Skeletons in the closet – a scandalous MMP

Skammer wins. Hands down. No need for anbody else to share scandal. From now on it’s just hijack all the way. WHOA!!!:eek:


The picture on the wall “That’s great grandma, she sold the slaves to buy the farm in Iowa.” Not got out of slavery, just sold them to buy a better piece of property.

My mom was knocked up. Dad calls his parents for an intro to a Doc for abortions (this was in the early 60s). They tell him to get his ass home with her instead. One quick wedding, mom moves in with my Grandma, dad goes back to college. They still won’t admit it (I had to play detective).

My Aunt - adopted (she does not know to my knowledge). My grandparents ran a home for girls who needed to leave town for a bit. Part of their operation was setting up adoptions, and when the delivery was done the doc would fill out the birth certificate with the names of the adoptive parents.

A cousin who was adopted by my great uncle was actually the daughter of his sister the nun.

I’m enjoying all these stories, but I’m kinda disappointed that no one has a bootlegger or a woman of ill repute or a kidnapper somewhere in the family tree. No great-aunt Mildred who was a strip-tease artiste? I kinda hoped Dopers were more colorful. :wink:

Altho the witches are kinda cool.

I’m showered, dressed for comfort, and about to assume the knit position. Tomorrow, I plan to run to Lowe’s and get some impatiens and plant them among the hostas that I transplanted today. I may get some other sun-loving colorful plants to fill in where I removed the hostas from the front garden.

The drillers are planning to start around 6:30. I may wait till they’re done - I’m not sure I want to be away from home while a crew of strangers are making a deep hole in my front yard…

But for now, I’m going to veg the night away.


Not as juicy as some of these, but about a decade ago I discovered I had an honest-to-goodness long-lost cousin. One of my uncles had fooled around a bit as a teen and gotten a girl pregnant, but she wanted nothing to do with him afterwards. Well, the kid grew up, and when she turned 18, decided that she wanted to get back in touch with her father. My mom was one of her first points of contact in tracking him down.

Oh, and my father was either gay or bi, but never admitted it (he was one of those “We must all fight the temptation!”-style homophobes), and one of his sisters is a lesbian who does admit it when she considers it safe to do so. I personally don’t consider that scandalous, but my dad’s family would.

I don’t remember any good family skeleton stories - maybe I’ll write to my mom who has spent he last 20+ years studying our family history for some good ones.

SAme said mom celebrates her 80th birthday tomorrow. The family got together this Saturday in honor of it. Good times; have not seen my Uncle James & Aunt Robin in probably 10 years or more. Fun was had by all.

Happy belated gigitymom birthday!

Well, skeletons, I have a few. No, I have a lot.

My maternal great-grand father was excommunicated from the Catholic church for being a child rapist. That would be my grandmother. My mother being the progeny. They moved to America for a “clean slate.”

My mother divorced my “father” 18 months before I was born. He moved out of state shortly after the divorce, so, :dubious:.

My youngest aunt never revealed who fathered her first child, so, he too, was left in limbo.

All that aside, today is a beautiful day, and none of that changes anything. Even though I am, indirectly, a product of incest, I’m smart, have all my toes and fingers and the correct number of eyes, noses and ears. ( no, I only have one nose.) And I don’t really care. :cool:

Harvey, if you see this before leaving, drive safe.


I come from a very catholic family just to put these into perspective.

My sister got divorced about 15 years ago (after 10 years of marriage & 3 kids) because her husband had an affair, this all came out about five months after his (mid 50’s) father had a ‘nervous breakdown’ and disappeared. He’d actually decided to ditch his family and go live with his girlfriend.

Sis now lives with her partner who is an awesome guy, her kids love him.

Their being unmarried made it a lot easier on me when I got my girlfriend of 4 months pregnant (I was 35 she was 32 at the time)! We got married about 18 months after our first son was born while she was pregnant with our second boy - three years this year & going strong! :slight_smile: But boy, the lead up to telling my parents they were going to be grand-parents again was pretty stressful.

The extended family: I knew my paternal grandmother and aunt didn’t like each other much but only a few years ago found out why. They all lived in a small country town with my uncle running the family farm. My aunt was having an affair with another local guy and it was one of those ‘everyone knows but no one will tell’ deals where everyone in the district except my uncle knew what was going on. My grandmother told him.

