Straight woman, I’ll share any food so long as it’s done in conditions I deem hygienically acceptable.
Asking “may I try it” or to share it, OK. Any utensils used to portion up food must be previously unused.
Taking a piece of my cake with your already-used spoon and asking “do you mifff?” as it enters your mouth, the rest of the cake gets shoved back. Dunking your already-bitten piece of bread into my sauce, the rest of the dish gets shoved back. Some people should eat out of a trough! (Extra malus points if you do this when I know you’re having gastric problems or have a rampaging tooth).
Oh, I guess I missed the important point: heterosexual male. I don’t even mind the forks or spoons being previously used. I mean, among male friends, we rather routinely try beers from each other’s glasses, so that’s not a big deal, and that’s involving more saliva than a spoon or fork dipping into my dessert. Now, that doesn’t mean I’m going to be wanting to share an ice cream with you, necessarily, but I’m fine with using used utensils. Hell, I’m pretty sure I’ve offered and had other males use my fork before.
I’m not a dessert hoarder so they can have whatever desert pops up, but if a guy asked me, with his lips all pursed up like he’s anglin’ for smooch yeah… that’d be kinda queer and I’m not down with that. Look, I’m not a hateful person or anything—I believe we should all live and let live. But lately, I’ve been having a real problem with these homos. You see, just about wherever I go these days, one of them approaches me and ask to share my dessert.
Take last Tuesday, for instance, when I casually struck up a conversation with this guy at the other table down at the diner. Nothing fruity, just a couple of fellas talking about their favorite desserts while enjoying a hot cup of coffee. The guy looked like a real man’s man, too—big biceps, meaty thighs, thick neck. He didn’t seem the least bit gay. At least not until he started asking for a bite of my dessert that is.
I swear, if these homosexuals don’t take a hint and quit macking on my flan all the time, I’m going to have to resort to drastic measures—like maybe pinning them down to the table with my powerful forearms and spoon feeding them and kissing them like they were little babies, so they understand loud and clear just how much I disapprove of their unwelcome advances. I mean, you can’t get much more direct than that
Gay man, I will share a desert with anyone and have done so in the past. There is nothing sexual or romantic about a desert to me. It’s funny how even the straight guys here who have posted to admit to doing it still acknowledge that it feels funny or may look funny. I’ve never even given it a 2nd thought.
There were two points in my post other than sex though: whether people ask and hygiene. For some reason, the people I know who are most likely to grab other people’s food without asking are also those most likely to be sick. It’s probably related: after all, those who don’t invite themselves are the same ones who won’t kiss or shake hands if they have a cold.
Actually my roomie Phlip [Philippa] {who is a farrier} and I have a deal, I like the lobster tails, she likes the front half especially if it has the egg sack - so when we do our annual lobster dinner, we split the lobsters so I get all the tails and she gets all the front halves, and we frequently will split dessert [I am diabetic and she is not, she will go get herself a second dessert]
I travel frequently with a male friend. We go on several trips* a year, mainly places that hold no interest for our wives. We eat out together, but neither of us has a huge appetite so (oddly I guess) we usually share the desert. This involves putting the slice of pie or whatever in the center of the table and working on it from each end. We leave a small hygienic barrier of food in the middle that isn’t consumed.
*We flew to South Dakota 2 weeks ago to tour a missile silo. Prior to that was the Bradbury Science Museum at Los Alamos. None of this stuff appeals to our spouses.
I wouldn’t share. It would feel weird to even offer. I wouldn’t share an entree either. Appetizers are different because they are often ordered for the table by design but even in cases where that wasn’t the case I wouldn’t and don’t hesitate to offer one of whatever I have as an App. For the rest of the meal, I guess it is just a strange intimacy that doesn’t feel right. Stupid, but there it is.
I wouldn’t have any problem sharing, but both me and IMO most of the “stereotypical” straight men I know just aren’t really into dessert. The treat portion of the meal would be another beer or something like the aforementioned wings instead of something sweet, expensive and tiny. It could just be that the chances of two straight men both wanting dessert in the first place are somewhat slimmer than two gay men.
Bisexual, subject to the usual bisexual erasure in the poll options. :mad:
FWIW, though, I’ve had almost exclusively male friends throughout my life, and have never hesitated to share dessert with them. It’d be weird if we didn’t split it onto separate plates, but that’d go for a lady friend as well. Sharing from the same plate is moving into a significant other sphere of intimacy, to me.
The real question here, of course, is whether restaurants should be required to install private booths to ensure that any straight men who might be uncomfortable being in a restaurant with gay/bisexual men who might be checking out the straight men’s desserts can escape those leering eyes.
(Also, David Sedaris should be banned from public performance. His material isn’t bad; his delivery is insufferably smug/pretentious. He’s on a short list of people/classes of people (read: “adorable kids”) who will cause me to turn off This American Life.)
It’s tough being a straight guy. You spend years being sexually attracted to women, but if you split a dessert with another guy, boom, you’re gay. So no, I wouldn’t split a dessert with another man. However I would prostitute myself to someone of either sex in exchange for dessert.
