Silly Things You Imagined as a Child

In My Humble Opinion
1

I want to stress that I never thought this would happen, but I often imagined that in every person’s life, at one time or another they would see somebody they had never seen before, and would have an uncontrollable urge to go over and kick the shit out of them. You’d be walking down the street, and all of a sudden a man would leap in the air screaming at someone, and proceed to smash his face in. It was understood by everyone that you couldn’t stop this urge, so no arrests would ever be made. Everyone else would just keep walking, realizing this guy had just saw his “secret enemy” and did what he had to do.

Well, that’s mine. The floor is open.

2

(I hope yours wasn’t a repressed memory, just too much adult TV at a tender age.)

When I was a kid, I thought butter came from cow’s milk and all cheese from goat’s milk.

I also thought chunky peanut butter included the whole peanut, even the shells.

3

I thought people had babies while on the toilet.

I also thought I could change myself into a unicorn if only I concentrated hard enough!

4

notcynical, do you realize what an awesome premise for a satire that would be?

(I thought your name was notcyclical for a minute.)

5

I was about 4 yrs old. I had never seen a color TV, but I had watched a black & white one a couple of times.

When my folks finally got around to buying a TV, they polled us kids and asked if we should get a black & white or “colored” TV.

I opted for black & white. I had seen one and the people on it had looked like everyone in the real world. I thought that if we got a colored TV, only “colored” people would be on it. I wanted to see everyone.

6

~~Whenever my parents and I were riding out of a city and
were about 20 miles away, I’d look back and imagine a
nuclear mushroom cloud rising over the city… I’d even see
the shockwaves go by where we were…

I’d get in trouble for making imaginary snowballs and
throwing them in class… not at people, just at the wall
this was when I was very little… my teachers thought
something was wrong with me and I don’t think they
wanted me in their class… They talked to my mom once…

Even now when I have trouble getting to sleep, I pretend
that I’m hiding from aliens… like that girl did in Aliens II
(think it was Aliens II, is that right?)… she had a
hide-out that the aliens couldn’t get to

Oh yeah, still now…when I’m riding up on some car I fire
rockets at then and blow them away… this is only if it’s
pretty far off to begin with

7

No, I haven’t quite frankly. I have imagined a funny slapstick short film, however.

8

I do the same thing! I usually have a cigarette in my hand and I pretend that it’s a gun or a rocket. I even make the sound effect!

When I was a kid I used to imagine that I was a spy and someone was watching my every move. I’d pretend that I had top secret information in my backpack and I had to make it home by a certain time… so the bad guys didn’t get me and steal the top secret information.

9

When I was a kid, I thought I could levitate.

I convinced myself that if I concentrated real hard, I could become weightless. I was sure that as I concentrated on floating, I could feel myself getting lighter. Somehow despite my efforts I could never quite manage to become light enough to float off the ground.

I should have kept up at it. I could have become a new age guru.

10

I once asked my mommy (as she then was) what a belly button was for. She replied something like “the tube that connected you to me before you were born was attached there.” Fair enuf. But I thereafter tried to reconcile the ideas that 1) at some point I was in her tummy, and 2) at a later point there was a tube connecting my belly button to hers. Was it that a tube would somehow grow out of her belly button (with me at its end), then somehow reenter her body? Or did babies grow in a subcutaneous area of a woman later to plop off (kind of like a scab), to reveal a belly button underneath?

I still can’t figure it out.

11

i flew with my parents a lot as a child. i believed that the plane and everyone in it were perfectly balanced. so if i got out of my seat, the balance would be disturbed and the plane would flip over and crash. i guess i never noticed other people getting up to go to the bathroom.

needless to say, i was very good on flights. no fidgeting or being disruptive.

12

I used to believe that people practiced “the Golden Rule.” Right! :rolleyes:

13

I believed that when I grew up I would always know what the right thing to do would be.

14

I remember when I learned the concept of the “Year” and thinking that every year was 1975
Scary thought nowadays.

15

Any time a Sit Com used to announce “Happy Days was taped before a live studio audience”
I had a hard time. I was always wondering if it was taped before the audience was alive then wouldn’t the previous audience be alive… but if it was taped before the audience was alive then wouldn’t the audience be before that audience but it was befiore they were alive so wouldn’t…
Was this taped in the caveman days?
I was a little weirdo then… now I’m just nuts.

16

I used to pretend I could “eat” all the other cars while I was in the back seat. I could eat the car on my right, on my left, etc. Then they would make the car I was in bigger, add a room to it… If the person looked nice to me he/she would be a guest in my huge hotel car and if the person looked mean to me he/she would become our buttler or mechanic ! It was so cool…

17

I used to think that when you became a grown-up, you weren’t scared of things anymore.

I used to think the world was in black in white and suddenly changed to color one magical day.

I thought that if you climbed to the top of a very tall tree, you could touch the sky.

Sheri

18

I used to believe that if I had my navel pricked with a pin, it would pop, and I would fly around the room like a deflating balloon, limbs flailing, hitting walls. I also believed that I could be drawn down the drain of the bathtub. Of course, my knowledge of the laws of physics was derived mostly from Looney Tunes cartoons, so I wasn’t exactly the brightest bulb in the drawer…

A friend once told me that if I went to Germany, I would die - I believed him. I believed that I’d drop dead at the border - just collapse as soon as I reached Germany.

I was a dumb kid.

19

Great topic, but it’s been done before.

And I should know, because I started this thread.

20

When I was little, like most kids I didn’t like taking baths. My mother would tell me that if I didn’t take a bath the guys from the Health Department would come and take me away.

I remember having this very clear vision of these two guys dressed all in black, wearing sunglasses and carrying briefcases, who would show up at my door someday and carry me away. I never got as far as speculating about where they might take me.