If you take the telephone number for Art Bell East of the Rockies, multiply it by pi, take the square root and convert the digits into ASCII, it spells out “HELLMAN’S”. If you do the same thing with the telephone number West of the Rockies it spells out “BEST FOODS”.
Just a coincidence? Yeah, and Bill Gates is really in charge at Microsoft!!
If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
Uh, okay.
[whispering aside to others:]
back away slowly. make no sudden movements. when you’re out of sight, run your asses off. Alert the proper authorities. I’ll try to restrain him. don’t think about, me, go, GO!
[/whispering aside to others]
how did it start? well i don’t know i just feel the craving. i see the flesh and it smells fresh and it’s just there for the taking…
VvvV
I am absolutely certain that the Illuminati must have something to do with this CONSPIRACY!
The Illuminati? Those pathethic mere humans? When the Great Lord Cthulhu has got you between two slices of rye bread and is reaching for his jar of mayo, then you’ll know the truth!
You have WAY too much time on your hands.
– Sylence
P.S. Try Microsoft’s technical support number.
If a bird doesn’t sing, I’ll wait until it sings.
< fnord >
I’m almost afraid to ask what ye might be able to do with ‘Miracle Whip.’
Carry on.
Dr. Watson
“All the world is queer but me and thee, dear; and sometimes I think thee is a little queer.” – old Quaker saying
Hey, I have Microsoft’s corporate number if you need it, just spoke to them today. Nice people I tell you.
Gosh, don’t ever try to get a hold of the legal department, you end up in sales, go figure.
Damn, thank heavens you spotted this before the One Worlders and Trilateral Commission triumphed in their evil quest! (Don’t worry about the Illuminati; their decoder rings got lost in priority mail.)
: :peers around in paranod fashion::
But Paul is…dead!
Veb
Speaking of mayonaise…
The Titanic was actually doing double duty. First class cruise ship up top, cargo ship under the water line. Seems that the folks in Mexico had developed quite a taste for mayonaise, and the entire hold of the Titanic was filled with cases of the stuff for Mexican consumption. Tragically, the cargo never made it. That’s why, to this day, people in Mexico stop everything once a year and observe “Sinko de Mayo”.
::I’ll be leaving, now::
The overwhelming majority of people have more than the average (mean) number of legs. – E. Grebenik