The first thing I did when searching was opened to me? Vanity search!
I hadn’t posted in so long, I was curious to see where I was when I was posting last. So I searched, and man, am I glad I am not at that point in my life anymore.
I’ve calmed down, my life calmed down. I have a beautiful little boy and another child on the way. Things have a purpose now, as opposed to the frenzied searching of my early 20’s. I was shocked at how immature my early posts came across. Like a 15 year old was writing instead of a 22-23 year old. Wow. I was just floored.
It’s a useful thing, I think, having a snapshot of your emotional life preserved like this. Does this ever happen to any of you guys?
When I started posting to this board, I was very left-of-center politically, and unconventional in my lifestyle.
Since then, I’ve had two kids, bought a house, moved across the country and back, and now find myself the very much the poster boy for the bourgeoisie. I enjoy keeping my front yard trimmed all nice and neat so as to fit in with my upper-middle-class neighbors. I work as a consultant for one of the more shadowy branches of the government and take pride in my small contribution to keeping this great land of ours safe and free.
Churchill supposedly said, “Any man under 30 who is not a liberal has no heart, and any man over 30 who is not a conservative has no brains.” I have both a heart and brains, so when I turned 30 I had to change.
I haven’t even been on the boards that long (less than two years), and I still feel like the person who joined was a stranger. Intellectually I guess we were about the same, but I’ve matured emotionally in too many ways to count. I used to live in a perpetual state of panic. It was so exhausting. I guess moving beyond that is an integral part of growing up.