Why? If they make a try at it but can’t supply one or more of the sounds correctly, then they themselves will supply the substitute: plain R for a rolled one, English ch for a gutteral, whatever. Why should the person whose name it is have to guess what somebody else can or can’t produce as a sound?
I’d ask the child. ‘Sorry, I’m not sure how to say your name. Could you pronounce it for me?’
And then make my best try at it; several times over if necessary, with the child correcting me. If I still can’t get it, apologize and say I’ll keep trying; and possibly mention briefly that speakers of any language have sounds that they can’t pronounce, or sometimes even hear, but that are normal in other languages.
Yeah, like I said, my name is Marita. But it’s apparently way too weird for a big chunk of the population to even try pronouncing.
When I get told “that’s too hard; I’ll just call you Mary/Rita” I say “and I’ll just call you Fred!” They get all upset “my name isn’t Fred!” Yeah, and mine isn’t Mary or Rita.
I mean, when a Chinese TA in Botany could only pronounce it as Mah-rit-ta, I accepted that because he tried. I smile internally when some of my Spanish speaking co-workers roll my r. But decide that my name is “too hard”? Yeah, go eff yourself.
In my experience with my 12 year old son, kids no longer mock each other about their names, unless it’s really outrageous. When every kid in his class has a “unique” name, there’s no way to choose one in particular to pick on.
In my experience, kids will also mock other kids about their names even if those names are utterly standard for the majority culture. My entirely standard English-language first name got mocked to the point at which I developed a lifelong distaste for it, by a kid rhyming it with everything he could think of in a nasty sing-song voice.
Every language has sounds that it can and cannot make. For example, my brother-un-law’s name is Tzach, a common Israeli name that no American in history has ever pronounced correctly. So when speaking with Americans, he goes by Zack. He doesn’t resent this; it’s just how their language works.
Because if Keith moves to Israel, where most people can’t pronounce the “th”, he knows whether he prefers to be called Keef or Keet or Kees, all of which are comparably plausible to an Israeli. (This example stolen from my Israeli boss trying to guess the best thing to call one of my co-workers. He was going to go with “Kees”, which linguistically has certain merits, and I suggested that wasn’t the best choice.)
I don’t think it’s a crazy burden to be aware of what sounds most of the people you live with can make.
A good faith effort is all I ask for. But alas, there are a non trivial amount of people out there who either can’t be bothered or feel like they need to make some kind of point by purposely mispronouncing.
fyi, I would feel incredibly awkward if you did this. Please, give it one or two tries, and then move on.
(My name is easy for English-speakers to say, and I do expect them to get it right if I interact with them more than briefly. But it can be hard for people who don’t speak English. I really really don’t want to be put on the spot to coach them to make just the right vowel sound.)
I told my 3 kids that when they have children, they should give them simple, common names, like Bill, Bob, or Bonnie. Bibbidi, Bobbidi, and Boo said that’s what they planned to do.
Keith Richards has always been known as Keef, because that’s how you say it in Estuary English (Keef is from Dartford).
I note however, that his manager insisted on calling him Keith Richard, probably because it sounds like Cliff Richard (I don’t suppose he was very happy about that).
Ironically when some parents pick a common name in hopes the kid won’t stand out, it can be so common that they end up standing out in a different way. I have a common name, and at my workplace there are 4 others with the same name. Every time there’s a question for one of us, the asker has to take an extra step or two to identify which of us they are asking. There’s even some duplication in the first letter of our last names:
Mmmiiikkkeee, what do you think about (topic)?
(All 4 of us): which one of us are you asking?
“Mmmiiikkkeee S.”
Which of the two Mmmiiikkkeee S.'s do you mean?
Many times I’ve wished to be the only one in the room with my name.
I think most of us when hearing an unusual name do a double-take. A few here mentioned that as long it can be easily pronounced when read or to spell it, not a big deal. Friends and co-workers will get used to it.
The thing is, you don’t know the child’s future. They may move to another country, speaking a different language and their name may be unusual in that country. I have known many such people. There was Ramine in high school who came from Iran. I had a date with an Imane, can’t remember where she was from. Hamdam I believe is also from Iran, Hasan, Hussam, Nava and a few others I’m forgetting. King is unusual, I thought it was a nickname but I learned that many parents in Nigeria name their kids for what they want them to become in life. Little baby Bob may one day go to some far way place where his name may be strange, asked to repeat or spell it, it may even be offensive. Name your kid pretty much whatever you want.
Any name can be confusing in this day and age. I have a very common French name, Pierre. But whenever I get a telemarketing call from a non-Canadian, or call customer service of a big company and it’s obviously off-shore, they just don’t know how to pronounce it. I correct them or if I don’t want to be bothered say nobody here by that name. Don’t get me started on my last name, I was nearly nicknamed Dishwasher in the army thanks to a buddy making a play on words on my last name.
Positive. Talked to him last night in fact, he’s a member of the Nigerian-Canadian business network and recently was in Nigeria.
You reminded me of Gillette and I never heard of King Vidor. Guess it’s not that unusual of a name. Royal I had heard of, mainly a French name but still unusual, at least to me.
