seeking wisdom, platitudes, or peace

My ability to use words gracefully fails when I try to talk about my problems. Probably an effect of not trusting people enough to talk about them often and thus lacking practice. I may be new here, but what I’ve seen lets me believe that you are trustworthy, fair, and caring people, so here goes nothing…

I have been with my girlfriend for 2 and a half years now. Thing is, although it started as a fairly normal relationship, we’ve been at extremely long distances from each other since I left for school (she’s a year younger and has a different home state - life of military brat is not cool). Anyway, she’s at school in CO now (that is, for those of you who don’t know where I am, about 1400 miles from Pittsburgh. Maybe closer than Belgium - Lord that was a long way! - but still not easy to reach) and as time passes I am beginning to think (or maybe just notice?) that she and I are growing in different directions.

So what do you do? I can’t afford to call her any more than I do - hell, I can’t afford to call even this much - and chatting online isn’t an option as she has a lack of access. Is there any way to do something about what’s happening or do I have to sit and watch us drift apart helplessly?

I don’t know what to tell you. My experience with a long distance relationship ended poorly.

But-you may be able to call more often-there are some internet to phone sites that would allow you to call her or free, I think. For some reason I’m thinking of but that may not be right. I’m sure someone on here probably knows one or more.

Write as many letters to her as you can without your hand cramping up from fatigue. As much as I enjoy a good phone call or chatting online, there’s nothing quite like receiving a handwritten letter. I love the fact that when I’m missing someone, I can read over something they’ve written to me and feel as if they’re right beside me. Remember what John Donne said: “Sir, more than kisses, letters mingle souls. For, thus friends absent speak.” Plus, at 33 cents an envelope, they’re much cheaper than phoning her daily.

I appreciate, and will follow, the advice. Knew I could count on people here



Nothing like taking advantage of an asset quickly.

Good going.

And you know you have my hugs on this one, Le Sang.

I have to agree with the others. Send her letters, either by postal mail or e-mail.

Not the most ideal situation, to be sure, but what else can you do? Those of us with long distance friendships can certainly relate!

Write her–trust your ability to put into words the feelings you have (I think you did fine in the OP). And realize that what is now, won’t be forever. You WILL get to see her.

“Good phrases are surely,
and ever were, very commendable.”
–King Henry IV, Part 2, Act 3, Scene ii