Seen any good bumper stickers lately?

Back in the 80’s I remember laffin’ my a$$ of at some, but then again I was but a tot.
I saw “Hang up and Drive” the other day, which I thought was good, and also “I was at Dave and Kathy’s Wedding” which must’ve been one helluva event if people want to advertise that.
Maybe I spend far too much time on the road and am looking for a diversion.

“I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather - not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car”

I just got one that says McShit with the golden arches and everything. I love the ‘hang up and drive’ stickers too!

I am so immature, I love the takeoffs on Farfagnugan…
Fukingroovin’ (with a stick person dancing)
Fuckinpukin’ (with a stick person puking)
I saw that last one yesterday and almost peed my pants laughing…

My two favs that I used to have:
Dont’ like my driving? Dial 1-800-EAT-SHIT
also…(and this one got me lots of dates…no kidding)

Lonely bitch seeks kind, considerate guy for love/hate relationship
loved that one…

If at first you don’t succeed, redefine success.

I also remember the “I was at …and …Wedding”

My current favorite now is
“What if the Hokey Pokey is what its all about”


The worst thing that can possibly happen is not be used for something by someone - Kurt Vonnegut

How about, “Eat your honey…millions of bees can’t be wrong.”?


MaryAnn
Sometimes life is so great you just gotta muss up your hair and quack like a duck!

The one I have on my car right now says “Do not wash: This vehicle is undergoing a scientific dirt test.”
–Sylence


“A friend of mine once sent me a post card with a picture of the entire planet Earth taken from space. On the back it said, ‘Wish you were here’.” - Steven Wright

First lemme say that Bumper Sticker are the stupidest things on Gods Green Earth. Do you really need to advertise your fucking politics or religious beliefs on your bumper? Do you really think I’m gonna read that Jesus Saves bumper sticker and suddenly veer off to the next church and get saved? Keep it to yourself, where it belongs.

But, a good joke is a good joke.

One I’ve seen on bumper stickers, T-shirts, and on bulletin boards is this:
Wanted:
“Seeking wife, must be able to cook, clean fish. Must have boat with motor. Send photo of boat and motor.”

I think thats funny, but I’m easily entertained.

Any of those “My other car is a…(insert expensive/tacky/non-car vehicle here)” bumper sticker are really lame.

I like the “If you can read this your to close, asshole!” bumper stickers, but they fit with any of the get even with the idiots stickers.

We did some of these, search “bumper sticker” for the old thread. I tried to remember some, but as I usually drive, I could not write them down or forgot. It turns out they aren’t always easy to write in 6-7 words!

Some of my favorites:

“Jesus is coming; look busy!”

“The sun will extinguish in 3 1/2 billion years, which means they’ll have to finish I-75 in the dark.”

And, though they’re not really bumper stickers, I love the Darwin fish.


“Knowing others is wisdom. Knowing yourself is enlightenment.” - Lao-tzu, Chinese philosopher

“Horn broke, watch for finger!”

“Keep honking, I’m reloading!”

“I’m not tailgating, I’m drafting”

The one I CANNOT stand to see is the one you see on senior citizens cars that says “I’m spending my kids inheritance”. Why call it their inheritance if its your money in the first place. Don’t know why that bugs me so much.

one more…“That’s Ms. Bitch to you”

phouka, that one about the sun and I-75 made me laugh. That must be the portion that goes through Tennessee, cause I’ve never seen any state have slower road construction than TN and I live in the Road Construction Capital (Michigan)!


…it has never been my way to bother much about things which you can’t cure.

  • A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court-Mark Twain

phouka: And, though they’re not really bumper stickers, I love the Darwin fish.

The other morning I what looked like a fish at first, but was really a shark. Loved it!

“Its not a bald spot, its a solar panel for a sex machine” (Yeah, its tacky- but I laughed)

“Why vote for the lesser of two evils? Elect Chthulu”

“Quayle in 2000”

This is a little off-subject, but does anyone want to go halvsies with me on a 5,000 copy bumper-sticker printing of

HONK IF YOU THINK I’M AN ASSHOLE FOR DRIVING THIS THING

I want to go out at midnight and plaster them on the bumpers of every sport utility vehicle in New York City. Why do people think it’s necessary to drive one of those $#@%#@ things in the city?


Uke

This was on a really dirty old pickup truck:

“Don’t laugh at my truck; your daughter may be in here.”


I don’t know who first said “everyone’s a critic,” but I think it’s a really stupid saying.

“I’m trying to see things from your point of view, but I can’t get my head that far up my ass.”

The Christian fish symbol sporting little legs and “Darwin” inscribed inside.

“I CLOSED WOLSKI’S…Milwaukee, Wi”


Tim
“My hovercraft is full of eels.”

Omniscient needs a sticker that says “I hate bumper stickers” wouldn’t that be a hoot?

My favorite remains, “Join the army. Travel to far away, exotic places, meet strange and interesting people, and kill them.”

My absolute favorite. Can you tell that I am a pacifist?

S.C.

We have one that’s a chalkboard so that we can change our mind… it makes for some fun discussions!

OK… This will probably piss a few people off, but what they hey.

My favorite all time bumper sticker stated:

Jesus Loves You, but everyone else thinks you’re an asshole.
My car has 3 bumper stickers on it:

  1. Abolish Mornings
  2. Vote: Republican, it’s easier than thinking
    Vote: Democrat, it’s easier than working
    Vote: Libertarian, it’s cheaper than taxes
  3. Red Meat isn’t bad for you,
    Green, Fuzzy meat is bad for you.
    I am a strong believer in offending sensitive people.

Jason R Remy

“And it could be safely said that at that moment, in the whole of India, no one, absolutely no one, was f^(king a goat.”
– John Irving A Son of the Circus (1994)