Severe Rectal Bleeding?!?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
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I bartend. I start my workday at 7 p.m., when most peoples’ are over.

Tonight at work my mother was texting me about this afghan she made that she would like to give to my best friend…we talked about colors and patterns…

And at 11:30 p.m. she texted me that my father has been admitted to the hospital…and that she had driven him to the ER several hours earlier, with severe rectal bleeding…so severe, apparently, that he passed out in the car while she was driving…

So he was admitted, and they’re going to do a GI inspection tomorrow…I’m assuming that means they’re going to inspect his gastro-intestinal tract? Stick a camera/probe/whatever up his butt? People tell me they can’t do this until “everything has passed?” So after he empties out his colon??

My mom says she didn’t tell me about it, during all our afghan conversations, because she didn’t know what was wrong yet…

I’m behind the bar and I get this text message and at first I’m just casual, like, “So my mom says my dad is in the ER…” I’m proud of myself and a bit alarmed at how well I’m taking it. Like I guess I’m a pretty low-key chick. I can handle this. I’ve got it.

And then ten minutes later–with no warning, no internal freak-out, no indication that this is going to happen–I’m crying. It just starts happening. I can’t help it. I can’t control it. I wasn’t even trying to prevent it–that’s how cool I thought I was.

All of a sudden I’m making a Crown and Coke–Crown is on special–and my vision is blurry and my nose is running and I find myself choking.

And people want their drinks, and they don’t know why I’m crying, and I don’t want to tell them, because it isn’t their problem or their business, but they can’t help asking, because I’m making their drinks and trying not to cry into into their beverages…

I text my mother to tell my dad that he better knock it off, and that I love him, and that I’m freaking out.

She says she’ll tell him, but that I shouldn’t freak out, because nothing happens outside of God’s plan, and that my dad is “cool.”

Which means he’s OK with it, I presume. And so is God.

I’m not.

One of my regulars tells me that hemorrhoids can bleed a lot…so I text my mother that…she reminds me that she’s had severe hemorroids (the kind that require surgery) and that the amount of blood lost by my dad makes that idea unlikely…

So here’s Audrey unable to go to sleep, panicking about what can cause that kind of rectal bleeding. My dad is only 56. Goes to the gym, weighs about 215 at a height of 6’3"…watches his cholesterol, conforms to a low-carb diet…

People at the bar were whispering, “What’s wrong with Audrey?”

And then the whispered reply… “Her pop is in the hospital…”

And then there’s the look. The worried, sympathetic-yet-annoyed look. Like, “I really want a drink, but I feel bad asking her. If her dad is in the hospital that sucks…but I still need a drink…so sorry Audrey! I hope he’s okay! Can I have another Crown and Coke?”

This OP is kinda long and pointless. I’m writing it because I don’t know what else to do. I don’t know what causes severe rectal bleeding. I don’t know what my mother will do without my father. I don’t know that I need to know, because perhaps it’s minor and fixable. But what if it isn’t? It’s great that God is OK with what’s going on, re: my mother, but that doesn’t mean that I am.

I’ve been spontaneously crying all night. Like I don’t even know it’s going to happen, I’m not even thinking about anything–because if I were THINKING, I would know that I have no business crying until I know more of what’s going on–but here I am anyway. Blinking away tears out of nowhere. Freaking the hell out.

Thanks for reading, if you got this far.

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You and your family are in my thoughts.

Yeah, I imagine they do have to wait for him to pass all fecal material before they can do any imaging of his colon.

I hope it’s something benign like an internal hemorrhoid gone supernova.

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What could be scarier! And waiting for news sucks

My Dad went through something like that, the diagnosis was diverticulitis and time for a high fiber diet.

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{{{{{{{Audrey & family}}}}}}}

We’ve been through this at least three times with my 92-year-old MIL. They never did really find a definitive cause. Not to be flippant, but it’s kind of like trying to find the leak in the roof when it’s not raining.

Your dad is young and healthy, and that is very much in his favor, regardless of what the cause of the bleeding is – and I join l**isacurl **in hoping it’s something minor. Hang in there.

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So sorry and I hope your dad is on the mend. Stuff like that is scary and I am sure that trying to maintain your Work Face while dealing with that news was simply too much to ask - and that’s more than okay. Please take care.

