The sexual side of a long distance relationship… How do you handle it?
Reeder and I have been friends for a long time, and we are lovers. Unfortunately, 400 some odd miles seperate us. We’ve managed to get together a few times for a weekend, but it’s not enough. We are planning to be together, but it probably won’t be until spring.
Since we talk together on the phone quite a bit, phone sex has become almost natural to us.
But we were both womdering how other people handled that part of a long distance relationship.
Should I tip-toe back out and leave you two alone?
Last month I started my very firstest relationship ever. (More than one first was involved, but you don’t want to hear about that. :D) My girlfriend lives in a town near my hometown, which is hundreds of miles away from where I am now. (I’m away at college.) I’ve been able to visit her a couple of times, but since neither of us has a car it’s difficult.
We haven’t tried phone sex, and I’m too embarassed to bring the subject up. Basically, we email each other a bunch with the standard “hugs and kisses” stuff, but nothing x-rated so far.
So I guess the way we handle the sex part is to do our best to ignore it until we do get to see each other. Then we just go at it like bunnies.
I’m going to do my best NOT to make this a TMI type post.
I get to speak as the voice of experience here.
You either ignore it and go like bunnies, as the previous poster suggested, or you learn the fine art of masturbation. There is nothing wrong with helping yourself take an edge off things.
I hope it works out as well for you as it has so far for me (still with my long distance love, but now we’re not long distance anymore, just on opposite work shifts ~ which does suck sometimes).
SmeelMeel…
Debi and I have been lovers and friends for 5 years. We have touched and carressed each other. Made wonderful love many times. Circunstances have kept us apart.
The question was for those in our situation. Trust me, we aren’t horndogs. I’m 49 Debi is 43.
What do you mean the question was for people in “your and Debi’s situation”? Do you mean long distance relationships?
Mine WAS a long distance relationship at the start. I was fortunate that it didn’t have to be that way for an overly long time (but let me tell you it was long enough!).
Or are you referring to something else that makes a distinction between your situation and mine?
I was simply giving another suggestion to the OP of how to handle it. [sub]No pun intended.[/sub]
Back during my single days (got married at 37), most of my relationships were long-distance. I was (and still am) a pretty horny critter, and I’d be delighted to advise, if I understood the question.
Because ‘masturbate when you’re apart, go at it like rabbits when you’re together’, with or without phone sex, depending on how that works for you, pretty much covers it, to the extent that I understand what you’re asking.
I’m currently 200 miles from my b/f and we had managed to sort out the logistics of seeing each other once every two or three weeks at least. Unfortunately he’s now returned to student status and as such has no money, which means no train tickets to see him.
Two words: phone sex. A few more: practise it and you get better at it, you get better and it gets more fun. After all, when you’re stuck at opposite ends of a phone line, what else can you do?
Hugs and kisses on the end of an e-mail. What a substitute hey.
Keep up with the long distance thing though - if they’re worth it, then so is the distance. Wow how cheesy do I manage to sound!
Phone sex is a wonderful way to feel close and take the “edge” off when you are apart… but for me once I had the real thing phone sex was great but the ache was always there for… well ya know ** The Evil Penis ** of course
The SO: Gunslinger.
The distance: 438 miles.
The plan: Visits once a month (frequency might pick up to every two or three weeks once I get my car at Christmastime, and can make a seven-hour drive instead of taking a 14-hour bus ride - it’ll cost less, two), with mad sex. In between, lots of masturbation. We each have nekkid pictures of each other (although he can’t get any new ones, I don’t have a camera here on campus - I used to use my mom’s on the home computer) and, when inspired, we have been known to write pornographic stories… both those latter activities have ceased since we started our visits just two months ago, but before then, they helped.
When my wife and I were dating, I lived in Vancouver and she in Calgary. Every 3-4 weeks we’d fly to visit each other and “made up” for lost time. I think it was easier for us as we never lived in the same city, so we didn’t know any different. IE - The longest we’d ever been together any single time was about a week. We dated that way for 3 years.
There is no way we could do that again after being married and living under the same roof for 1-1/2 years though.
