As told by the Simpsons:
I have several very good friends who are bartenders.
I’ve met lots of waiters who have been perfectly friendly. It’s part of the “hospitality industry.” Maybe they’re putting on a bit of an act, and wouldn’t give me the time of day if they were just another customer, but I think you overstate the case.
(Also…they want your money…and being friendly is a damn good way of increasing tips.)
Being friendly is not being a friend, which is the point. Bartenders are friendly because it’s part of their job, not because they like you in particular. (And no, that hooker isn’t coming on to you because she thinks you’re attractive.;))
Do you know them outside of work? You may have friends who are bartenders, but is your bartender (who you don’t know otherwise) your friend?
Aw, man. 
But at least it means she wants my money badly enough to put a little salesmanship into it.
As in you know people who just happen to be bartenders or after a few times of being at their bar you became friends to the point where you would get together outside the bar?
My experience is because of the nature of the bar business (working late at night and working weekends) they tend to only be friends with other bar workers.
Oh they can be right friendly alright but when you are at their bar they want to see you buying a drink.
If you are standing there holding a weapon, the police do not ask you nicely three times to please drop it and wait thirty seconds for you to make up your mind. This is one thing they do in Law and Order that drives me nuts.
The one time I witnessed such an encounter, the policeman said “Drop that chainsaw or I will shoot.” And you knew he meant it, and would shoot in about two seconds at most.
The guy dropped the chainsaw immediately.
I always thought it was a good thing that Jessica Fletcher traveled so much. If she’d stayed home, Cabot Cove probably would have had a population of about eight.
I always thought that she must have been a serial killer who was a genius at framing others. Wherever she was, at home or traveling, someone was murd ered.
Back in West Texas, my bartender ended up being my girlfriend for a while.
The MAD Magazine parody of the show was titled,“Murder, She Hopes” 
It’s “sudo enhance”, actually.
I often see people in movies jumping straight through a glass panel/window as a means of desperate escape (and they’re fine afterwards). Now, granted, I’ve never seen anyone attempt that in real life, but it seems like the kind of thing that wouldn’t work. Does glass really break into billions of tiny, harmless pieces upon impact with a body?
It’s actually “sudo -u God enhance”.
The most successful serial killer in history. Never caught, only suspected a couple of times. The only person possibly more clever was the psych professor that kept 6 other people in captivity for years on a small island, performing various forms of psychological torture on them.
Sometimes, toughened or tempered glass.
CMC fnord!
It seems really obvious, yet I actually didn’t know that. Ignorance fought.
I married a bartender, but she wasn’t my bartender. 
Mentioning the jumping through glass thing, “The Americans” actually did it right last week. Someone was trying to escape and got tackled right as he reached a door with big glass panes. He fell through the door and got impaled on a huge chunk of glass, right through his midsection. He proceeded to bleed out in moments, while the captors stood looking on with an “oh shit” on their face. They wanted him alive.