Why? At this point in time they are legal (though hard to afford or access for many women), but no man can guarantee what his partner would do in case of accidental pregnancy. Even if she’s on birth control, she could need $30 for Plan B or child support for the next 18 years. Whatever the laws on abortion. Yet I think you’ll find there are plenty of guys willing or even eager to ditch the condom. How would a change in the laws change their actions?
Anyway, isn’t it about time ‘someone’ started a thread about, I don’t know, how all women have turned into sluts who cheat and are ruining society by opening their legs or something? Because there are several threads right now on the Dope that all seem to be headed that way (though it warms my heart that the OPs aren’t getting much support).
I would suggest that the “yes” answers to your poll may not mean “I’ll be less promiscuous”, just “I’ll be more careful about doing things that might get me pregnant while still being promiscuous”.
I personally found your OP very confusing and did not take your poll as a result. Two interpretations of what “think twice” means:
My first thought, before reading the OP: Would I take extra contraceptive precautions?
Answer: Yes. Right now I do not want to use hormonal contraceptives; if I had no access to surgical abortion or “morning after” pills (neither of which, knock on wood, I have yet had to resort to), I might consider it.
From the OP: “Would you be less likely to go to bed with guys? Would you be more selective about the men you slept with?”
Answer: No. I am already extremely selective and being any more selective would probably result in no sex at all.
I am single, but I am pretty sure that getting married wouldn’t change much about my answers. I don’t think that many married women wish to have lots of children, nor do most wish to be entirely abstinent, so they also need contraception, and, at times, abortion.
If that’s the case, then shouldn’t you talk about this before having sex? Make sure your views on abortion are known, and not have sex with someone who WOULD have an abortion, if you’re so against it?
This. In my time working as an abortion escort, I accompanied many women who were married. Usually, they were having an abortion because their primary birth control failed (this was also usually the reason why single women were getting abortions). Sometimes, they were victims of domestic violence, and this last time that he raped her as part of his little ritual was the straw that broke the camel’s back, and she was divorcing him, and she didn’t want to have that child, and she didn’t want his genes to be perpetuated (she didn’t want to give up the child for adoption). Sometimes they were getting a divorce for somewhat milder reasons, but still the woman didn’t want a reminder of him around. Or the guy was going into prison for a long stretch, and she didn’t feel that she could raise the child alone. A couple of times, the woman’s husband or longtime lover had died, and she had never really wanted kids anyway, so she was terminating the pregnancy. I never asked, but just about every woman felt the need to tell me why she was having the procedure done. I guess they felt that we’d probably never see each other again, and that I was supportive of their choice, and they needed to unburden. Most of the time, the woman would have aborted whether she was married or single. So the original question was very flawed, making the assumption that married women don’t abort.
I did meet some of the women who were repeat customers…who said that they didn’t really support abortions, but that THEY needed one this time. I tried not to think about their viewpoints that much, because I could tell that they were being deeply hypocritical.
Now, there were a couple of little girls (somewhere between 12 and 15, usually) who hadn’t been using birth control, and their moms or other guardians were forcing them to get an abortion. These little girls were actually hoping to get pregnant, and sort of planning on it, so that their (adult) boyfriends would marry them and take them out of their parents’ houses and they could be grownups themselves. The adult boyfriends were all “adults” who worked in McDonald’s or similar jobs as fry cooks, and lived with THEIR parents. Yep, I could see that these little girls would have a bright happy future with those guys.
