Well if thats too long, How about one of these?
“No problem is so big you can’t run away from it.”
“Never raise your hand to children, it leaves your midsection open.”
“The public will believe anything, so long as it is not founded on truth.”
“First things first, but not necessarily in that order.”
Or maybe…
“Here’s Yogi”
:):):):):)
BBT – just my humble opinion, but if you’ve spent much time on-line, you’ve likely heard all of those before. Or are you lucky enough not to be the recipient of endless e-mails full of cutesy slogans, bumper stickers, sayings for tee shirts, ad nauseam?
I’d go with nika’s suggestion – it’s the only way you’ll get something truly original.
Personally, Dennis Leary has one of my favorite quotes from “Lock and Load” (I’m paraphrasing here)
“I don’t spank my children. I don’t have to. I find just waving the gun around pretty much does the trick.”
Slovenian Proverb:
“Speak the truth, but leave immediately after.”
Or use all of 'em one at a time?
Mine’s from the poem “Gunga Din” by Rudyard Kipling.
Sorry it’s taken me so long to thank you for teaching me about smilies. I am especially touched since you did this against your better judgement, and I promise not to use them in your general vicinity. It is the least I can do to repay your kindness.
Hope all is well in bedrock!
Scotti
You could try “You are what you eat… and I eat cats.” But only if you credit me. Random sayings off 80s television shows also work well, I’ve found.
DRY, you have no clue how hard you made me laugh. A couple of nights ago, I actually had a dream that included the SDMB, and one of the things that happened was that I dreamt that you found a couple of Shakepearean references to felching. I woke up and laughed about it, deciding that it was a sign that I’d been spending too much time here. Then, I read that post of yours above.
Sheesh, man, is there anything that the Bard didn’t talk about?
Chronos, most of the quotes I’ve used previously have been via printing out one internet site’s Famous Shakespearean Quotations, broken down by play, and reading and highlighting the ones I liked. (Also some quotes I’ve memorized by seeing certain plays repeatedly)
I found plenty that can be used to illustrate oral sex, as used in the Prom Queen and Supreme Temptress threads:
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=25843
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=26388
and elsewhere. Oh, and don’t ask why my “blowjob” replies are always to Diane… 
However, Grace absolutely, positively floored me with that post to this thread. You know, there’s nothing like sitting in front of your computer at 4:00 in the morning having been absolutely floored by a slam that you never, for the life of you, saw coming (no pun intended). I sat here with a glazed look on my face for a half hour, at least, wondering how the hell I was going to respond to that.
I finally decided that I’d make some sort of play on the similarity between the words “fellatio” and “felching”, and, since I was running out of Shakespearean blowjob quotes, ran a search on “tongue” in his plays. When I saw “tongue” and “tail” in the same line, well, I HAD to use that quotation.
I really never expected to find a Shakespearean quote illustrative of felching. I don’t know if there are any others. (A while back, I was tempted to open a “Ask the Deviant Shakespearean Scholar” thread, but decided I’m unpopular enough as it is.)
Lemme know if you have any other dreams of Shakespearean references to bizzare sexual practices. And see, take your dream, and what happened, as a sign that (heh) you should spend MORE time here! 
Fellatio. Felching. It’s easy to see how a girl could get confused. I’d like to thank DRY for telling me the difference between the two.
He encouraged me to give fellatio to the male posters at the Houston gathering. I’m not sure that the restaurant is going to appreciate all the mess but I’m willing to give it a go. I’m quite sure that I will be the hit of the Houston gathering!! Now just to be clear about this…we are talking about mud masks like they do at the spa, right??? 
And Chronos, I say we try to think of a challenge for our friend here. There has to be something that DRY can’t come up with an appropriate quote. Think Man Think!
Res ipsa loquitor. :eek:
Ask Coldfire to explain the latter.
(Though he may be happy to explain the former, too. 
“Parking Lots”
“Bathrooms”
Oh, and I must say that this…err…fetish…puts a new spin on your sig:
**
You know, you two are beginning to scare me…