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I’m sending good thoughts!

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Oh, sweetie {{{{Audrey}}}}

First thing: breathe. Seriously. Right now while you’re reading this, just a few deep breaths.

I’ll wait.

No, really, I will. Breathe while you’re scrolling.

…

…

Now, there are lots of things that can cause rectal bleeding, from the very silly (pushed too hard pooping and tore the skin around the anus coincidentally right at a vein) to the very serious (cancer or a ruptured intestine). Being on a low-carb diet suggests his fiber might be low as well, and that can make things a little wonky. Of course, none of you will know what it is until the hospital can do some tests. The good news is he’s at the best place he can be, where they can give him blood if he needs it. A lower GI series will probably be ordered, and your customer is right, they’ll have to get all the stool out of his large intestine first. Usually they do that with a gentle saline enema or 12. Then they put some liquid barium up there, also by an enema, and look at it under a machine. The barium makes the intestine show up white, and they can see if there are any tears or pockets of obvious infection or anything. There may be other tests as well, scopes and whatnot. Once they find out where the bleeding is coming from, they’ll have a much better idea of what to do about it.

Are you close enough to go to the hospital to sit with your mom while she worries? If so, take the time to shower and take care of yourself first - she doesn’t need another person to worry about right now.

If not, feel free to post here as much as you want, and just get that anxiety out. Dopers are great listeners.

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Good vibes to you and your pop (and your mum).

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{{{Audrey}}}

I’m an EMT, and hauled in a few oldsters with rectal bleeds. As previously mentioned, there can be all kinds of causes, but a significant number are related to a lack of dietary fiber coupled with overexertion while dropping the kids off at the pool. Hemorrhoids add to the mix.

Your mom did fine getting him there because it was appropriate. A strong bleed like that is nothing to take lightly.

BTW, do you know how awkward it is to ask to look inside the knickers of an 80 yo guy who’s bleeding out his ass?

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{{{Audrey Levins and family}}}
You freaked out because you do care. Although we all know that we are fragile creature, we still have that small belief that things won’t happen to us right now.

My father (50 at the time) passed out at home. My mom freaked, and i had to call (i was 11 at the time) the ambulance (mom barely spoke English). We though it was his heart, as he had some problems with it before. It turned out to be a bleeding ulcer in his stomach, not alarming but still in need of several hospital days.
I was trembling a little during it, and i felt also that i’m ‘cool’ and can handle it. It’s not till i got home that night the tears started running.

How many times did our parents (or whomever that truly cared for you) shown a strong face when it was you in ‘danger’ and they had a good cry or what-have-you behind closed doors?
You are strong. Be there for them, show how you care.
I’ll be sending good mojo your way!

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Wait…

Crown is on special?

Hey, you needed to smile.
Got my fingers crossed for your Dad.

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{{{Audrey}}}

I’m sure he will be fine!

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I don’t know why, but your story reminded me of when I found out my dad’s kidneys shut down. He has scleroderma, which means hardening of the skin. It also affects the organs (hence the kidneys).

I found out on November 10, 2003. His favorite team is the Eagles, and I was watching them play on Monday Night Football. The Eagles went on to win that game 17-14. He did really poorly for about a year; he was on dialysis and looking for a donor. It turned out my mom was actually a perfect match, so he underwent surgery about a year later. The Eagles did really well in the 2004 season. So well, in fact, that they made it to super bowl XXXIX.

Fortunately, my dad started getting healthy again, and was in prime form to watch the Eagles play in their first Super Bowl since I was born. Unfortunately for the Eagles, since my dad was healthy, Og didn’t need to help them out anymore to give my dad strength. They ended up losing to the Patriots 21-24.

My dad still secretly wishes he had delayed the transplant so his Eagles could have won the Super Bowl that year.

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Thanks for all the thoughtfulness and all the replies!!

He has a colonoscopy scheduled in the morning at 8:00–they let him go home from the hospital this morning. They did all kinds of X-rays and blood tests and found no reason/explanation for the bleeding…which is kinda nice cuz it rules out tumors…so they won’t know the precise reason til morning.

So I’m feeling better about it today…still freaked of course but not panic-attacking.

Posting it here made me feel a lot better. Thanks guys.