Kyomara, I understand the feeling of “I know I should, but it feels so much better without one” and I’m a female. It takes a lot of self-control to make sure you have one on every time, and my willpower to make sure is the thought of me getting pregnant and having to drop out of college or find a way to get rid of the pregnancy… both are things I never want to have to go through. Just start using them, no matter how much more you like it without 'em. You’ll be much safer in the long run… and get tested too. You never know what you could’ve caught in those moments where you’ve let your guard down.
Been there, done that. I love my son to death, too. He’s going to be a mathematician one day, I think.
I was always really careful, absolutely always used a condom. But that was before I finally dated someone for more than three months. I wasn’t prepared for the way certain precautions just start to go out the window, I guess.
Oh for pete’s sake. You’re 25? I had you pegged for 17. Go to the doctor, get some pills or an IUD, and THEN start enjoying yourselves.
It’s not that hard to just get her on birth control.
Kyomara, it’s not a form of birth control at all.
Even if you pull out “before you blow,” as someone else put it, you still leak seminal fluid well before that point.
Babies are wonderful. They are also incredibly time-consuming and life altering. And they deserve to be wanted. Please use a valid form of birth control until you’re ready to take on the responsibility. (And, even if you feel that you might choose to walk away from a possible baby — which is relatively simple for the male partner ----- try asking someone how much child support payments are some time. It’s a very sobering thought, which should be taught in the math classes at school.)
(And, not meaning to be insulting, tuckerfan, but I second the idle speculation that you may be infertile/have a low sperm count/or have predominantly had infertile partners.)
A story:
My best friend & her man used the pull-out method for a while(six months, maybe) before she went on BC. I found out they weren’t using condoms, etc., 'cause I happened to ask what BC they were using.
She then (sheepishly) told me, and that she knew it was risky, but it was a heat of the moment thing, passion and all that. I wanted to smack her, of course.
She later had two pregnancy scares before going on the Pill. When she told me of her second scare, she wondered aloud if maybe she should get a test. She dawdled all day, avoiding having to buy said test. I, edgy for her, bought it myself, shoved her into the bathroom, and found out that it was negative. She finally woke up and went on the Pill soonafter.
Do you want to risk even a pregnancy scare? I was only a potential auntie, but was still a wreck while we waited for the results. I love her, but if she couldn’t get up the nerve to go buy a test, how was she going to react if she were, indeed, pregnant? Truth be told, though, I couldn’t blame her. I used the pull-out method exactly once, and the fear of pregnancy I had was enough to convince me never to have unprotected sex unless I’m willing to risk pregnancy.
If you continue to use this method, you’d better make damn sure that you’re ready for nervousness/to be a daddy.
If you’re asking this question you’re asking for it. Don’t.
As I stated, I do try to ensure that I have a low sperm count, and I may very well be sterile, not having produced any kids, I can’t say. Only time will tell, I suppose.
Other than friedo, it appears that most folks wish to continue to spread misconceptions, then to address the OP with facts.
First, withdrawal IS a method of birth control. If you don’t like the FDA link provided above, check out Planned Parenthood. For a comparison of effectiveness, see this (this appears to be the same data as the FDA page, but presented a little differently).
If you look at the data, you will see that Withdrawal is only marginally less effective than condoms. It is MORE effective than the diaphragm, the cervical cap, spermicide (alone), and the calendar rhythm method. SOME rhythm (predicting fertility) methods are MORE effective than Withdrawal OR Condoms. Suprising? Well, it surprised me…
The pill is much more effective, but it does carry other health risks/side effects, and can’t be considered a panacea.
Withdrawal, with imperfect use, leaves you at about a 19% chance of conceiving in the first year of use. If you are not ready to have children, that is a pretty substantial risk. If you find other (more effective) forms of birth control impractical, I would suggest combining Withdrawal with a rhythm method (only use withdrawal when rhythm would predict infertility). Notice that only abstinence has a perfect record.
I realize this isn’t General Questions, but the amount of misinformation posted above is disheartening.
Tuckerfan, I’m not sure what you are referencing about lowering your sperm count. Short of ingesting radioactive material, I’m not sure what might actually work. If, by chance, you are referring to masturbation prior to sex, you’re deluding your self.
I think he’s saying he…uh…uses…uh…herbal remedies? Ya know…a little of the old wacky tabaccky?
Or wearing tight briefs. I’ve heard (but have no hard data) that briefs raise the testicles’ temperature enough to reduce sperm production.
Well, I don’t have a cite, but I don’t think that marijuana use or tight underwear would be considered a reasonable birth control methods.
Anecdotally, I personally know many dopers (and I don’t mean Straight Dopers) with large families. I don’t know much about their choice of underwear, however.
They might have changed the laws, but last I heard, the Pill has still not been approved for use in Japan, where Kyomara is.
Not much of an excuse to use no birth control, though.
Kyla, they finally gave in back in 2000.
:eek: Why? They don’t have any room for more babies over there.
Yeah, the pill is available. I’ve heard horror stories about side effects from female friends who have had really bad reactions to it, though.
Nope, it’s condoms for me from now on. Assuming she’s not already pregnant.
Thanks for all the responses. What I’m getting here is that the pull-out method is a valid form of birth control, but there are enough people here for whom it has failed and I’d rather not add my name to that list.
No.
While I have used some of the wacky tabaccky, that’s not what I was referring to. And since the rest is TMI, I’ll put it in a spoiler box.
Nope, I was referring to masturbation before sex. Since a man’s sperm count drops below the critical threshold after 3 ejaculations in a 24 hour period, and given that I generally have that many before I’d see my girlfriend, followed by a long piss, any sperm that might remain in my urethra after masturbating are flushed out or dead. The rest are, apparently, too few in number to cause any havoc. Of course, now that I’ve said this, watch my next girlfriend get knocked up the first time we sleep together.
IAC, it’s not like I have much choice. I am unable to climax whilst sheathed (and believe me, I’ve tried for literally hours to do so), and none of my girlfriends have been willing to take any form of birth control (be it the pill, spermicide or what have you) even though I’ve offered to pay for it.
Er…YES. As outlined in AZCowboy’s first post to this thread. Certainly not the most effective form of birth control, but a valid on all the same.
Not that I feel I should defend it. I’m just saying.