Actually I didn’t know that it was such a big deal because some of my friends and family have had to fly out of state or even out of the country for some of the weddings they’ve attended. Some of my friends were forced to take a week off just so they could attend their friend’s/family member’s wedding. They were so inconvenienced that I thought one day (with about a year and a half notice) shouldn’t be too bad, but again, I guess it was a bad assumption.
We discussed it tonight and we agreed that changing the date would be best because we want our wedding to be a celebration of our union with our loved ones. He’s liking the 28th, so let’s hope it works for when we start planning this summer!
Penchan, I apologize if this comes off as prying, but I feel like you’re leaving at least some of us hanging.
Are you intentionally not wanting to say what the significance of the 25th is for the two of you? If so, I think we can all respect that, but it isn’t clear to me if you don’t want to answer the question in any detail. You mentioned that it sounds right to you…you both felt this way right away? I just don’t personally think I’ve ever heard of a couple landing on a specific date without it having ties to something else of significance to them (or because it was convenient for whatever reason).
Again, apologies if this comes off as rude – I really am just curious.
At any rate, getting back to your original question, I agree with others who have said it’s worth changing the date as a convenience to yours guests if you’re hoping to have more people be able to attend and celebrate with you. However, if the two of you are tied to the 25th for a reason that’s meaningful to the two of you, I think that most of your family and friends will be understanding and try their best to be there for you.
If June 25 is that important, you could always have a civil ceremony at city hall or wherever on that date for you and then have a big wedding on the weekend for family and friends.
Well, if you were desperate to celebrate your wedding on the 58th anniversary of the beginning of the Korean War, would you want to tell everyone on some message board?
Nope, we’re graduating this spring, but we calculated that we’ll have saved enough money by then since we’re moving into my parent’s house to basically housesit as my parents retire and begin their transcontinental lifestyle. So we’ll have free rent until we decide to move out, but my parents really want me to stay in the house because they don’t want it to just sit there uninhabited while they travel.
I know we could always wait longer to save up more money and wait to have the 25th land on a Saturday. But we’re practically married already and it’s too long of a wait for something that’s not so important. If we marry in 2008, we’ll have been together for seven and a half years. I think that’s long enough to be together before get married, don’t you think? (Besides, I’m getting antsy as a good deal of my friends are engaged already.)
I’m really sorry, I thought I answered the question already! I didn’t think anyone would want to hear our non-concrete reason for picking that date. We sat down and thought of the best time of year to get married and June seemed the best. It’s not too hot or too cold around that time of year. Our younger friends would be out of school and our teacher friends would have finished teaching for the schoolyear. We would also like to marry around that time because we met around June and we saw it fit to have our relationship sort of come full circle.
As for the number, we like even numbers (I think it’s an Asian thing?) or blocked numbers (in 5’s). We threw out numbers and 25 seemed like a good number. We got together on December 25, 2000, which would make remembering our dating and wedding anniversary so much easier! So for the past two years we assumed we’d marry on June 25, 2008. But when I looked at the calendar to make sure everything was ok, I realized that it falls on a Wednesday. And here we are. We were reluctant because for the past two years we’ve been talking about our wedding taking place on the 25th and hey, after visualizing something for that long, you kind of want to stick with it.
But the people on this board has convinced us that having it on a Saturday so that we could share our special day with our loved ones is the best solution. So we’re tentatively changing the date to June 28, 2008. (Unless something else comes up crosses fingers)
We got married on a Friday- seems not to have been a big problem for our guests since over 100 people turned up (bearing in mind that only Jewish people are allowed to marry on a Sunday in the UK and Ireland, so about 80% of weddings are on Saturdays and the other 20% are almost all on Fridays).
Wednesday weddings at least have superstition on their side:
“Monday for wealth,
Tuesday for health,
Wednesday best day of all,
Thursday for losses,
Friday for crosses,
And Saturday no luck at all.”
In my experience, people who really want to go to your wedding will find a way to be there.
Sing it. I’ve never understood why when it comes to weddings, people suddenly feel justified in displaying a level of self-absorption that would usually only be acceptable in toddlers. (I’m not referring to the OP here, just a pet peeve of mine.)
