just go ahead and order that hooked on phonics course, by golly, and damn the man who stood in their way!
So, they sauntered across the way to the handy-dandy bookstore, where Keanu Reeves was signing his bands’ latest album…
…and the thirteen women, with the six-foot-tall Sally as spokeperson, formed a circle around him.
Sally asked, “Well, how shall we do this? It’s been six hours since we all left the Teamsters building. Are we all chipper and ready?”
Twelve female voices answered in unison, “We are!”
Keanu turned white as a sheet. The thirteen horny, naked women tiptoed slowly toward him. He was stuck and he knew it. Thirteen women. Good God.
They agreed that the order in which they would hump him would be…
well, they were going to establish a peckering order, but then, with so many of them to keep track of, someone, bless her parts, said, ‘nah, that’s too hard!’
And so it was, despite his terror.
Sally got to him first by a nipple and immediately started to enthusiastically
…straddle him, stick his “hard” member in her vagina, and bump him in his face with her huge boobs. Sally, quite keen of eye, noticed his pupils getting as big as possible–and, with a careful feel of his wrist, could feel his pulse, which she pegged at around 110.
What Sally didn’t know whas that in fact Keanu himself had not “done it” for about two weeks. He reached orgasm and…
due to an unfortunate ignorance of the hazards of two-week back pressure and breathing techniques, blew one of his eyes out.
As he lay on the floor moaning, the hard member slid back out, and one of the softer members, the bassist, took his place.
Several of the other naked ladies went to scout the self-help section of the store to find something for Keanu, while several others were snagging the odd, random fella from the mall-side entrance to the store, and stealing their sodas, because the 12 hours in the pleasure palace had left them so dehydrated they were creaking.
As they slowly re-hydrated, the lusty gleams returned to their eyes, and appetites were revived.
Meanwhile, the softer member
Meanwhile, the softer member…
Waited until paramedics treated Keanu, and retrieved his popped-out eye, then prepared to help himself to the apparently insatiable Sally.
Then he pondered. His name was Phil Ramirez, and he was one of the few left-handed bassists around. Why, he’d been in a small combo called The Cigar Band, so called because everyone, including the slinky lead guitarist Jeanette Strong–a sexual champion in her own right–smoked cigars. (She preferred cheroots and panatelas.) He had bedded Jeanette once–she preferred the other two men in the band–straining his own marriage almost to the breaking point.
So Phil withdrew, in more ways than one, despite Sally’s protests.
Other performers nearby, such as Garth Brooks, Ricky Martin, and Ringo Starr, when apprised of Sally’s sexual appetite and dimensions…
one day picked up this one book called ‘The Joy of Sex’, and that’s when I first started masturbating. It wasn’t very long until I was really going at it, with lube, without, on the toilet, under my desk, swapping hands midstream, just to see if I could do it, experimenting with different vegetables up my a
**
What?
[sub]oh sweet god in heaven
vuncular speech for such a mega-star, don’t you think Sally?", inquired Phoebe?
Sally replied ‘’‘OH OOOHOHHHHH ohHHHH’’’’! So Phoebe snatched a hapless customer who had been approaching the sales counter with a Popular Science magazine. She threw him down on the floor, ripped his Cabella’s khakis down to his knees, and with wide eyes cooed
“Ooooooh, that’ll do pig, that’ll do.”
The remainder of the group, not otherwise occupied with the band,
The remainder of the group, not otherwise occupied with the band,
…tried another tack. They dressed in modest but attractive clothing, had their hair styled in low-key styles, and started frequenting the local courthouse–looking for husbands who had split with their wives, or male co-respondents. The men in the Cigar Band and Reeves’ combo weren’t enough; the drummer in the Cigar Band, a balding, portly chap named Jeremy Britton, and the willowy Johnny Goss, the combo’s manager and male singer, had been quite sated by Jeanette and were not responding. So the women–including Lt. Uhuru, the brunette Vera Tedson, and the precocious supersexy Betty Idelson started being seen in divorce courtrooms, resulting in…
vitro.
So I said, ‘you want in vitro, babe? C’mere, I gotcha invitro for ya, right here.’
Well, that didn’t go over very well, as you might have imagined, so I was gonna have to try plan B.
There was this little babe workin the late shift at the gas station across the street from me, tight, y’know what I mean?
So, my plan was to wait till like five minutes before her shift and then go in the store, and
…look around.
“Man!” He said.
The clerk thrust herself forward at him and growled, "Who are you calling ‘man’?
He felt a sudden bulge in his slacks and the zipper placket ripping asunder. But he composed himself enough to reply.
“No! I mean we are ‘in vitro’–we’re completely surrounded by glass!” He was right. The convenience store had no real walls–just glass all the way around and slender chrome support pillars.
Now Sally, Betty, Beverly, Phoebe, and the other horny women had approached, still lustful and naked, and watched the man and the busty clerk through the glass, with obvious fascination.
“They want a show,” she said, her voice rising in anticipation and delight. “And we’re gonna give them one!”
By the time she stepped out from behind the counter she had stripped herself buck naked. The man was too surprised to react as she approached and pulled his pants down.
The horny women looking through the glass chortled as the couple inside the store…