Santa's bringing me an Ultrasound and Mammogram

I went this afternoon for my yearly GYN exam. No biggie, right?

My new GYN found a quarter sized lump in my left breast. She thinks it’s most likely scar tissue from my breast reduction nine years ago (it’s in the right place for it), but she’s sending me for an ultrasound and mammogram, scheduled for tomorrow morning, just to make sure. (I had a mammogram in March which was fine.)

The logical side of my brain, which rarely shows itself, except in cases such as this, says, “Listen, your doctor has had her hands on thousands, millions maybe, of boobs. If she says she thinks it’s most likely scar tissue, and tells you that she’s not concerned about it, but wants to be safe, then it’s probably scar tissue.” My other side of my brain, the one that thinks its perfectly okay to eat all of the chocolate chip mini-cheesecakes in the fridge, says, “Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. Ohfuckohfuckohfuck.”

I’m not going to tell anyone IRL, since…well, that might put a damper on our relaxed holiday celebrations, but you guys…well, you’re dopers and you’ll understand if I just want to keep mum for now, except this one little post two days before Christmas. Still, I’ve witnessed the power of Good Doper Vibes and could use a few shot my way.

Good vibes coming your way!

How’s Santa going to wrap all that??? :::wonders if I can get my sister-in-law to break into the ultrasound place for you and wrap a big red ribbon around the machinery:::

Yeah, it’s 99.96% percent sure to be just scar tissue, and the giddy feeling you’ll get after you get the “all clear, you paranoid moron” results is a really good one (that’s the real gift), but honestly I don’t see any reason whatsoever why you shouldn’t eat that cheesecake.

Well, as long as you don’t smear any of it on your boobs before the test, that is. If talcum powder can skew the results, Og only knows what graham cracker crust might do! :wink:

I’ve had a couple of abnormal Paps. Just like you, I was all WTF?? Both times we just did a retest (more accurate test) and all was well, just some goofy but harmless cells, just like my NP said. They know whereof they speak.

Just breathe, breathe, breathe . . . relax and have a nice Christmas. And if some of those mini cheesecakes mysteriously disappear, we don’t know nuthin’. :slight_smile:

Good vibes sent . . .

Hang in there, sweetie. If it is something “bad” they’ll find it soon enough to deal with. And good on you for squishing the ladies!

Think happy thoughts and have a wonderful holiday. And if that’s the excuse you need to eat the mini chocolate cheesecakes, then have at it.

I’m too young for regular mammograms but I did have to get an ultrasound once for the same reason, scar tissue from my reduction (Best. Surgery. Ever.). It turned out to be nothing at all. :slight_smile:

Here’s some good vibes!

Good vibes all wrapped up with a big red bow on top. And when it all comes out all right, you can take the bow and put it on your

head, if you want to. Just to celebrate, you know. :stuck_out_tongue:

Hoping for the best.

Thanks, peoples. It means a lot.

We got freezing rain overnight, and the streets are a mess this morning. (There’s even been a horrible accident on the PA Turnpike–not that I’m taking that, but just the same.) I hope the weather and roads are not a Sign Of Things To Come today.

Whoo-hooo! Doper vibes worked! Ultrasound and mammogram completely negative!

Merry Christmas!


Woohooo! Have a wonderful holiday, and eat those cheesecakes!