Slot Machines - WTF? Seriously, WTF???

[SenorBeef]

@Lanzy

I will completely disagree. I love slots and have great luck playing them. They are random but You are not. I have methods which work a lot of the time.

My last trip to the strosphere I played $1 slots at $3 at a time. I played about $100 and won a $700 win and later a $800 one. My profit was a little over $1000 in about an hour.
If you just start throwing money into a slot machine chances are you will lose. My big play is to find the slot guy working there and ask him/her which machine should be “hot”, tip him $20 and play that one, this works a huge precentage of the time.

Sounds like you should take up slots professionally. Has to be easier and better paying than your current job.

[Ogre]

@Lanzy

I will completely disagree. I love slots and have great luck playing them. They are random but You are not. I have methods which work a lot of the time.

My last trip to the strosphere I played $1 slots at $3 at a time. I played about $100 and won a $700 win and later a $800 one. My profit was a little over $1000 in about an hour.
If you just start throwing money into a slot machine chances are you will lose. My big play is to find the slot guy working there and ask him/her which machine should be “hot”, tip him $20 and play that one, this works a huge precentage of the time.

:smack:

[Bosstone]

@SenorBeef

I have no idea what the appeal is to sit in front of a machine pressing a button over again. Video games are about a hundred times more interesting at a tiny fraction of the price.

Keep in mind that many of the folks who like to sit at slots are older people. There’s a fair few 20-40 year olds, sure, but most people who like them are older than that. They get slot machines; they don’t really get video games. I remember reading something somewhere (vague, I know) that casinos were getting less and less business from the younger crowd, precisely because they got their button-pushing-flashy-light entertainment fix from video games.

When it comes to Skinner boxes, World of Warcraft has slot machines beat cold.

[Nancarrow]

@Lanzy

I will completely disagree. I love slots and have great luck playing them. They are random but You are not. I have methods which work a lot of the time.

My last trip to the strosphere I played $1 slots at $3 at a time. I played about $100 and won a $700 win and later a $800 one. My profit was a little over $1000 in about an hour.
If you just start throwing money into a slot machine chances are you will lose. My big play is to find the slot guy working there and ask him/her which machine should be “hot”, tip him $20 and play that one, this works a huge precentage of the time.

:rolleyes:

(fighting ignorance? hmm, well, I could try, but I have a feeling it’ll fight back, hard)

[Covered_In_Bees]

Okay that’s it! I’m moving to Vegas and becoming Lanzy’s “slot guy”. I know with effort and hard work I can figure out which slots will pay Lanzy the most often, as long as he keeps my wallet fat of course.

Sounds easier than actually playing the slots and praying to the correct god to beg for me to win.

[VinylTurnip]

Yeah, for $20 I hope he waits until you’re out of earshot before laughing his ass off.

[Covered_In_Bees]

You have that backwards.

I’ll try my best to wait until he’s out of earshot before laughing my ass off that I just made $20 and he’s about to lose everything else.

[VinylTurnip]

Ah, yeah. What I meant, actually.

[Covered_In_Bees]

So Mr. Turnip, looking for some leads on which machines are hot? For a mere $20 you can sitting pretty at one of these beauties and in no time I’m sure you’ll be hittin’ it big.

[Voyager]

@Lanzy

I will completely disagree. I love slots and have great luck playing them. They are random but You are not. I have methods which work a lot of the time.

My last trip to the strosphere I played $1 slots at $3 at a time. I played about $100 and won a $700 win and later a $800 one. My profit was a little over $1000 in about an hour.
If you just start throwing money into a slot machine chances are you will lose. My big play is to find the slot guy working there and ask him/her which machine should be “hot”, tip him $20 and play that one, this works a huge precentage of the time.

You sound just like my mother. She didn’t know anything about probability either.
Slots are not hot. Slots are not cold. Slots are slots, and the win percentage is regulated. I’ve heard rumors of slots in visible locations being set to pay off more to attract people, but I’d want to see proof of that.

The idea that a machine is hot is a variant (kind of the reverse) of the gambler’s fallacy. First, I doubt a slot guy know which machine are really hot, since machines ring for small payouts as well as large. Second I strongly expect that any casino employee (except waitresses and dealers) taking money from a player would get fired if they got seen - and they’d get seen. However if you found a guy who would take money, he sure is not going to wise you up.

My brother gambles quite a bit as a hobby, is quite good at math, and has even tried card counting. His conclusion is that the only way to make money in a casino is to play poker against bad players, and even then it is not guaranteed. You can lose less through good play, but not win.