Uncle & aunt are still together but she never forgave my grandparents for interfering, to the point of causing a huge scene at her own son’s funeral because she decided at the last minute that she didn’t want him buried next to my grandfather. When my grandmother died we had to contact the town police and get them to watch the house until we got there so the aunt didn’t take everything for ‘safe-keeping’.

Aw, thank you. I am actually delayed a day just now, because I came down with the crud my dad was complaining about. Headache, nausea, exhaustion, and overall wretchedness. I just could not get all my stuff done today, so I have been focusing on sleeping. Tomorrow, I will get stuff packed and finished up and then take off on Wednesday.

My grandmother may have shot someone. The details are very fuzzy, but what I know is the following:

  1. the person did get shot
  2. my grandmother was present
  3. he needed shootin’
  4. nobody was prosecuted

edit to add: the shooting victim didn’t die.

Mosier, your post cracked me up! Heck of a way to start my day! :smiley:

Good morning and Happy Tuesday! I’m waiting for the well guys to show up and start putting a deep hole in the front yard. **FCD **wants pictures and I forgot to put the batteries in the charger last night - I hope they can get enough juice in the 40 minutes or so till the crew shows up… (yes, I have an ancient camera that uses AA batteries - at least it’s digital. :stuck_out_tongue: )

No idea how long it’ll take them or if the rain that’s coming this way will cause a problem. Stoopit rain. We shall see. The rain will affect me working in the gardens, tho. So maybe no impatiens today. But fiddle-dee-dee, there’s always tomorrow, or something. I can’t pull off the southern belle thing too well, especially in shorts, a T, and sneaks. I think I’d need a hoop skirt to be even remotely convincing. Wouldn’t you say so, swampy?? :smiley:

Off to find something breakfast-like…

Good Mornin’ Y’all! Up and caffienatin’. YAWN ‘Tis 68 Amurrkin out and very muggy and humid already with a predicted high of 93 and if this mornin’ is any indication, there will probably be a heat index near a hunnert. May is startin’ off actin’ like Summer for sure.

kanga sorry for the crud. Here’s hopin’ you get everything done and get outta there tomorrow. You need this trip.

Mosier if he needed shootin’ then who could blame your grandmother. :smiley:

Battle Pope Catholic, pregnant girlfriend and livin’ in sin. You know how to do it up right! :smiley:

picu it’s always comfortin’ to know all the appendages are there ain’t it.

Ok, that’s all I got for now. I need more caffiene and rumbly tummy wants to be fed. Then, alas, irk purtification must commence.

Happy Tuesday and May Day! Get your Maypoles out and dance!

ETA: MOOOOOOM from what I see around here, you could pull off southern belle in a tubetop, Daisy Dukes and flipflops. Plus, always dressed for Wally*World. Win-win all the way round! We wanna see well diggin’ pitchers too!

The way I’m shaped, a tube top and Daisy Dukes would look more like 2 rubber bands around an egg… :stuck_out_tongue:

And yes, I’ll have well-diggin’ pics in my photobucket, just for you!

Where I lived in North Carolina, #3 was a valid legal defense.

AFAIK, this is still the case in Texas.

**Phouka **-- please don’t try it out when you get there! :eek: We’re all way to far away to spring your bail!

(and hope you feel better, and have a good trip down there.

Are you taking the dog…? :D)

The well guys are here and it just started raining. So far, they’re not packing up to go - here’s hoping it doesn’t rain bad enough to make them stop working.

I’ve got a few photos but I’m staying way out of their way. I want a well more than I want pictures.

How selfish of you MOOOOOOM! How could you put your need for decent water pressure ahead of Mumper needs to see pics of the well diggin’? Really! :stuck_out_tongue:

Now that I’ve posted that, I gotta get outta here and go deliver bad news. I hate to do that. However, that’s a part of irk I reckon. I thought we had a waiver extension for somebody to be on the program another year. Matter of fact I was told we had the waiver and she was told so as well. However, TPTB have decided not to grant the waiver after all so I get to go deliver the news. :frowning: and :mad:

Are you going to get close enough to find out just how cold their asses get?