The laugh’s on me here. I went to a local Arby’s that I’d never been to before. After placing my drive-through order at the window, I attempted to pull up to the next window to collect my food. Turns out, unlike most fast food places around here, this Arby’s uses a one-window system. No one else was there, so I just did a lap around the building and came back …
I thought of another incident, to which I was an unwilling accomplice.
During my McEmployment years, I dated a guy who was smart, fun, sincere, and a bit unique. He was also a McEmployee, although at a different location than mine. One evening, on our way home from somewhere, he decided to detour through MY McDriveThru. (Obviously I wasn’t working that shift, but at the time I knew everyone who was.)
“WelcometoMcDonaldshowcanIhelpyou?” said my coworker.
“I’m feeling a little lonely tonight,” confessed my SO.
“WHAT are you doing?!?” I hissed.
There was a long silence. Coworker started over. “Welcome to McDonalds. May I take your ORDER?”
“Do you have time to talk?” my SO asked.
I alternated miming “Please don’t do this,” and “I’m going to kill you,” to no avail.
“Do you want any food?” asked the now-irked McEmployee.
“No,” said SO, “I was just hoping for some conversation. Do you want to chat?”
“No!”
“Oh,” said SO sadly, but resignedly, “Good night then.”
I ducked under the dashboard until we had exited the parking lot, I was so embarrassed.
Once, when I was in the drive thru at KCF/Taco Bell and employee handed my my food and said, ‘Do you know Jesus?’. I replied, ‘Is the food that bad?’.
And why the hell do fast food places put the menu and the speaker at the same place. You sit in line trying to figure out what to have and then the first glance you get at the menu the voice is already asking for your order, and of course there’s a line up behind you.
They really need to have big juicy reminders and specials and stuff on the drive up to the speaker!
I don’t mind if I’m having a Quarter Pounder or something, but try pulling up to an unfamiliar restaurant and figuring out what to have (especially with 3 other people in the car) in 10 seconds.
I spent many a high school weekend taking orders at the drivethough window of Taco Bell. I learned so much those summers–like, if you can fake being polite at the window, you’re trapped there until you quit. One summer, I had major jaw surgery, and my teeth were wired together for months. You’d think my purple, basketball-shaped head and poor ventriloquism skills would’ve put me somewhere in the back of the store. Gah! That was pretty humiliating.
Unfortunately, our restaurant was the only in town open after midnight. That’s when you get the drunks after the bars close. I had some drunk guy hitting on me (this was post- post-jaw surgery) so I asked a male co-worker to finish up his order. When I didn’t come back to the window, the drunk threw his cinnamon twists and tacos back in. I still snicker when I think of James being sprinkled with falling lettuce and cheese while being told he’s “not the hot 16-year-old! You’re just an ugly boy! I hate you!”
I worked at Tim Horton’s for a bit so I got to experience the joys of that drive thru. Not really any amusing stories though.
I got to know some regulars through that route. They could pull up, say the usual and I’d know what they were having without seeing who it was until they pulled up (3 honey glazed, a medium hot chocolate and a medium double double… this was 5 years ago now btw). I knew my Dad before he spoke because all you could hear was the roar of the truck which was then shut off so he could order (those of you with loud vehicles who do this… we bless you, it saves our ears and makes it easier to get your order right).
One time I had a guy go through, he only ordered a couple coffees and some muffins I think and he gave me a fifty. I gave him his food and went to give him his change… and he drove off! Never came back for it either.
I had a couple teens once, who must’ve gone through the McDonald’s up the road before coming to us because the driver wanted an ice capp. Things were fine, until I opened the window to hand the guy his drink and a chicken mcnugget comes flying through the window at me! His passenger had thrown it and I gave them such a look… the driver looked sheepish and apologetic and drove off quickly. I can imagine he was giving his buddy shit for that one.
Another one that sticks in my mind was after the bar rush had slowed down (I worked graveyard shift, so drunks were always coming after the bars closed) and we were out of darn near everything. It wasn’t usually that bad, but that night we had had quite a rush. We had two types of bagels left, only a few doughnuts and just a little chili and soup.
This couple come up to the drivethru and start placing their order, the lady insisting she HAD to have a chili and a coffee, and she wanted a bagel with her chili, a bun wasn’t good enough. So I told her we only had blueberry and cinnamon raisin left, but she started cussing and swearing and I could hear the guy (barely) trying to calm her down.
Finally I told them to come up to the window and looked out. The woman? She was extremely drunk and she was in the passenger seat (yet I had her better than the guy driving through the intercom!). Kept insisting I had to have bagels, that she didn’t want a sweet one with her chili, because ‘that doesn’t go together’.
After a couple minutes of telling her we didn’t have it I just looked at them and pointed in the direction of the next Tim Horton’s (not far up the road actually) and told them to go bother them, because I wasn’t going to serve them*. They finally left.
Being night shift we had that discretion. We didn’t have a manager on shift, and we were told we could do that.
You had to remind me, didn’t you?
There’s a particular McDonald’s in town that I try to avoid until I forget and then end up going there where I am faced with a poorly aging Elvria look-a-like who has a weird and extremely irritating manner of pronouncing things. It’s something like “Welcome to McDonald’s. Take your order pleeeeeeease.” And then, “Thank yoooooooou.” It. Drives. Me. Crazy. I guess you’d just have to be there to experience it, but it has the effect of fingernails on the chalkboard.
