Been there, done that. As I look back at it now as a married man, I regret every day of it.
Back to the OP
Its in the personality, baby. Since you and your friends all seem to be in the same boat, look at your situation?
Do you get out? I am not saying to a bar to get pissed, but if you are looking for a piece of ass they are still the best place to go. Especially since a lot of women there are really shallow and may be right up your alley.
Flipside, do you and your friends sit around all weekend/night playing Diablo or Quake 3 and eat nachos and cornchips? Are you in semi decent shape? Women usually want guys that are attractive too (not saying they’re all shallow, but they see a person and what they look like before they get into their mind and see what makes them tick).
Sit back and look at yourself and your friends objectively. There will probably be several reasons you ain’t gittin’ the girls and other guys are.
Thought number one: Single? Has all teeth? Has hair too? Sign me up!! :rolleyes:
Thought number two: Hey! I have all my teeth and hair too, so why don’t I have a woman? Tee hee.
Unfortunately, that’s not enough qualifications to make the cut. (There’s more to a good man than just teeth and hair; heck, there’s more to a good tumor than just teeth and hair.)
Zene111, since your idea of “humor” is to suggest feeding a stray cat to a Doberman, it’s no wonder why you and your ravishing friends can’t find “woman”(I’d try better grammar as well). I visualize you as a pimply-faced kid sitting at home for the summer, wondering how he can cheese people off, and giggling because he has had any replies at all. And if you really are well educated and have a good job then Bart Simpson got older, but never grew up.
What’s wrong with women? Nothing. Women rule. They’re soft and they smell good. [sub]Now where’s that fiancee of mine?[/sub]
Why are you single? I’ve heard this question many times from nice single guys. The answer is almost always either:
Because you aren’t asking (enough) women out.
Because you are really bad at asking women out.
(This is all assuming that you’re not ugly, or a complete jerk. Although I’ve known lots of attractive females who seem to love dating jerks, so that may not hurt you.)
Your OP makes you seem like a bit of a dork, but I’m guessing your problem is both #1 and #2. Maybe you could enlighten us?
When you say you’ve got all your teeth and hair, you’re not, like, keeping them in a box under your bed or anything are you? Because that might be a problem.
Thank you hon, I was just gonna comment on that. I know one little girl he’s not getting his hands on soon. BTW…How is your dobie, Zene? Still your bestest and onwy widdew fwiend?
It is amazing looking at all the replies. I cannot believe anybody has taken the question seriously. Anybody that has taken it seriously has a definite lack of humor, come on people. If somebody asked you this question in person, would you not laugh? I would hate to think that some people have nothing better to do than ponder over and reply to a question as stupid as this one with seriousness. After all, it is in MPSIMS section . Wake up.
Something from this thread has been preying on my mind…
There’s something wrong here. I’m a dorky, ugly guy, where’s my killer babe? I want my killer babe, dammit!!
… I’ll compromise, if I have to. I’ll settle for a robber babe or an arsonist babe. In fact, even an illegally parked babe would be an improvement right now…
Aha. That right there is why, despite having all your teeth and hair, you are still single.
You are only paying attention to attractive women. There are probably plenty of average, plain, and even - yes - homely women who have been giving signals in your vicinity but you either chose to ignore them, or were too busy drooling over the unattainable.
Here’s a tip for you:
Every woman is beautiful when she climaxes.
Here’s an exercise. Go to a grocery store or laundromat or someplace in your neighborhood where women don’t necessarily get all groomed up to go. Imagine how every woman’s face you see there would look in the throes of orgasm. Now see how many more options there are??
There are more lessons where that came from. Next week - why plump women are better.
You’re confusing me with the OP. He’s the good looking one, you don’t want to know what I look like.
If “KEEP AWAY FROM ME YOU DROOLING PERVERT!!!” counts as a signal, you’re absolutely right.
Errrr… two problems with this. First, it’s a bit creepy even by my standards. Second, I’ve forgotten what a woman looks like in the throes of orgasm. (Is it like the throes of malaria? Scarlet fever? Dysentery?)
Well, not really. I just used your comment as an opportunity. I suspect the OP is guilty of my accusation, too.
Well, jeez dude, don’t leer at 'em. When you encounter any woman, just briefly imagine what their expressions would look like under those circumstances. Keep a poker face.
The whole point is that women don’t have to be “babes” to be sexy.
Go rent some girl-girl porno tapes. If they aren’t actually climaxing in those tapes, they do a pretty damn good acting job.
(And make sure to wipe off the cassette before you return it!)
Zene, having all your teeth and hair means nothing if you keep them in a jar next to your bed. That is just creepy you teeth-hair-in-a-jar type of person. You may want to take out the hair and glue it to your head. You may do better if you shave your pubic hair and glue it to your eyebrows (girls like long bushy pubey looking eyebrows… they are weird that way). You should also start carrying your teeth around with you. Also, to every woman you meet, tell her that blowjobs feel better without teeth. If she doesn’t believe you, offer her… or if that fails tell her to go farm the graveyard at the nursing home. She will soon see the error of her ways and come running to you. Oh, chicks also like chauvenistic behaviour. So treat all the women around you like property. Maybe after you are castrated it won’t matter that you are alone. Since none of this is true, I would have to take it that you are just dense around women. I don’t ever think women flirt with me but I see men doing it all the time. You just have to learn what the cues are and not feel uncomfortable talking to them.
I talk like this with my friends (female) all the time, it’s good for laughs :).
You may want to take out the hair and glue it to your head. You may do better if you shave your pubic hair and glue it to your eyebrows (girls like long bushy pubey looking eyebrows… they are weird that way). You should also start carrying your teeth around with you. Also, to every woman you meet, tell her that blowjobs feel better without teeth. If she doesn’t believe you, offer her… or if that fails tell her to go farm the graveyard at the nursing home. She will soon see the error of her ways and come running to you. Oh, chicks also like chauvenistic behaviour. So treat all the women around you like property. Maybe after you are castrated it won’t matter that you are alone.