Oh, good! Your yearly bath, whether you need it or not.
[aside] Look, I recognize “Dead Poets” was a lame comeback but DAMN, Malacandra! Congratulations for successfully switching gears and throwing me.[/aside]
Creditors. Luckily I hacked into your account via the trojan virus I uploaded to your machine while we were talking earlier and switched identities, so now YOU get explain to my mob bookies, “Visa” and the Student Loan Corporation why I said to “Sod off, mate. You’ve rung up the wrong gent on the telly.”
Creditors? As in, people who lent you money? Willingly? Egad, Phineas T. Barnum didn’t say the half of it. :smack:
No, the extra one I rushed off for when I noticed that you’d polluted this thread. All for nothing, evidently. You’re not still contagious, are you? 
Don’t you remember the last time we spent together, baby?
TV? TV? You watch TV? Don’t you know that TV is directly responsible for every social problem of the last 50 years? No, of course you wouldn’t. You’re too ignorant and steeped in violence by all your TV-watching to have an actual thought like that. I’ve never owned a TV, and it makes me a better person than all of you who have TV’s.
You’re talking on your cell phone while you’re driving again, aren’t you? Don’t you know that Driving While Cell Phoning causes more car accidents than drunk driving? I’m sure you don’t care. You have a big honkin’ SUV, so you’ll be OK when you crash into a Geo Metro and kill the family in it. They must be too poor to buy an SUV, so you’re doing the country a favor by driving down the poverty rate when you kill them.
TV, heck, i got you beat, i don’t even know what TV is, sounds like some form of disease, doesn’t it
I love the snow, and skiing is fun, Mad River Glen is the best ski area on the planet
oxygen is good
She seemed really interested when I told her about Pookie The Two Entry Dildo.
Yes. Yes, I do. Despite all the therapy. However, I’m learning to cope with it, to the extent that actually seeing your name on the screen no longer physically nauseates me. At least, when I say “physically”, I’m assured it’s just psychosomatic.
Kind of you to ask, though. :eek:
Oxygen is a poison, ya doof.
9/11 would never have happened if it weren’t for oxygen allowing the fuel in the jets to burn and causing the fires that made the towers collapse. You’re glad 9/11 happened, aren’t you, terrorist?
If you knew how to use a real operating system, you could get a better job. I’m sure someday you will make fry tech at Mickey D’s if you study really hard for your MCSE exams.
sorry, but no, i have no desire to support the Redmond Collective (motto; “Resistance is Futile, you will be assimilated”) by getting a MCSE, i don’t do windoze, besides, according to the PC tech at my old job, MCSE actually stands for “Must Consult Someone Experienced”
i like Sushi
Ooo, good one. Let me ask you - who are you paying to write your posts for you? 'Cause I’m *sure * you didn’t come up with that all by your lonesome.
Ignorant s***head fool. Everybody knows it stands for “Minesweeper Consultant and Solitaire Expert.”
You’ll get worms! This is the Straight Dope Message Board, and even here nobody reads Cecil’s classic columns.
Just because you can’t handle any form of sexual expression other than heterosexual sex in the missionary position, doesn’t make those who do things your tiny little mind would never think of “sick” or “wrong”.
I did, but it was so tiny. I’m still hungry.
Sig line.
Poseur.
I like Bukkake.
cite <— Not a work-safe link - SkipMagic
I see that you are one of the astute few who recognize the true dangers of oxygen; my congratulations! Fortunately, I can help you protect yourself from this deadly gas. Here, just put this plastic bag over your head and you will never again be exposed to oxygen’s toxic fumes.