Ooh, ooh! I got one.
I was at a McDonald’s drive-thru in Kaimuki and I could barely hear the order speaker. After finally getting my order in, I told the worker I could barely hear them. She replied “Yeah, the order-takers are on the mainland”.
McDonald’s outsourcing its drive-thru. Should I start preparing for the apocolypse?
</top this mode>
Back when I was in High School drive-thrus were fairly new, I think only Jack in the box had them. (McDonalds did not)
Anyway a buddy of mine was working graveyard at JitB.
Drunk pulls up to the clown
Drunk: Large coffee please
Buddy: Anything else?
D: No
B: That will be $.75 (or whatever the cost was)
As he goes to turn off the box he hears the follwing:
Pling, pling, tinkle (<-sound of coins being thrown at the clown speaker)
B: If you don’t pick up those coins right now, I am going to get out of this box and beat you up
Drunk gets out of car and picks up coins.
I worked at our small town’s greasy spoon/drive in when I was 14. The hamburger cook’s ex-boyfriend came through drive-up one night and Cook selected some nice, dead flies from the window ledge and fried them up into the ex’s hamburger.
The summer after high school I was a slave at a cafeteria in the Grand Canyon Nat’l Park. One of my tasks was to clean out the huge iced tea machines at the end-of-shift (about 2am). I was tired and accidentally left two sponges in the giant bins; the next day the tourists unwittingly enjoyed sponge-flavored iced tea until one of the sponges floated to the bottom toward the end of the day and cut off the spigot’s flow. The cafeteria manager was livid!
Allow me to introduce you to the good Dr. McNinja. The author offered the original art for this panel signed if a drive thru employee would do this. The alt text now says you can look up McNinja gag on youtube. It’s unfortunately not so very funny.
Just last week went to the local Wendy’s - this place is known for having a very proficient drive through - the cars are usually 20 deep at lunch time, and aside from stopping at the order box and pick-up window, you can pretty much idle through and never hit the brakes - they are that quick.
Unfortunately, I pulled in behind an elderly driver. I could not get a good look other than the Q-tip puffing over the driver’s head rest. She should not have been driving - she ran over the curb (2x), spent at least 2 mins at the order box, another minute at the pay window rummaging for exact change, etc.
This is a two window place - she pulls up to the first, hands the clerk her money, takes her change, and promptly drives off past the pick-up window and back onto the road. The drive through clerk actually had to pull her food back back off the sill - she literally forgot to pick up her food.
I made a comment that I didn’t think this lady should even be behind the wheel of a car. The drive through clerk told me this happened to them at least once a day.
I was driving my '74 Volkswagen Beetle. Placed my order at the speaker. Drove up to the window. Employee Guy leans out the Drive-Thru window, punches me in the arm and says, “Punch bug!”
Got the “stuck in the Drive thru” for 45 minutes bit at an Arby’s about 15 years ago. Stupid concrete lane crap blocking me in, vehicles in front and back. Then they messed up my order and my asshole former friend who ordered $8 in food turned out not to have any cash on him. No, he didn’t say anything before ordering. Heck, he’d promised me gas money because I was doing him a favor (we were in my pickup truck). Not only did I not get the gas money, but it cost me food money too!
Wendy’s, circa 2001. Pulled up to the drive-thru behind someone at the speaker who was too busy with a personal call on their cell phone to actually order. After more than five minutes of sitting there listening to the bitch yell into her cell phone and ignore repeated requests for her order, I yelled out that if she did not hang up her cell phone, I was going to shove it up her ass. She ordered rather quickly and after getting her food, took off like a rocket. 
I had just moved to the Houston area. I stopped at a Micky D’s drive through on the north side one evening, and as I was waiting in line to place my order, I happened to notice movement among the shubbery bordering the driveway. I looked again, and the whole area turned out to be practically heaving with dozens of rodents of various sizes. At least three species of mice, rats and something in between were visible; for a moment I thought I was hallucinating but I overheard the people in the car behind me commenting on the sight as well. I’m not all that squeamish; I actually went ahead and made and got my order, but I will admit I’ve never gone back to that particular outlet.
There were rats at my McDonalds too. Once, when I was working the back drive-thru, some customers drove up. Wide-eyed, in low tones, they told me there was a rat at our back door. Without missing a beat, I replied, “Thanks, I’ll go let him in!” Fortunately, they laughed.
I have a co-worker who goes through the drive-thru at Wendy’s every work day for lunch. Five days a week, every week. He always orders the same meal: a baked potato, small chili and a small coke. It’s the same price every day, something like $3.23.
The drive-thru people refer to him as $3.23, and they go ahead and prepare his bag with the number of condiments and napkins he requires.
Once when his chili bowl was was under-filled he called the 1-800 number to complain about it. The next day when he went through the drive-thru he was a little surprised when they assured him that his chili bowl was full this time.
My brother’s best friend from high school hates tomatoes. He’s so used to the drive thru including tomatoes on his hamburgers that while still next to the window he will pull the burger from the bag, unwrap it, and check. Since the drive thru is done with his order, the drive thru window is closed. If his burger has tomatoes on it, he returns them by peeling off the slices and throwing them so they land flat against the drive thru window – shmuk! shmuk! – and then driving off. He’s done this so often he’s perfected the ideal throw to stick them to the window. I guess that’s one way to let them know they’ve screwed up your order.
LOL!