I didn’t really have any problems getting around Turkey. Although, Sweden does have møøse. And a wøndërful telephøne system. So that might tip the scales.
I’ll second this one. Keukenhof has the bonus of both beautiful flowers and tons of walking.
Brussels is also good, I loved the day I spent in Ghent and am looking for an excuse to go back again.
I personally tend towards the hot/water sports side of traveling so I’ll leave more recommendations to the others.
Sounds like England would be a good bet.
Gardening is a national obsession, it is more cold than hot, and there is tons of history-stuff everywhere; and of course, English is occasionally spoken - albeit the regional accents may take some getting used to. 
If nothing has tickled your fancy yet, and all else fails, try this.
Outside of countries where English is the primary language, Scandinavia is one of the easiest places in the world to travel. English is widely spoken, everything is orderly and clean, crime is very low, they drive on the right side of the road, and outside of the cities the roads are uncrowded. There is a nice combination of history, culture, and scenery. It’s different enough to be exotic but familiar enough to be comfortable.
English spoken, history - I was also thinking that London would be good.
Definitely the Netherlands - they speak English better than we do, or at least with a nicer accent (gotten from watching BBC shows.) I spend five days in Copenhagen and language was never a problem. English language tours and guides are very prevalent. I only spent a day in Stockholm, but want to go back.
In Eastern Germany a lot of the older people learned Russian in school, but in Western Germany they all learned English. My daughter got a Masters in Business from a German university which was all done in English. She also helped with a multinational committee about European schools for which all meetings and reports were done in English - though no one was from an English speaking country.
So don’t worry. The world seems to have been designed for people like me - English speakers who suck at learning other human languages.
For what it’s worth Luanda fits that description. We have plenty of room and welcome visitors to* O DrumBum Casa*. We speak English with a subtle New England accent and happy hour begins promptly at 1830h on Friday. The sort of mayhem and murder that seems to be commonplace in the USA is quite rare, so the only threats here are malaria and food poisoning.
We have cats however, so you must defer to their demands…
If hiking etc. is your thing then I’m a huge fan of the Austrian mountains and lakes. We ski here (I’m there now) and spend several weeks each summer out here.
Very cheap, easily accessible, wonderfully set up for tourists and some of the best hiking in the world.
(plus the beer is great and there is a better than even chance of seeing unironic busty maidens in dirndls)
Should you want any specific recommendations, feel free to PM me.
I don’t think the “place” is the key factor in “easy”. You can have a crazy trip to Canada, hitchhiking and coach surfing with no agenda. And you can have a very easy trip in Zambia, ushered along on a well coordinate package tour. “Easy” is mostly a function of planning, travel style and money, not location.
I’d suggest flying to a place and staying there. IMHO, 99% of travel hassles are related to trying to see too many locations in a short time. Every minute you spend waiting for trains, checking in, unpacking, re-packing, etc. is time you are being stressed out rather than time enjoying your destination. Even for experienced travelers, it’s so much richer when you can actually get to know a place.
Choose a place and spend at least a week or so there. Find a favorite coffee shop to relax at every morning. See the minor sites. Go to the local high school talent show. Rent a bike a go around the countryside. Spend time people watching in parks. Make sure you have enough time just to hang out, and not to feel guilty if you aren’t on the go every second.
If you can handle slightly quirky accommodations, try staying at a boutique hotel or nice guesthouse (lots of reviews available online, so it’s easy to choose a nice one). IMHO, it’s easier to make friends with the staff and other travelers at smaller hotels, and they are better at providing advice targeted at the laid back traveler who isn’t focused on just hitting tourist sites.
Planning ahead can take a lot of the stress out of things, but be careful not to over plan. You don’t want to feel like your vacation is full of appointments. For example, you might research what kind of actives or tours are available, but hold off on booking until you arrive.
You could hitchhike thru the drug-cartel-controlled states in Mexico. They don’t speak English & there’s a high likelihood of being kidnapped & beheaded but on the plus side you can get cervezas when you want.
Egad man, if you want him to come to Angola, give the guy some positives!
18:30??? Don’t you believe in 5 o’clock like civilized beings??? :eek:
DCnDC many of the major cities in W Europe should be able to accommodate you as enough people speak English that you won’t be totally lost.
You don’t say how old you are. I’m pushing the boundary of crossing over into “old-fartdom”. If you are, say, over 50, then I have a recommendation for you. I’d highly recommend Overseas Adventure Travel.
My preferences: To me, a vacation should be carefree. I don’t want to deal with all of the logistics of finding a hotel, finding a decent place to eat, arranging transportation, having to drive in an unfamiliar environment, etc. I like the “here’s my money. You take care of just about everything else” - type of vacation, with the added benefit of being with a small group to interact with, share experiences, etc.
I’ve been on 5 trips with OAT: Thailand, Costa Rica, Iceland, Peru, and Spain. I’ve enjoyed all of them, some of them extremely highly.
OAT runs many different tours, all with a maximum of 16 people. You have enough time to get to know everyone a little. You have a lot of guided time, but also some free time to explore on your own. (We took a tuk-tuk on our own in Thailand. Now THAT was an adventure! ). I’ve also found that I see at least 4-times as much as I’d see on a guided tour, but at a much lower stress level.
Now, if you’re in your 20’s, this might not be for you. The people tend to be the “active over-50 crowd”.
I know I sound like a shill for them, but I have no relation with OAT other than as a customer.
J.
Yes, that’s exactly what I’m trying to avoid. Unfortunately my wife inherited the “planning gene” from her mother. As much as she tries to fight it, she can’t help it. I just want to go somewhere new and have fun with as little hassle as possible, and maybe I’ll see some cool shit along the way.
I’m open to doing some of the dumb planned stuff; I’m good-natured and can have a sense of humor about stupid touristy stuff. It has amusement value to me as camp, but I hate being shuffled around on a tight itinerary like it’s an elementary school field trip. There’s nothing I have to see. I just want to hang out, have a drink with some locals, maybe make a few friends.
My wife and I are both 37.
Really? 37? I got the distinct impression that you were older.
37 is plenty young enough to be a bit adventurous about this. Book some tickets somewhere, go a little bit young person style crazy. 
Sounds a lot like Bavaria (other than the beach part). Cooler climate, gorgeous scenery, a shitload of hiking trails in the Alps, outstanding beer, and Hitler’s retreat. Munich, Chiemsee Castle, Dachau, with Salzburg, Austria right across the border and Schloss Neuschwanstein nearby.
Way too young for the ‘cranky old man’ vibe you are putting out. I’ll retract my New Zealand recommendation and suggest some Botswana game preserves instead.
Here’s a good compromise. Lots of cities in Europe have free (but tip your guide) walking tours. I’ve one them in London, Berlin and Copenhagen. They last a few hours, let you see a lot of the city on foot, give you background and orient you. Then you can visit interesting places on your own.
As for lodging, I’ve stayed in little hotels, in hostels, and in a nice AirBnB place in Copenhagen. They all were relatively inexpensive and close to the city center and/or the Metro.
If you like motor vehicles, go to The Hague for the Louwman Museum, which houses one of the best automotive collections on the planet.
That’s what I thought too. I figured they were in their 60s.
A Caribbean cruise is about as safe and easy as it gets, but it will be totally touristy.