciate just how not little Rich Little’s talents are.
I’ve had the theme to Match Game in my head ever since I opened this thread.
Hard to guess. The set of all comics edgier than Rich Little contains all comics who aren’t Rich Little.
oh come on now, you exaggerate - some comics are dead, ya know.
Back in the day- maybe '86- I was working as a stagehand for one of the Atlantic City casinos. One weekend Rich Little was the headliner. I remembered watching his schtick growing up, on such entertainment powerhouses of the day as The Captain and Tenille, Dinah Shore, and The Muppet Show, and thought- hey! Rich Little. I remember this guy!
Man, he was the most personality-free guy I’ve ever met, before or since. We had a few dress and tech rehearsals before the weekend, then 4 or 5 shows over the weekend, and most of the time he wasn’t on stage I was no more than six feet from him backstage. He was duller than dull- no pleasantries, no conversation, no chit chat- either with me or anyone else around him. I don’t think it was nerves either, or that he was a prick- I’ve been around plenty of performers before and after their shows and none of them acted like this guy. It was suddenly clear why his whole act was comprised of impersonations of other people- because he had no personality of his own. He was just bland.
The “jokes” he told while in character weren’t even all that funny; the audience laughed more out of recognition than humor. Kind of sad, really. I guess the only way you can guarantee not to offend anyone at a Correspondents Dinner is to not have any material more topical than 1990, if that.
Yeah, and what’s edgier than that?
“Now presenting – Richard Pryor as channeled by John Edward!”
Honestly, I’m surprised somebody hasn’t actually tried it.
Though now that I think about it, that might be a funny gimmick for an act.
AND NOW:
Lenny Bruce (as channeled by Whoopie Goldberg’s character in Ghost)
I love how Bush begins with his “now serious folks… let’s give each other love” smarminess about how it’s essential and great that in a free society we can actually make fun of our leaders.
Then he introduces Rich Little. Because at last year’s free society make fun of a leader dinner the mean old guest hurt his feewin’s.
Don’t give him ideas. In the post 9/11 climate . . . well, at least it would get his name in the headlines for the first time since Good Times . . .
And Rich Little ensuckens their balls! 
In fairness to Rich Little (I wonder why he never went with “Dick?”) ensuckening live donkey balls can be extremely perilous, as anyone who’s tried will affirm.
Rip Taylor?
Too dangerous. If he tried his “bucketful-of-confetti” bit there, he’d be tackled by a dozen secret service agents and shipped off to Gitmo.