[VinylTurnip]

The upcoming Bond film Skyfall is reported to have a scene in which Daniel Craig and Javier Bardem fight a battle of wits in a winner-take-all round of slots.

[Snarky_Kong]

I believe that you can have a positive expectation on slots with progressive jackpots; I could see playing one of those. Just a regular slot holds zero interest to me. You’re basically paying money to have someone flash lights in your face. At least with video poker you have choices to make.

[leahcim]

@Lanzy

My big play is to find the slot guy working there and ask him/her which machine should be “hot”, tip him $20 and play that one, this works a huge precentage of the time.

I also have a great system for making money off slots. It’s almost completely foolproof and works more than 99% of the time:

Open an casino.

[Covered_In_Bees]

Video poker can be profitable, if the rules are set up correctly. Since it does involve actual choices to be made by the player, you do have to play it correctly as well. The downside is that it’s pretty much a full time job just to get the $/hour to come out in your favor.

[Voyager]

@cmkeller

I read them, but darned if I can memorize them. And they’re different for every different kind of machine (to some degree, at least).

first, as others have said, you don’t have to know them. Second, most machines are very similar, with the symbols changed, not much else. If you spend time looking at the help screens, you’ll see that there are only a few types there.

I think the odds are exactly the same no matter how many lines you play - unless there is some special bonus which only kicks in if you play all the lines or something. Slots are a random walk around break even and trending to losing. If you have a finite amount of money, more lines will get you to bust faster, unless you have a winning cutoff point. If you want to play for a long time, you’ll go broke faster by increasing your betting velocity.

Places I go still have some of the really simple cherry, orange and lemon machines, which have fewer multiple lines. Look for them. I find them boring.

But really, the only slots I’ve ever seen with any skill component were some Trivial Pursuit machines which let you win more in the bonus round if you were actually good at trivia. They all seem to be gone, though.

If you really want to be confused, try a machine which plays by itself for 15 spins or so when you hit the bonus. You just have to trust it can add.

[Oakminster]

@Voyager

His conclusion is that the only way to make money in a casino is to play poker against bad players, and even then it is not guaranteed. You can lose less through good play, but not win.

Nah. There is one game I can beat at any casino, any time. It’s usually in a separate room. Sometimes there is a line to get in. Not real sure how you pronounce it, but it is spelled b-u-f-f-e-t.

Haven’t been to a casino in over a year now. That whole getting married then losing my job thing took a chunk out of my disposable income. When I did play, I liked the penny slots. I’d play them when I got too drunk/tired to play blackjack, or when sitting near one of the band stages. Really not getting the confusion about paylines…those are clearly marked on the machine, or on the touch screen, and usually have pretty similar patterns from machine to machine.

[Filbert]

In fairness, there used to be a regulation in the UK which enabled someone I know to earn actual decent money on slot machines.

Instead of paying out a certain % of the time, the wording was that they had to pay out at least once in every 20 games (might not have been 20, I can’t remember the exact number, and the reg has now been dropped, because it was clearly silly)- which meant if you saw someone playing on a machine, and it didn’t pay out in… say… 15 turns, it actually became statistically worth playing. He used to hang round just watching for that situation to occur, then jump on, and got sufficient money from it to get investigated on suspicion of forging £1 coins. Not the way I’d choose to spend my day, but it used to work here before the programming got changed, which was as soon as the regulation got dropped.

Other than that sort of situation… well… enjoy fooling yourself. I’ll pass.

[Fear_Itself]

@Ogre

All slot machines are, and have always been, Addiction Machines. They have the sole purpose of teasing you along while they rob you blind. They are not fun. I have trouble believing that anyone finds them so.

I know people who win thousands of dollars on slot machines. That makes it somewhat more fun.

[thelurkinghorror]

@VinylTurnip

The upcoming Bond film Skyfall is reported to have a scene in which Daniel Craig and Javier Bardem fight a battle of wits in a winner-take-all round of slots.

Heh. They should do Pai Gow Poker or Let It Ride. The whole movie could be them making $3 bets and making near-even money by the end. Then Bond says screw it and ices him under the table, like Han did in self defense. Or of course there is the original version of Casino Royale, where they play a game that requires 0% skill.

@leahcim

I also have a great system for making money off slots. It’s almost completely foolproof and works more than 99% of the time:

Casinos are closing left and right. You might be able to make off like a bandit with some creative bookkeeping when it closes, though.

[Voyager]

@Oakminster

Nah. There is one game I can beat at any casino, any time. It’s usually in a separate room. Sometimes there is a line to get in. Not real sure how you pronounce it, but it is spelled b-u-f-f-e-t.

Get back to us on that when you are sitting in an ambulance with your arteries clogged.