My wife for years thought that the song “Don’t fear the reaper” was “do you feel the reefer.”
And I knew a lieutenant in the Army that thought the “Jeremy spoke in class today” was saying “Jeremy smoked grass today.”
Duran Duran’s “New Moon on Monday” (wait, it is Duran Duran, right?). I thought it was, “New Lunar Monday”.
This is really true! I thought the Beatles tune “Paperback Writer” was “Take the Back Right Turn” for years!
When I was a kid my uncle gave me a baby duck. I wanted to name it Rosie, because of that Neil Diamond song “Quacking Rosie.”
you picked a fine time to leave me lucille
with four hundred chidren and a crop in the field
“Groovin’ (on a Sunday Afternoon)” always had me confused.
One of the lines goes:
Life would be ecstasy,
You and me endlessly
I always thought they sang:
You and me and Leslie
For the longest time, I couldn’t figure out who Leslie was. I was a kid when I first heard the song, figured it was the daughter of either the singer or the object of his affection. When I got older, I thought it might be hinting at a threesome.
I’ve always found KMFDM to be a good source of misheard lyrics, personally. In their song, “Flesh”, the actual line is:
There’s a rusty halo on my head.
Whereas I had heard it (until just about a week ago, when it “clicked”) as:
There’s a must and hate all on my head.
I had a friend that for years, insisted the Carly Simon song You’re So Vain contained the line:
when it actually is:
Had to buy the sheet music to convince her…this was in the days before the Internet - and (gasp) home computers!
a real off the wall one here
does anyone remember a novelty song from the 70’s , The Streak, by Ray Stevens?
its a song about streaking, running in the nude, in public
toward the end of the song Stevens ad libs: Ethel, you shamless hussy!
i thought he said: Ethel, you shave that pussy.
it did fit with the subject matter of the song .
Yep, it most definitely is. Check out these links for more. 
One of my favorite ones is taken from a hymn:
Real: “Galdly the cross I’d bear…”
Misheard: “Gladly, the cross-eyed bear…”
F_X
Not mine, but a Japanese friend once told me he originally thought the limbo song (and associated dance) were “bimbo” (Japanese for “poor”, and that the people doing it were trying to get money.
Thanks for the great laugh!!
I love the song “Secret asian man” by davinci’s notebook 
Madonna: “Last night I dreamt of some bagels.”
I musta been hungry when I went to bed.
There was a song by Boston where they have a line like “I don’t care if I get behind” (?), but what I heard was “I don’t care about FBI.”
When Chicago released “Hard to say I’m sorry,” they sang, “After all that we’ve been through.” My brother thought it was “After all the hooey we’ve been through.”
Courtesy of my sister:
“Say you, say me/Favor old ladies/That’s the way it should be”
(Rather than “Say it for always” there in the middle.)
I believe “Pour Some Sugar on Me” is quite possibly one of the most mis-heard songs in the universe. I’ve actually rewritten almost the entire song using various genuine mondegreens I’ve collected: http://fergo.eshire.net/sugar.htm
I need to update it to include Jack Batty’s lyric and also the one from the cell phone commercial where the guy thinks it’s “Pour some shook-up Ramen!”
I used wonder what Kenny and Dolly meant when they sung…
Ireland’s industry, that is what we are
I though that Dollywood was relocating to County Leitrim;).
An Irish breakfast radio show used to have one of these every morning - one of the best was Atlantic Star’s…
Here we are
The two of us together,
Taking this crazy chance,
To pee on the lawn
Remember the ABC song?
I thought the line was
"When Smokey sings I hear volence"
Of course I know now that when smoke sang, Martin Fry heard **VIOLINS **
There was a song by the group called “The Band”. I don’t remember the song name, but I used to hear it all the time when I was little and sitting in the car with my parents.
The actual line was: “I know she’s attractive…”
In my version, I used to belt out: “I know she’s a tractor…”
My parents still haven’t let me forget it.
The other one that always gets me …
“Rocket Man” by Elton John.
In fact at this very moment, I can’t think of the actual lyrics. Every once in a while I’ll look it up and say to myself, “Oooh, I see. That makes sense.” But in my head right now:
“Rocket man … early morning fools don’t help me none.”
And now I’ll just go look it up … and I see that it’s actually:
“Rocket Man … burning out his fuse up here alone.”
Oooh, I see. That makes sense.