We can save “shitload” and “buttload” for later, then.
3/5ths of fuck all around here.
“Missed it by a poofteenth of an inch” is heard in Oz, but I wouldn’t call it common.
Also, particularly in cricket, the minimum measure is “a coat of varnish”. As in “another coat of varnish on those stumps and Warne would have had him bowled”.
This is wicked geeky, but with the right audience, if I were asked to take a little more off, I might ask “Epsilon or delta?”.
Aye, I’e heard and used “a coat of paint” all my life to describe something that was just small enough (“another coat of paint and it wouldn’t have fit”) or a bit too big (“one coat of paint too many”).
My father says “poofteenth” and I’ve never heard anyone else say it. I thought it was his own thing. Turns out not so.
That’s what I grew up learning was the smallest measurement known to man. Until I dated a red-head. Those are some DAMN COARSE hairs, matey! Blonde ones are much finer.
Asshole = the smallest measurement of time that is defined as “the time between when the light turns green and the asshole behind you hits the horn”
Can also be known as prick, shithead, and other colorful terms of endearment.
I first realized that I was hanging around to many fellow math majors when I realized I started using the phrase “within epsilon” in public to express a small amount.
Physicists use epsilon, too. “This paper is just an epsilon improvement over the existing literature.”
In pathologist speak, a teeny tiny biopsy, such as might be obtained during a colonoscopy, is known as a ditzel.
I think he’s referring to Slipery Jim DiGriz, aka The Stainless Steel Rat, though I don’t recall him using the term kilobucks.
I was though it turns out I was wrong. “Buck” is used as a term for money but kilobucks is not used. It seems like a term The Rat would use.
Now I have no idea where I got it from.
That is because… (Cue Darth Vader breathing)…I am your father, Princh. (End DVB).
I know you wanted me to say it 
I wonder if the expression has a home among lawyers? Another person from whom I heard it was also a lawyer. Or perhaps it’s a Brisbane thing.
I’ve always thought the “poof” component related to the poof sound effect of things vanishing - vanishingly small.
It occurs to me that the expression might be homophobic in origin, implying that the significance of gay men was negligible. I would be very disappointed if that were so.
I did want you to say it.
Jokes aside though my father is from NZ and isn’t a lawyer. I think your second last sentence is the most likely origin.
ETA: and his family background is in machining and engineering. So my guess is he would have heard it in the context of “a measurement so small it’s within tolerance and not worth worrying about”.
Hello Son. :eek:
Nah, I use Poofteenth.
Other ones which have also been said are:
Bees Dick (missed by a bees dick) Can also use Fleas foreskin.
9/10 of fuck all
Shave off a Dime and it will fit.
Always liked that one because most people can visualize that amount.
bissel, or bisl - that’s Yiddish for a little bit.
A gnat’s cock is the usual term in the building trade in England. We are considerably ruder than Americans…
In Chemistry it’s a (lowercase) delta. Charges which don’t reach a value of 1 are expressed as δ+ or δ-, and if you need to express a gradient along a molecule you add more deltas (δδ+ is smaller than δ+).