I have good friends who were married on a Tuesday.
They were the fourth generation in his family to have that wedding date. Waiting until that date fell on a weekend would have meant waiting years.
It was a fairly large (over 100 people) evening wedding. Short ceremory performed by a Unitarian minister followed by dinner. No wedding dance. Photos were all taken in the afternoon before the ceremony. Almost no guests were from out of town.
It was a very good time, started at 6:00 and everyone was home at 10:00.
So it can work. Its an unusual day to get married, and you’ll want to keep everything short. I don’t think you could pull off an hour long Catholic mass, followed by full reception, from cocktails to dinner to dance on a weeknight. But you can pull off a ceremony and short reception - even dinner.
We got married on a Friday, at 4:00 in the afternoon. However, the wedding was by a JP in chambers and we had all of seven guests. We then had a party Friday night starting at 7:00. We only fed the seven who needed to transition from wedding to party.
Two good friends of mine have gotten married on Wednesdays, and I was maid of honor at one of those weddings. Given these friends and their husbands, I’d say they’re in for long, happy marriages, so I don’t see anything wrong with it.
You might want to consider what one of them did. She and her husband live in one state; their families and most of their friends live one state over. They were married in their state on a Wednesday at a civil ceremony, and held the reception where their families live on the following Saturday. This gave them a bit of the best of both worlds.
May you and your spouse to be enjoy many long years of happiness, whatever day you decide to marry.
Well, your reasoning isn’t as good as my hypotethical dead grandfather’s birthday, but it isn’t that bad. Many women dream of being June brides, and a fondness for “block numbers” or numbers ending in five is only slightly quirky. The most important thing that you have mentioned is the length of time which you have wanted this date. If you have been wanting this date for two years, it is starting to look less whimsical and more of a deeply held desire to have this date. Alert people in advance (maybe not quite yet) and perhaps consider making it a joke-“This way our wedding anniversary will be Christmas in June” (If you don’t celebrate Christmas,or your guests don’t, this may be awkward, but it’s worth a try).
Seriously, if having this date is important to you, even if for trivial reasons, there is no reason you can’t make it work. People will go to great trouble to attend weddings if they want to badly enough–with some caveats about having enough notice, having enough money, and being willing and able to travel at that time. Traveling on a weekend can be easier than travelling during the week, but that doesn’t mean that it is too much to ask of someone to ask them to take a few hours (or a couple of days) off from work to celebrate your wedding.
To me, the most important thing is this: you need to persuade people that this date is special not just a whim. From my point of view, saying “We have wanted to be married on this date ever since we decided to get married, our sophomore year in college” is somewhat silly, but if sufficient as long as you are sincere.
My husband and I managed to plan out our entire wedding before we saw that it was Labor Day weekend. We still pulled it off, get married when you want to, not when everyone else wants you to.
June 25, 2006 (06-25-06) is a Sunday. While Sunday weddings aren’t as common, it’s still the weekend, and it’s symmetrical, and as you said, you’re practically married already, so…change your financial expectations, have a small, fun wedding and go for it! Wasting tons of money on weddings just makes me ill (and I’m in a business that thrives on expensive weddings) when you can have something small, creative and much more meaningful for very little money. There have been several wonderful threads here detailing some amazing weddings that happened for little cash. So do it! This year! Now! Yippee!
Don’t underestimate the op’s maturity… Good for you to make the thing on a sat.
It’s not about your hoo-hoo or his pee-pee or numerology, it’s about the comfort of your guests.
If you invited me to a wedding, and it was on a Wednesday, and I asked why, and you said, “we chose it more than two years ago - we like even numbers,” I would be really really pissed.
OTOH, if you said it was because it was the date bup met buppess in 1989, I’d understand.
We got married on the Sunday before Memorial Day. I remember thinking “Hey, holiday weekend. Everyone can make it. They’ll all have Monday off.”
Lot’s of people attended and it went off well.
But a few weeks afterwards I wondered how many people disliked having to plan their entire holiday weekend around our wedding dropped in the middle of it.
I got married on a Wednesday - because the date itself meant a lot to us. We had a small wedding with just very close family, so it wasn’t a problem being on a weekday.
